Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gift hors

Sentence: It had become a tradition at Christmas as much as decorating the tree and putting up lights. It meant Mother was coming to stay for the holidays and although we loved her dearly and looked forward to seeing her, we had to dig out that painting she had given us many years ago and hang it over the fireplace. It stayed the rest of the yhear in the attic. That's because it was painted on black velvet, with glow-in-the-dark paints, framed inside a gaudy rococco gilt frame. Yes, being his #1 fan, Mother had bought us a portrait of Elvis. Wearing a white jumpsuit, sneering into the microphone in his hand and tilting his pelvis our way! You could push a button at the bottom of the frame and tinny music of him singing would belt out. Our friends who visited over the years hooted and hollered at the tacky image. Neighbours would make the pilgrimmage each year to see The King. He was a gifthoarse that made people laugh and sing along. We always said we would pull him out for Mother's visit, so as not to hurt her feelings, but one of these years old age would overtake her and we would no longer be obligated to carry on the charade. It was then that we realized that the song he sang from the portrait, "I'll have a Blue Christmas without you" would become very poignant to us.

Etymology: gift (a present, something given) & hoarse (deep and harsh sounding as if from shouting or illness or emotion) & old saying: "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" old proverb which means don't question how you acquired something or what it cost. The advice given is be grateful for your good fortune and don't look for more by examining it to assess its value.

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COMMENTS:

Awwww. How moving. Nice work, Lady. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-16: 02:40:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: igzibilyəs

Sentence: Nobody is quite sure why Jon*s aunt thought it was an appropriate wedding gift or why she brought it back from Borneo in the first place. Some say she spent too much time in the sun. Others suspect a side-effect of a medication combination. Whatever the case, the godawful, gilded, stuffed monkey candelabra takes its exhibilious spot on the dining room table whenever she comes to visit. The good news is that there is not much need to prepare extravagant meals when the **flaming monkey god** is on display.

Etymology: exibit (publicly display a work of art or item of interest) + bilious (affected by or associated with nausea or vomiting)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: horror-on-er

Sentence: Holly hauled the horrific heirloom out of the house and secreted it behind a heavyduty tarpaulin in the shed. She felt sure that Granny, at 94, would surely not live to see out another Christmas. This was likely the last time she would have to horroronour the hand-carved horologue.

Etymology: horror + honour

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COMMENTS:

Hysterical :-) - emdeejay, 2008-12-16: 05:39:00

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: kuri/oh/traw/city

Sentence: A curiotrocity is a curio that is so atrocious that it defies description. I have several.

Etymology: curio + atrocity

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Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: sh - ift - uh - gift

Sentence: Tom was really getting tired of playing shiftagift. He had so many tired, ugly things that people had given him and everytime one of them was due to visit, he felt that he had to "shift" his apartment around so that his friends and family would think that he was using the things they had given him.

Etymology: Shift (to move or change around) + Gift (a present or freely given item)

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Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: un-bee-leave-uh-baw-bull

Sentence: Martin could see Cheryl's car coming down his street. He immediately lept into action. Ordinarily, he would have been prepared and had the hand sequined tapestry of Liberace taken out and hung well in advance of her visit, but as this was an unannounced drop-in, he had to scurry to unpack the unbelievabauble from the depths of the cellar storage room.

Etymology: unbelievable + bauble ok... this was my submission last time too... but i couldn't think of another.

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: i-store

Sentence: When Dave's Auntie Joan had given him the hideous orange and green vase for Christmas last year he smiled broadly and thanked her very much telling her it was beautiful. However as soon as she had left he wrapped up the eyestore and put it straight into the loft. Auntie Joan is due to visit again this year on christmas day, so the plan is to get in the loft on Christmas eve and put the offending object in pride of place on the mantlepiece in the hope that it fools her into thinking that it has been there all year.

Etymology: Play on Eyesore

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: rez-ure-REG-ahl-ee-uh

Sentence: Babs and Jake always greeted the holidays with excitement and dread. With extended family coming to visit, these reunions often degenerated into verbal slug fests. Babs would prepare the mandatory dishes, and Jake's job was to break out the RESURREGALIA...those tacky gifts and mementoes which would have been endearing if they weren't SO ugly and tasteless. Jake was especially fond of Aunt Lydia's "Sceptre of Authority"- a self-contained toilet accesory with disturbingly phallic qualities which kept everyone laughing well into the wee hours. Bottoms up!

Etymology: RESURREct+reGALIA=RESURREGALIA.........RESURRECT:to bring to view, attention, or use again,to raise from the dead;back-formation from resurrection-1772......REGALIA:: the emblems, symbols, or paraphernalia indicative of royalty,decorations or insignia,special dress or trappings;Medieval Latin, from Latin, neuter plural of regalis-1540

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COMMENTS:

Re(as)suringly regal resurrection complete with elegant use of Latin. Very nice! - dochanne, 2008-12-16: 03:00:00

Brings back so many memories. I like it. - Mustang, 2008-12-16: 21:00:00

Good word...been there done that! - Nosila, 2008-12-16: 22:16:00

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Created by: mrowka

Pronunciation: Re-late-ment

Sentence: Before Aunt Patty came over, I had to find the proper relatement for her decoupage crockpot.

Etymology: Relation + Placement

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Created by: robohamster

Pronunciation: Beast-owal

Sentence: My aunt beastowed this moose sweater on me last Christmas.

Etymology:

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