Verboticisms

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: dis - con - ten - shun

Sentence: There was a tremendous amount of discontention as Lyle continued to scream and pound the phone on the table; even after the automaton had disconnected the call. Lyle was convinced that the automated voice had become angry and annoyed with his yelling and "hung" up on him....which made him even more riled up. He wondered how he could ever get revenge on the digitalmoron. It was indeed the winter of his digital discontent and disconnect...

Etymology: disconnection (Unexpected termination of a telephone connection) --> discontent (dissatisfaction,longing for something better than the present situation) --> tension (a balance between and interplay of opposing elements or tendencies,a state of mental or emotional strain)--> contention (controvery,a contentious speech act, In packet mode communication networks, contention is a condition that arises when two or more data stations attempt to transmit at the same time over a shared channel):)

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: dial/drone

Sentence: He kept trying to disconnect from the menu but instead of getting a dial tone he got a dialdrone.

Etymology: dial tone + drone

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COMMENTS:

Been there, done that. Good word. - Mustang, 2008-04-15: 03:36:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: helpwīn

Sentence: Most every company has some version of a helpwhine. If you can push the right buttons, you are allowed to vent your frustrations to somebody who may or may not care what you have to say — somebody who may or may not speak discernible English. This assumes that you are ever able to find that lone human in the maze of options. ”Your Call is very important to... click”.

Etymology: help (assist) + whine (a feeble or petulant complaint)

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COMMENTS:

Dead on! - catgrin, 2010-06-21: 05:49:00

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: ĭl'ĭ-dĭ-jĭt'ə-mĭt

Sentence: The illedigitemate "help" menu Bjorn reached when he called AT&T was all but helpful. After wearing a blister on his button finger and being irritated to the point of requiring three double gin-and-tonics he hung up and found the answer he needed in the help menu on his cell phone.

Etymology: meld of 'illegitimate' and 'digit' (finger)/'digital.'

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COMMENTS:

fun to say - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-14: 16:21:00

Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhm. Three double gin-and-tonics . . . I can almost taste the lime on my stirring digit. - doseydotes, 2008-04-14: 16:35:00

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Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: uh-bliv-eh-kers

Sentence: Jonesy had a secret life. Under the happy facade or bubbliness and congeniality, she was really a curmudgeon and a misanthrope. She was a call center operator script engineer. She was responsible for the impossible recursive loop design that would often frustrate callers. With each possible combination, she would oblivicurse the respondant with a multitude of irrelavent, ambiguous and time consuming questions that would often lead the person back to the beginning. With this, she would sit down and smile darkly.

Etymology: Oblivion + Curse

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COMMENTS:

Like that one, pieceof314...I just knew those IT types belonged to convens and every company has them! - Nosila, 2008-04-14: 19:43:00

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Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: hap-line

Sentence: I called up customer service trying to resolve my issue. Navigating the Indo-audio maze, I eventually surrendered to the hapline and just hung up.

Etymology: hapless- ill fated + helpline- customer service via phone

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Created by: diyan627

Pronunciation: press two ster loop

Sentence: Tina spent an hour and forty-five minutes on the most insane, frustrating presstwosterloop scam her cell phone company is putting customers through. After explaining her situation to 7 representatives, they still owed her $350 for the "promotional phone" she got 4 months ago. The presstwosterloop didn't stop her ... She finally hung up and drove down to the store where she raised a ruckus until the manager got her problem taken care of. Or so he said.

Etymology: Press two (ah, the options!) + ster (one that is associated with, participates, does) + loop (circular action)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: voyse rayl

Sentence: The worst offenders are the ones supposedly out there helping you. Places like government agencies, city services, big corporations,banks... virtually any company with more than 2 people working in it. Roy was like many frustrated people. His anger and fury were incensed even further by having to go through a voicemail system. Or as he called it, a voicerail system. The more menu options he had to go through, the more irate he became. He'd waste an hour tip-toeing through all these numbers only to have to contact "0" to speak to a live human, because none of these options concerned his query. Just as he was about to shoot his phone with his Smith & Wesson, he was told the correct transit number to take and when it would depart...sometimes it's quicker just to stand at the stop and wait an hour!

Etymology: Voice Mail (a computerized interactive system for storing, processing and reproducing verbal messages left through a conventional telephone network) & Rail (spread negative information about;criticize severely;complain bitterly;rebel against)

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Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Press-butt-ear-it-ant

Sentence: David just wanted to talk to someone about how he felt, but no matter what he did he couldn't get through to a human and kept getting lost in the voice-menu options. Before long he was no longer suicidal but was instead homicidal. He cursed and swore - "Damned presbuttirritant!" but in the end the mental health helpline hung up on him when he pressed the two instead of the two twice.

Etymology: Press button - usually what you're told to do by a pressbuttirritant; Irritant - grrrr! Presbyterian - a conveniently named religion, used here because some religions insist their followers press your (door) buttons in the early hours on the weekends and are thus also irritating. Not necessarily the Presbyterians themselves you understand.

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /FOHN-jeyl/

Sentence: Kevin felt like a convict trying to escape from the phonejail system that his health care service provider used, where he'd been 'serving time' for most of the afternoon, forced to listen to their repetitive announcements and trying to navigate the labyrinth of menu options and the 'Interactive Voice Renouncement' system they use to support their customers. If he heard the words "your call is very important to us" a couple more times, Kevin thought, he might just go throttle somebody, who would then need to speak with the health care service more desperately than he did now.

Etymology: Play on the word 'phonemail': Phone - shortening of telephone (from French, téléphone "far" + "sound") + Jail - a detention facility or correctional institution (Old French, jaole "a cage, prison")

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COMMENTS:

Love it Tigger...somedays your 'sentences' are longer than others and there is no pardon or time off for good behaviour! - Nosila, 2008-04-14: 19:37:00

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