Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Presstress
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: press stress
Sentence: Murray's patience was running out...he was feeling the presstress of waiting on the phone for over 10 minutes now, after having been forced to press many choices to get to his final destination and then they put him on hold. What happened to when you phoned somewhere and got a live human to answer your questions? What made the powers that be decide to substitute pretend humans for real ones. He knew that lady's voice on the phone better than his own mother's! His aggravation grew and he presstressed some more, only to still end up on that message,"Your call is important to us, we value your business, please wait on the line for the next available operator". Sheesh, how hard was it to get a pizza anyway? And then he realized his error...in his presstress, he had not called Tony's 30 Minute Pizza, but had in error pushed another number. Good thing he was not dying or in trouble, just hungry, because he had accidentally pushed 911 instead!
Etymology: press (the act of pressing; the exertion of pressure or the state of urgently demanding notice or attention) & stress (a state of mental or emotional strain or suspense; or test the limits of)
Vocaldisturbia
Created by: scarletzinc
Pronunciation: woh-kuhl-des-tuhr-bee-aah
Sentence: The phone agencies have set their vocaldisturbia strategies to annoy users.
Etymology: vocal-voice disturbia-disturbance
Digigeridoo
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: dij/i/uh-ree-doo
Sentence: Whenever I phone Bell Canada, our national phone company for service, I always encounter the digigeridoo system, which encompasses pressing hundreds of buttons which only produces unintelligible irritating voice activated drone sounds and than a very clear "Thank you for calling Bell".
Etymology: digit + didgeridoo (a musical instrument of Australian Aborigines that creates a low drone sound)
Hapline
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: hap-line
Sentence: I called up customer service trying to resolve my issue. Navigating the Indo-audio maze, I eventually surrendered to the hapline and just hung up.
Etymology: hapless- ill fated + helpline- customer service via phone
Voicerail
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: voyse rayl
Sentence: The worst offenders are the ones supposedly out there helping you. Places like government agencies, city services, big corporations,banks... virtually any company with more than 2 people working in it. Roy was like many frustrated people. His anger and fury were incensed even further by having to go through a voicemail system. Or as he called it, a voicerail system. The more menu options he had to go through, the more irate he became. He'd waste an hour tip-toeing through all these numbers only to have to contact "0" to speak to a live human, because none of these options concerned his query. Just as he was about to shoot his phone with his Smith & Wesson, he was told the correct transit number to take and when it would depart...sometimes it's quicker just to stand at the stop and wait an hour!
Etymology: Voice Mail (a computerized interactive system for storing, processing and reproducing verbal messages left through a conventional telephone network) & Rail (spread negative information about;criticize severely;complain bitterly;rebel against)
Voicejail
Created by: mikewhite
Pronunciation: voice-jail
Sentence: can I add a sentence for voicejail later?
Etymology: voice+jail: wordplay on voice+mail
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COMMENTS:
like this word...describes it perfectly!! - mweinmann, 2009-05-20: 08:43:00
Great word, mike...yes, please make a sentence, you know you can! - Nosila, 2009-05-22: 12:10:00
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Vexchange
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: veks chaynj
Sentence: When Rory got the usual runaround on the voice-activated system of his telephone provider, he went crazy pushing numbers, trying to connect to the complaint department. He figured that this was their main vexchange and it took him 20 minutes of phone aggro before he was finally cut off. It is just as well that he did not reach a real human voice, as he would then have discovered that the agent worked half a world away and spoke English he had just learned in the past 6 months!Ma Bell was now Ma Dumbbell in his books.
Etymology: Vex (cause annoyance in; disturb, especially by minor irritations)& Exchange (a workplace that serves as a telecommunications facility where lines from telephones can be connected together to permit communication)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-04-14: 07:25:00
I miss silveryaspen.
Mustang - 2008-04-15: 03:35:00
Where did silveryaspen go?
Silveryaspen has retired from active duty. But I am sure she is still creating Verboticisms in her head and saying wonderful things about all the Verbotomy Writers! ~ James
Mustang - 2008-04-16: 06:26:00
She is missed. She did indeed say some very nice things about Verbotomizers.
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
readerwriter - 2009-05-20: 07:52:00
How long is summer vacation? Just trying to make plans...
We work flex hours, so it is variable. I will send out an announcement when we start anew. ~ James