Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Agendizzement
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: a/jen/deez/mant
Sentence: The agendizzement was so convoluted and confusing that he soon developed a case of mennui and gave up ordering pizza.
Etymology: agenda + dizzy + aggrandizement (cause to appear greater than is the case)
Telrettes
Created by: griffiegrrl
Pronunciation: Tell-retts
Sentence: John was experiencing Tellrettes when he was on an automated help-line the other day, and required a tranquilizer to calm him down.
Etymology: Turrets Syndrome (Spelling tweaked), Telephone
Autocommunifrustratilooplooploop
Created by: CanadianAndyCapp
Pronunciation: Or-tow-kom-U-ni-fruss-tray-tee-loop-loop-loop (with the final three loops said in an increasingly aggitated, high, strangulated manner)
Sentence: (Taken from a speech by General Ludd)...."...Tecno-phobes and Luddites unite! you have only the shackles of your automated communications and information data retrieval systems to lose. We have been tricked into believing that these "new and improved" technologies were developed to improve our lives. Not So! they are the subvertive systems by which we are brainwashed into surrendering our individual creative and social capabilities to the mind-numbing and straitjacket methods of the computerised system we are trying to use. For proof we need look no further than the omnipresent office automatic phone systems and their cunningly devised autocommunifrustratilooplooploop tortures. Arise, rebels of the future and reclaim your sanity and souls!!!!..." This message is recorded for public information. Please press one to repeat this message, Two for information on how to...........looplooploop
Etymology: Auto - Automatic (Constantly breaking down) / Communi - Communication (totally without intelligent substance) / Frustrati - Frustration (The Human condition) / Looplooploop (Go back to the beginning and start again-again-again)
Phonejail
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /FOHN-jeyl/
Sentence: Kevin felt like a convict trying to escape from the phonejail system that his health care service provider used, where he'd been 'serving time' for most of the afternoon, forced to listen to their repetitive announcements and trying to navigate the labyrinth of menu options and the 'Interactive Voice Renouncement' system they use to support their customers. If he heard the words "your call is very important to us" a couple more times, Kevin thought, he might just go throttle somebody, who would then need to speak with the health care service more desperately than he did now.
Etymology: Play on the word 'phonemail': Phone - shortening of telephone (from French, téléphone "far" + "sound") + Jail - a detention facility or correctional institution (Old French, jaole "a cage, prison")
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COMMENTS:
Love it Tigger...somedays your 'sentences' are longer than others and there is no pardon or time off for good behaviour! - Nosila, 2008-04-14: 19:37:00
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Annoyoanswer
Created by: phonesalad
Pronunciation: Annoy-o-answer
Sentence: OMG. This anoyoanswer is killing me. It thought I said "French fries and pickle goats taste like cheddar."
Etymology: annoy + o + answer
Dialdrone
Created by: bookowl
Pronunciation: dial/drone
Sentence: He kept trying to disconnect from the menu but instead of getting a dial tone he got a dialdrone.
Etymology: dial tone + drone
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COMMENTS:
Been there, done that. Good word. - Mustang, 2008-04-15: 03:36:00
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Voicejail
Created by: mikewhite
Pronunciation: voice-jail
Sentence: can I add a sentence for voicejail later?
Etymology: voice+jail: wordplay on voice+mail
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COMMENTS:
like this word...describes it perfectly!! - mweinmann, 2009-05-20: 08:43:00
Great word, mike...yes, please make a sentence, you know you can! - Nosila, 2009-05-22: 12:10:00
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Discontention
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: dis - con - ten - shun
Sentence: There was a tremendous amount of discontention as Lyle continued to scream and pound the phone on the table; even after the automaton had disconnected the call. Lyle was convinced that the automated voice had become angry and annoyed with his yelling and "hung" up on him....which made him even more riled up. He wondered how he could ever get revenge on the digitalmoron. It was indeed the winter of his digital discontent and disconnect...
Etymology: disconnection (Unexpected termination of a telephone connection) --> discontent (dissatisfaction,longing for something better than the present situation) --> tension (a balance between and interplay of opposing elements or tendencies,a state of mental or emotional strain)--> contention (controvery,a contentious speech act, In packet mode communication networks, contention is a condition that arises when two or more data stations attempt to transmit at the same time over a shared channel):)
Automaddening
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ah-toh-MAD-ning
Sentence: The more Lance fiddled with the automated answering service at the hospital the more automaddening it became, with him eventually tossing his cell phone on the floor and heading out to the hospital in his car knowing it would likely be faster.
Etymology: Blend of 'automated' and 'maddening'.
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COMMENTS:
Who needs bureaucracy when you have automaddening answering services to drive you insane? - dochanne, 2009-05-20: 23:29:00
Automaddening is so much quicker than doing it manually... - Nosila, 2009-05-20: 23:34:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-04-14: 07:25:00
I miss silveryaspen.
Mustang - 2008-04-15: 03:35:00
Where did silveryaspen go?
Silveryaspen has retired from active duty. But I am sure she is still creating Verboticisms in her head and saying wonderful things about all the Verbotomy Writers! ~ James
Mustang - 2008-04-16: 06:26:00
She is missed. She did indeed say some very nice things about Verbotomizers.
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
readerwriter - 2009-05-20: 07:52:00
How long is summer vacation? Just trying to make plans...
We work flex hours, so it is variable. I will send out an announcement when we start anew. ~ James