Verboticisms

Created by: ohwtepph

Pronunciation: not-thees [thin]

Sentence: Mr. Crooks always had a problem with his ears. One day, he went to the doctor and asked, "Doctor, my ears are semi-deaf. Hell, I can't even hear my own farts." The doctor gave him a wonder medicine that was described to miraculously heal the ears. One day, the meds kicked in and he was rushed to the emergency room with the wife screaming, "Notthis! Notthis!" The emergeny room was in a mess when the medicine that the doctor gave Mr. Crooks intensified his flatus rather than aid his hearing.

Etymology: not this

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Created by: sanssouci

Pronunciation: Ree Flick Sir Lies

Sentence: I hesitated outside the brightly decorated shop and peered through the window. The shop was called Medimagic, it had only been trading for a month but already the business had got quiet a good reputation here in our little village of Greenwood, especially amongst the older community. Just the other day, while I was sitting on my wooden bench, relaxing in the afternoon sun outside my old little cottage. I was flabergasted to observe an energetic figure running towards me, my old mate Harold, 85 years old and there he was full of life like a sixteen year old lad! "They sell this herbal remedy George! They call it Relixerlize, I don't know what they put in it. It must be magic, look at me! I'm on fire" he loudly proclaimed, dancing around on my daffadils. Now here I was, curiosity got the better of me and I wanted a bit of what Harold had got. I stepped inside, I was getting myself some Relixerlize.

Etymology: reflex + elixer + revitalize = relixerlize reflex 1. noting or pertaining to an involuntary response to a stimulus 2. occurring in reaction; responsive. elixir 2.A substance believed to maintain life indefinitely. Also called elixir of life. 3. A substance or medicine believed to have the power to cure all ills. revitalize 1. to give new life to. 2. to give new vitality or vigor to.

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: Pu - bes - cebo

Sentence: Martha would not have told her husband that she added a multivitamin to his breakfast if she could have foreseen the pubescebo effect it would have on him, resulting in a trip to the doctor after his back went out.

Etymology: Pubescent - Placebo

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: Vie Act Tra

Sentence: Eugene's viactra had gotten so bad, he just asked his granddaughter to the prom.

Etymology: Viagra + Actor

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Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: ree-PEW-burr-tyze

Sentence: Gerald repubertised on Viagra, regaining the physical competence (and mental incompetence) of a teenager.

Etymology: re- (prefix) + puberty (physiological process of sexual maturation) + -ise (suffix)

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COMMENTS:

Haha! :) Voted! - Rhyme79, 2012-10-11: 10:18:00

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Created by: rephil

Pronunciation: pawnse

Sentence: Dr. A: "How did the procedure work out for Mrs. Hyde?" Nurse B: "The face lift turned out great -- got her a new boy toy. But he left over the stretch marks from the lipo -- so that was a bit of a ponce.

Etymology: Colloquial -- after Juan Ponce De Leon, first Spanish governor of Puerto Rico and legendary seeker of the Fountain of Youth.

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Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: reh-troh-KUHSH-uhn

Sentence: When Alex's father purchased a Maserati for his fiftieth birthday, the retrocussions were embarrassing, especially when Alex would introduce girlfriends to his gold-laden, shades-wearing, slang-misusing dad.

Etymology: retro- + repercussion

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COMMENTS:

Came alive when read in the sentence -- nice! - rephil, 2007-06-18: 10:15:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rep tyle dis funk shun

Sentence: "Doctor, Doctor" said Maude into the phone, "Those pills you gave Ed are making him act like a horny toad and an iguana who wanna...what's wrong with him?" The Doctor calmly replied, "He's just suffering from reptiledysfunction. He will go through stages where he will become a lounge lizard, play "Karma Chameleon"; vote for Newt Gingrich and redo your home in Art Gecko style. Just Monitor him and call me in the morning".

Etymology: Reptile (cold-blooded vertebrate) Dysfunction (any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part) & Wordplay on Erectile Dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection of his penis)

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COMMENTS:

Lol, how many reptile puns can you fit in?! You are clearly talented! ;) Made me smile. - Rhyme79, 2012-10-11: 10:23:00

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Created by: guesser

Pronunciation: Amor + oops

Sentence: Jenny, bothered by her husbands new "condition", called his Doctor to ask, "How many more mornings am I going to have to put up with his desire for Fruit Loops and Amoroops for Breakfast"?

Etymology: Amorous ( passionate ) + oops ( mistake )

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Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: ree JOO ven ay teez

Sentence: Randy has entered his rejuveneighties - that time of life with renewed vigor and the feeling that he should finish all those items on his "Bucket List" before it's too late. He also notices that many women eye him, and therefore says magnanimously that he should "make the rounds" and "give them what they want." But the main reason they pay attention to him is that he's one of the few available men remaining.

Etymology: rejuvenate + eighties (age)

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