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'Why are you putting that by the front door?'

DEFINITION: n., An ugly decorative item or article of clothing received from friends or relatives, which is kept stored away but ready to be pulled out at a moment's notice in anticipation of a return visit. v., To temporarily place an old, and perhaps unattractive gift in a place of honor.

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Faceholder

Created by: emdeejay

Pronunciation: Faye Solder

Sentence: Dear old Aunt Faye. She would be best described as having a heart of gold, being generous to a fault, and possessing a taste for the profoundly kitsch. The cupboards of her relatives were stacked to the brim with gifts ranging from the impossibly garish, to the patently absurd. This year, Jayne and John were taking their turn at hosting the family festive gathering. Some show of appreciation for Faye's presence would have to be shown, so after a short deliberation it was down with the Salvador Dali print, and up with "Big Mouth Billy Bass"! Fortunately the luncheon passed without major incident; the family chipper, overfed, and blissfully subdued. Suddenly, an uncomfortable silence fell over the mirthful murmur as Faye inquired: "John whatever became of that delightful water feature I gave you, or that fabulous paisley shirt?" Faceholder to the rescue! John strolled casually over to Billy Bass and just before pressing the button he remarked "Dear Aunt Faye! My shirt has been worn so often, it's at the tailors for a mend. But Billy you see is the pride of the mantle!" And the family, relieved, joined Billy in a rousing rendition of "Take me to the river"

Etymology: Placeholder: Object or entity employed until an adequate replacement can be found. Face (to save): action employed for the purpose of maintaining dignity.

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Giftaslot

Created by: looseball

Pronunciation: gift+a+slot

Sentence: Go to the giftaslot now there that b,atch come's again.

Etymology:

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Gifthoarse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gift hors

Sentence: Christmas Season means family visits and redecorating to accommodate and proudly show off the bizarre previous gifts reveived from the visitors. When Wendy & Peter redecorated, they always included the present his Mother had given him and thought was a perfect addition to their lodge-like home, Billy-The-Singing-Big-Bass-Fish-Stuck-On-A-Wall-Plaque. She would repeatedly push the button and play "YMCA" over and over, laughing all the way. Luckily so many years of abuse had almost worn out his singing voice and Billy was now a gifthoarse.

Etymology: Gift (present) & Gifthorse (a gift (usually of inferior quality) that should be accepted uncritically) & Hoarse (deep and harsh sounding as if from shouting or illness or emotion)

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Shiftagift

Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: sh - ift - uh - gift

Sentence: Tom was really getting tired of playing shiftagift. He had so many tired, ugly things that people had given him and everytime one of them was due to visit, he felt that he had to "shift" his apartment around so that his friends and family would think that he was using the things they had given him.

Etymology: Shift (to move or change around) + Gift (a present or freely given item)

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Nandoohickey

Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Nan-doo-hickey

Sentence: Dave looked high and low, knowing Sandra would have hidden the dastardly thing well, and eventually found it. Tucked behind the blankets on the bottom shelf in the linen cupboard, he found his grandmother's favourite teapot, the grotesque frills and golden seashells just too much to bear. But Nanna was coming for tea and would expect her most obvious rellymajigs to be on show. "Good grief!" said Sandra, "You can't expect me to use that awful nandoohickey! I should have dropped the damn thing last time."

Etymology: Nan or nanna - grandmother, or great-aunt, frequently known for giving strange or age-inappropriate gifts because you were five last time they saw you. Doohickey - gadget, thingamebob or whatchamacallit that some dolt gave you but you don't know what to do with.

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COMMENTS:

Good one - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:10:00

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Intensgiftfy

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/tens/gift/fie

Sentence: Quick, we'd better intensgiftfy the weeping madonna by taking her out from behind the couch and seating her at the table.

Etymology: intensify + gift

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Prezzidigitate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PREZZ-ee-DIJ-ee-TATE

Sentence: Bob had just put away the kitschsake toaster-clock his mother had given him many years before, when he heard the news that his mother-in-law was on her way over to his place. Quickly, and in order not to offend her, he rummaged through an old trunk in his garage to find the indoor sundial she had given him as a birthday present. Fortunately for him, with good luck and a dash of good memory, he found it and prezzidigitated it, as a dragonsop, into a place of prominence and importance for her to see.

Etymology: Blend of PREZZI: (slang for present, gift.) & PRESTIDIGITATE: to be manually dexterios in the execution of tricks ; sleight of hand. KITSCHSAKE: Conflation of KITSCH(from German)meaning: gaudy, trashy objects or items and (OE) SAKE, as in "keepsake", meaning an item kept for the sake of the giver. DRAGONSOP: DRAGON-Slang term for mother-in-law or wife; SOP: Anything given (or done)to pacify; -- so called from the sop given to Cerberus, as related in mythology.

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COMMENTS:

Works like magic for me! - silveryaspen, 2008-12-16: 22:36:00

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Shufflegift

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: SHUF + l + gift

Sentence: Thurman had perfected the art of shufflegift by keeping hideous shirts and other clothing items in the laundry hamper and decorating an ugly lamp as a coat hanger.

Etymology: Shuffle = to move around from place to place + gift.

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COMMENTS:

like it - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-12: 13:23:00

Very clever! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-12-12: 20:03:00

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Beautifake

Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: 'byu ti fayk

Sentence: "Uncle Simone is coming over, Samantha. Time to beautifake yourself."..."No way, Dad. That plaid sweater is such an ugly beautifakation."

Etymology: beautify + fake

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Whitelephantasmagoria

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: whyt EL eh fan TAZ ma GOR ee ah

Sentence: Over the holidays, my house becomes a whitelephantasmagoria of sorts, as I rotate in and out the succession of useless and hideous items given to me over the years by various relatives. I have to keep a calendar of who is coming when, so that the correct one is on display on the correct day. God forbid I put out the horrid quilt made for my grandchildren by their grandmother, my EX-mother-in-law, when my CURRENT mother-in-law visits. She has an uncanny sense for such things.

Etymology: white elephant + phantasmagoria (a constantly shifting complex succession of things seen or imagined; a series or group of strange or bizarre images seen as if in a dream)

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COMMENTS:

Whitelephantasmagoria are kept in a special trunk...good word - Nosila, 2009-12-16: 22:15:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-12: 01:20:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie Thank you kabloozie ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-16: 00:08:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James