Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Vlimtar
Created by: balku4
Pronunciation: vlimt
Sentence: i god this is a a vlimtar
Etymology: nonee
Voicejail
Created by: mikewhite
Pronunciation: voice-jail
Sentence: can I add a sentence for voicejail later?
Etymology: voice+jail: wordplay on voice+mail
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COMMENTS:
like this word...describes it perfectly!! - mweinmann, 2009-05-20: 08:43:00
Great word, mike...yes, please make a sentence, you know you can! - Nosila, 2009-05-22: 12:10:00
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Vexmail
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: veks mayl
Sentence: When Bruce tried calling the phone company to extend the minutes on his phone, he had to go through no less than 20 prompts of vexmail to reach the person he needed. By that point the call was moot because he had stomped his phone in an act of cellacide and put it into receivership.
Etymology: Vex (irritate, annoy) & Voicemail (automated phone message system)
Discontention
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: dis - con - ten - shun
Sentence: There was a tremendous amount of discontention as Lyle continued to scream and pound the phone on the table; even after the automaton had disconnected the call. Lyle was convinced that the automated voice had become angry and annoyed with his yelling and "hung" up on him....which made him even more riled up. He wondered how he could ever get revenge on the digitalmoron. It was indeed the winter of his digital discontent and disconnect...
Etymology: disconnection (Unexpected termination of a telephone connection) --> discontent (dissatisfaction,longing for something better than the present situation) --> tension (a balance between and interplay of opposing elements or tendencies,a state of mental or emotional strain)--> contention (controvery,a contentious speech act, In packet mode communication networks, contention is a condition that arises when two or more data stations attempt to transmit at the same time over a shared channel):)
Automaddening
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ah-toh-MAD-ning
Sentence: The more Lance fiddled with the automated answering service at the hospital the more automaddening it became, with him eventually tossing his cell phone on the floor and heading out to the hospital in his car knowing it would likely be faster.
Etymology: Blend of 'automated' and 'maddening'.
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COMMENTS:
Who needs bureaucracy when you have automaddening answering services to drive you insane? - dochanne, 2009-05-20: 23:29:00
Automaddening is so much quicker than doing it manually... - Nosila, 2009-05-20: 23:34:00
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Voicerail
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: voyse rayl
Sentence: The worst offenders are the ones supposedly out there helping you. Places like government agencies, city services, big corporations,banks... virtually any company with more than 2 people working in it. Roy was like many frustrated people. His anger and fury were incensed even further by having to go through a voicemail system. Or as he called it, a voicerail system. The more menu options he had to go through, the more irate he became. He'd waste an hour tip-toeing through all these numbers only to have to contact "0" to speak to a live human, because none of these options concerned his query. Just as he was about to shoot his phone with his Smith & Wesson, he was told the correct transit number to take and when it would depart...sometimes it's quicker just to stand at the stop and wait an hour!
Etymology: Voice Mail (a computerized interactive system for storing, processing and reproducing verbal messages left through a conventional telephone network) & Rail (spread negative information about;criticize severely;complain bitterly;rebel against)
Pressbuttirritant
Created by: dochanne
Pronunciation: Press-butt-ear-it-ant
Sentence: David just wanted to talk to someone about how he felt, but no matter what he did he couldn't get through to a human and kept getting lost in the voice-menu options. Before long he was no longer suicidal but was instead homicidal. He cursed and swore - "Damned presbuttirritant!" but in the end the mental health helpline hung up on him when he pressed the two instead of the two twice.
Etymology: Press button - usually what you're told to do by a pressbuttirritant; Irritant - grrrr! Presbyterian - a conveniently named religion, used here because some religions insist their followers press your (door) buttons in the early hours on the weekends and are thus also irritating. Not necessarily the Presbyterians themselves you understand.
Limboloop
Created by: arrrteest
Pronunciation: lim-boe-loop
Sentence: Jason knew that as soon as the computer started acting funny he had to call the customer service hotline. This frustrated him to no end because he knew that he would have to enter in the model number, serial number, the product code and the color of the unit before he even got to the limboloop hell of regional call centers, problem troubleshooting, cream and sugar preference, and choice of wait time muzak, only to have to give the same information when transfered to a human voice with a Irish Catholic name and an Indian accent.
Etymology: limbo, a place or state of oblivion to which persons or things are regarded as being relegated when cast aside, forgotten, past, or out of date + loop,Something having a shape, order, or path of motion that is circular or curved over on itself.
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COMMENTS:
Great word. Matches the definition very nicely. - Mustang, 2008-04-15: 03:34:00
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Vexmessaging
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: vex mess ajing
Sentence: Vexmessaging is described as what used to be a 2 minute inquiry call to a company, greeted by a pleasant, real live person, which has been replaced with a very long battle with an automatronic simulated human voice which does not give you enough options to get an answer. Vexmessaging gives companies the statistics that say their complaints this year are fewer. It is only because no one can get through to anyone to complain!!! Your call is important to us... indeed!
Etymology: Vex (to irritate, annoy,disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress;cause annoyance in;especially by minor irritations or be a mystery or bewildering to) & Messaging (sending a message or receiving one)& rhymes with Text Messaging (how everyone under 30 communicates in abbreviated codes, by cell phone/blackberry or other computerized device...even if they are in the same room as those with whom they communicating!)
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COMMENTS:
Covers it quite nicely. Great word! - Mustang, 2009-05-20: 04:58:00
so true - Jabberwocky, 2009-05-22: 13:15:00
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Hapline
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: hap-line
Sentence: I called up customer service trying to resolve my issue. Navigating the Indo-audio maze, I eventually surrendered to the hapline and just hung up.
Etymology: hapless- ill fated + helpline- customer service via phone
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-04-14: 07:25:00
I miss silveryaspen.
Mustang - 2008-04-15: 03:35:00
Where did silveryaspen go?
Silveryaspen has retired from active duty. But I am sure she is still creating Verboticisms in her head and saying wonderful things about all the Verbotomy Writers! ~ James
Mustang - 2008-04-16: 06:26:00
She is missed. She did indeed say some very nice things about Verbotomizers.
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
readerwriter - 2009-05-20: 07:52:00
How long is summer vacation? Just trying to make plans...
We work flex hours, so it is variable. I will send out an announcement when we start anew. ~ James