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'Yuck! Your dog is trying to kiss me!'

DEFINITION: n. Embarrassing pet behavior; may be perfectly natural for the pet, but often makes humans feel self-conscious or ill at ease. v. To be embarrassed by your pet's beahviour

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Verboticisms

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Hypersnorgascity

Created by: verysimplegame

Pronunciation: hi-pur-snore-gah-ci-tee

Sentence: Prince's hypersnorgacity manifested itself infrequently, but when it did, Beth knew no Wet-Wipes™ could clean the stains from her soul.

Etymology: Hyper+snorgle+acity

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Petified

Created by: vermeulenstevos

Pronunciation: Pet-tea-fied

Sentence: Every time my girlfriend comes over I'm petified that Max might jump her

Etymology: Pet-animal kept at your home and cared for petrified-being scared

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Droolofdenial

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: drool of de ny al

Sentence: When Jack Russell ran into Germaine Shepherd at the Greyhound Bus Depot, he had been walking his hound, Fido. Fido immediately jumped all over Germaine and slobbered all over her face. She shouted at Jack to Puli him off her. Jack tried valiantly but said, "Sorry, he's just friendly...he has so much love to give, like me! You are such a pretty Lassie!" Germaine unleashed her fury and demanded that Jack & Fido's adoration be harnassed. To calm Germaine, he invited her into the nearest pub, "The Dirty Dog" for a hair of the dog that bit her. She told the bartender, "I'll Havanese...no, make it a double!" Jack ordered a Scotch Terrier and soda. "Muzzle Tov!", he said and they had a few more. "Jack", she said, "You are not such a bad breed, but you need to send Fido to obedience school". When he objected, she told him she was not usually a Pointer, but he was in a Droolofdenial and that if he wanted to see her again, he'd have to obey. Well, our Jack tried many schools, he even went as far away as Labrador, Newfoundland, the Great Pyrenees, even Afghanistan, Lhasa Apso, Chihuahua and Brittany. But none could train his Fido not to drool. He had run away for months. He even prayed to Saint Bernard for guidance. Finally, he returned to the pub and was panting when he saw Germaine,looking fetching in her Poodle skirt, eating Beagles & Lox and drinking Bassett Ale. When he went over to Retriever, he saw that she was curled up with a Husky Boxer, a Great Dane named Erik, who was eating his Chow with a Pinscher salt,some Collieflour and some Maltese candies. He was also taking a Pekingnese at her Schnauzer with his Bischon Frise, his Mastiff, as he tried to Whippet out. Russell thought it disgusting and trotted over to mark his territory. "Oh, Jack", she said, "Don't be Samoyed... what you felt was only Puppy Love for me, what I love about Erik is that he is a Rover, not a Setter, the best Keeshond I've had and he won't Stay unless I want him to!" Jack slinked out of the pub, with his tail between his legs, saying, "That Bitch, I'm so past Cairn! I don't give a Rin Tin Tin for her"

Etymology: drool (slobber, saliva spilling from the mouth,pretentious or silly talk or writing) & denial ((psychiatry) a defense mechanism that denies painful thoughts;the act of refusing to comply (as with a request);the act of asserting that something alleged is not true) & Jewel of The Nile (for rhyming effect)(a popular 1985 Michael Douglas/Kathleen Turner/Danny DeVito movie whose tagline was "When the going gets tough, the tough get going".

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COMMENTS:

Great K9 tail. Tell Jack Russell that Afghani Stan is full of kabul. By the way, where did Din go? - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-04: 03:07:00

I had a dog like that once....half poodle and half poodle...a poopoo dog. - Mustang, 2008-07-04: 17:09:00

Bob, I think Din was led by his nose somewhere...aren't thney all? Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-07-05: 00:22:00

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Birdition

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: burd/i/shun

Sentence: I always feel like I'm in birdition when I visit Jill's house. She has canarys that fly free and deposit loads of bird crap and feathers on me.

Etymology: bird + perdition (anguish, nether world)

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COMMENTS:

petaj It's brave soul who walks the road to birdition. Take a raincoat. - petaj, 2007-04-27: 21:02:00

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Petophile

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: petəfīl

Sentence: There is a rule at the dog park that no children under 12 should enter the off-leash area. To do so often results in the children being knocked over and petophiled by most of the male and many of the female dogs present. Looks like that **Birds & Bees** talk may need to be moved up on the calendar.

Etymology: pet (a domestic or tamed animal or bird kept for companionship or pleasure and treated with care and affection) + pedophile (a person who is sexually attracted to children)

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Petabarrassment

Created by: totalyclipse

Pronunciation: pet a barr assment

Sentence: He was diagnosed with petabarrassment.

Etymology: Said to be from Greek penta (five) with the middle letter removed, as if the previously coined prefix tera- had been formed in the same way from Greek tetra (four).

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Chewmiliated

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: choo mil ee ay ted

Sentence: When Hugo brought his puppy home, everyone thought that it was adorable. As time went by though, it developed a bad habit of gnawing on leather goods, particularily shoes. Hugo was chewmiliated to find that when he held an anniversary party for his parents that the dog had destroyed all the guests' shoes left at the front door. Shredded beyond recognition, all that was left was a pile unwearable footwear. That dog had sole alright...

Etymology: Chew (biting and grinding in your mouth)& Humiliated (embarrassed by;mortified;made to feel uncomfortable because of shame or wounded pride)

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Nonmannerism

Created by: ekath

Pronunciation: non-man-er-ism

Sentence: My dog's most striking nonmannerism is her tendency to rub her butt on the stairs (for some obscure medical reason). My little brother, watching this, tried to imitate her and ended up getting carpet burn on his rear.

Etymology: from non + "man" + mannerism

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COMMENTS:

That story is so funny it must be true! - wordmeister, 2007-04-28: 22:49:00

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Fur pas

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: ferr-pah

Sentence: His dog burying its face into his new girlfriends groin was an embarrassing Fur Pas

Etymology: Fur, Faux Pas

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Dognoxious

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: dog-NOX-shuss

Sentence: Thomas was always on edge when company came as his mutt Ruff was sure to be dognoxious by slobbering all over his guests, humping their legs and sometimes do even worse things, including 'watering' their shoes.

Etymology: Blend of works 'dog' (canine pet) and 'obnoxious' (highly objectionable or offensive; odious)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-27: 00:02:50
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes.
Thank you purpleartichokes! ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-27: 00:03:45
Yes the rumors are true. This week we are offering the The Verbotomy Cup as prize for the top player of the week. See details on the Verbotomy Blog ~ James

Jabberwocky - 2007-04-27: 12:54:00
Hi Verbotomy, Those cups (mugs)are really great. Would it be possible for any of us to purchase ones even if we don't win?

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-27: 23:57:00
Hi Jabberwocky, Glad you like the Verbotomy Cup! It is our wampeter, and as such I don't think we would sell it, because that might turn it into a MacGuffin. ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-04-28: 01:07:00
Is it our waxing or waning wampeter? What's the other one (since a karass always has exactly two wampeters)?

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-28: 08:49:00
I believe it is still waxing. And think that Dan Pink's right brain is the other wampeter. ~ James

mana1066 - 2007-05-06: 23:04:00
some of that went right over my head. whine! i want a cup too!

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-07-04: 07:54:00
Quit a tail from the punster extrordinaire! Poor FIDO is the Lee Harvey Oswald of doggie misbehavior.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-13: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James