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'Yes Boss, I am sick as a dog'

DEFINITION: v., To create the impression that you are deathly ill and represent a potentially lethal bio-hazard risk, so that your boss will ask you to "take the next couple of days off". n., A faked illness.

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Verboticisms

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Malaze

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: mall ayze

Sentence: The malaze she felt was at it's worst after her periodic binges on Gang's Beer and purple artichokes.

Etymology: malaise, laze

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COMMENTS:

Thank goodness I have today off, or I'd have to call in with malaze. That party last night was WILD! Ow. That typing hurt. Better head back to bed. - purpleartichokes, 2007-11-02: 07:42:00

Sounds like she's as "full as the carpet snake that swallowed the wallaby!" Wouldn't ave been the beer that made her crook; it ave been the purple artichokes,! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-11-04: 16:58:00

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Trake

Created by: FreakoSpeako

Pronunciation:

Sentence: I had to trake my boss today.

Etymology:

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Liaryngitis

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: liar/in/jy/tis

Sentence: He came down with a bad case of liaryngitis just in time for the baseball playoffs.

Etymology: laryngitis + liar

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle Great word! - libertybelle, 2007-11-02: 11:08:00

Excellent!! - Mustang, 2007-11-03: 00:00:00

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Fidochondria

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fy do kon dree a

Sentence: When Germaine Shepherd wants to have a mental health day at the beach from work, she comes down with a case of fidochondria. It scares her boss so bad, he gives her the rest of the week off. With her pug nose, poodle skirt, poochini bag,Afghan throw, pointy canine teeth, houndstooth coat and mutticulous timing, you'd think he'd have caught on by now when she plans to be sick as a dog...

Etymology: Fido (Latin for "I am faithful"...pet name for a dog) & Hypochondria (a patient with imaginary symptoms and ailments)

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COMMENTS:

artr Very good! - artr, 2012-11-09: 08:34:00

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Skypeochondria

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sky po kon dree ah

Sentence: Judy just could not face another Friday or Monday at her boring job, so she called her boss to beg off work. Judy suffers from skypeochondria and whether it is kneemonia, toelio, affluenza or another organ recital, she videos her dog's yucky mouth to show off her illness of the day. If her boss had a brain, he'd wonder at the sounds of seagulls and crashing waves in the background...

Etymology: Skype (video phone service) & Hypochondria (chronic and abnormal anxiety about imaginary symptoms and ailments)

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Phonease

Created by: KenM2

Pronunciation: fo-nease

Sentence: he called in with a severe case of the phonease

Etymology: a combination of phony+disease, and an additional play on words with "phone in"+"take it easy"

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Connedtagious

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Con-d-tay-jus

Sentence: When Neil heard the weather forecast for the next few days he hatched a plan that couldn't possibly fail. He used his kid's white face paints to make hiim look deathly pale and went into work moaning that he felt terrible, his boss took one look at him and fearing that he was connedtagious,, immediately told him to take a week off. As soon as Neil got home he washed off the paint and replaced it with suntan oil then poured himself a large drink and went into the garden to sunbathe for the rest of the day.

Etymology: Conned(to have deceived (someone) by lying) + Contagious(of a disease) spread by direct or indirect contact between people or organisms) = Connedtagious

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-10-01: 10:58:00

metrohumanx That Neil is MY kind of slacker. Buy him one on me. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-01: 13:33:00

Very clever. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-10-01: 18:14:00

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Fleasong

Created by: looseball

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Be at the beach in ten minutes honey,my boss bought the old fleasong.

Etymology:

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Pseudosymathogenipulate

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: soo-doe-sim-PATH-oh-jen-IP-yule-ate

Sentence: Jeff really liked his job. However, when the first pale greens of springtime burst gloriously from the earth, he unfailingly became bedridden with a mysterious PSEUDOSYMPATHOGEN. Folk wisdom decreed that the only effective treatment for this stubbornly quixotic malady was to CALL IN SICK. One could predict with certainty that when the first forsythia of April reared it's yellow head, Jeff would call the boss and PSEUDOSYMPATHOGENIPULATE her into granting him a "sick" day. Sick of working, perhaps - but not too ill to crawl to the park and ogle the rollerbladers who were basking in the shower of benign photons that heralded the first warm weekday and incidentally contributed to the spread of that productivity-killing practice known as PSEUDOSYMPATHOGENIPULATION. (cough cough) ....I may need another day...I'm still a bit under the weather.

Etymology: PSEUDO+SYMPathy+pATHOGEN+manIPULATE= PSEUDOSYMPATHOGENIPULATE .....PSEUDO:false.....SYMPATHY:an affinity, association, or relationship between persons or things; from Greek sympatheia, from sympathēs having common feelings.....PATHOGEN:a specific causative agent (as a bacterium or virus) of disease.....MANIPULATE:to manage or utilize skillfully b: to control or play upon by artful, unfair, or insidious means especially to one's own advantage;from French, from manipuler to handle an apparatus in chemistry, ultimately from Latin manipulus.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I love it when I come in on the 39th step, and then slowly rise in the rankings like a blob of rancid thirty weight.....only to bob just below the surface, colliding randomly with other verbotomists like viscous ectoplasm in an ancient lava lamp. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-01: 13:48:00

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Fauxmortitis

Created by: Kyoti

Pronunciation: Fohh-morr-TIE-tuhss

Sentence: Stanley smiled as his employee benefits rep tried to read his doctor's chicken scratch medical assessment, which was once again nothing more than a serious bout of Fauxmortitis that was easily taken care of with a prescribed round of golf in a neighboring county.

Etymology: Faux: fancy French word for "fake" + Mortis: fancy medical word for death + Itis: not-so-fancy suffix to imply a rampant breakout of whatever comes before it.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-02: 01:55:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram and svnfsvn. Thank you remistram and svnfsvn! ~ James'

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-02: 12:29:00
Thanks to everyone for joining me at our Blog Party yesterday to celebrate Verbotomy's first birthday. It was a lot of fun. Thanks! ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-03-01: 00:08:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram svnfsvn. Thank you remistram svnfsvn. ~ James