Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Technillogicrat
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: tech - nil - LODJ - uh - crat
Sentence: Having an overblown ego and chutzpah to match, Cranston was a technillogicrat in the extreme who would never admit ignorance but would always blame everyone and everything else for things he could not remedy.
Etymology: Blend of technical and illogic with suffix -crat...member of a dominant class
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COMMENTS:
great blend - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 14:05:00
There's a theme here, apparently we have all worked with these types... - Nosila, 2008-05-15: 01:53:00
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Userabuser
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: use/er/a/buse/er
Sentence: Our IT department specializes in the userabuser technique to solve most computer problems. It's the "It's got to be you' approach.
Etymology: user + abuse
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COMMENTS:
Must be included in their tech training classes... - Nosila, 2009-06-26: 12:37:00
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Developastard
Created by: scissorlips
Pronunciation: duh-vel-op-AHS-turd
Sentence: "It's crashing when I hit the spacebar!", screamed Ms. Yewser. "That's probably because you've damaged my software by mashing the return button one too many times!" was Arman Gheddon's reply. Being a developastard of considerably little patience, Arman then simply left her office.
Etymology: developer: as in, software developer + bastard: insulting term of address for people who are stupid or irritating or ridiculous.
Dissinformation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: disinfərmāshən
Sentence: Lawrence is quite sure of his programming skills. When something doesn’t work the way he expects, he is preemptively sure that it is caused by user error. He has been known to spread dissinformation, belittling anyone who would dare question his skills.
Etymology: diss (act or speak in a disrespectful way toward)+ misinformation (false or inaccurate information, esp. that which is deliberately intended to deceive)
Displaim
Created by: stache
Pronunciation: dĭ-splām'
Sentence: "Clearly user error." Gaylord concluded. "You simply can't correctly interface with the connection-oriented data access arrangement..." "Don't displaim me," Marta interrupted, "I only hit 'start' and the thing locked up."
Etymology: displacement, psychological defense mechanism that transfers affect or reaction from the original object to some more acceptable one; display, to output (data) on a CRT or other screen, or, in non-computer usage, to reveal or betray; aim, to intend or direct for a particular effect or purpose.
Culpabiligeek
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kulp a bili geek
Sentence: Michael was a culpabiligeek. Being a computer programmer elevated him to godly status in his own mind. Whenever a help call came in, he would sigh loudly,reluctantly step down from the sanctity of Mount Olympus (his dark hole of an office, where he lived in his own cyber universe) and deign to visit the offender. These mortal morons were always doing something stupid with their computers and he loved nothing better than blaming them for everything. And they were so stupid, they believed him. One day, he met his match. His company had hired a sassy girl with long blond hair and thick glasses called Phoebe to share his office and duties. He soon fell in love and married her, celebrating his own Big Fat Geek Wedding. Alas, it did not last long, as she too, tired of taking the blame for everything that went wrong. She ran off with a janitor named Mario and Michael was forced to live his own Geek Tragedy.
Etymology: culpability (deserving blame or censure as being wrong or evil or injurious) & geek ( a person with an unusual or odd personality;an expert in a technical field, particularly to do with computers)
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COMMENTS:
My favorite! Best describes the person I have to deal with. Thanks, Nosila. - purpleartichokes, 2008-05-14: 19:29:00
Cheers,purple, and welcome back...we missed you! - Nosila, 2008-05-14: 20:55:00
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Softwarrior
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /sawft-WOR-ee-er/
Sentence: Bert, the department's IT Specialist, was a fanatical softwarrior, who would attack any of the mere users who dared to question the quality of their software. He fancied himself a sort of cyber-paladin, defender of the virtuous programmers who constructed such intricate code. Of course, Bert was sure that he could have joined their ranks, and that the brotherhood of programmers would welcome him with open arms, but he believed that his calling was here, at the front lines, keeping the unappreciative and discontented mobs of peasants... er, users, at bay.
Etymology: Software - the programs used to direct the operation of a computer (back-formation from the word 'hardware' as applied to computer equipment) + Warrior - one who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity, cause, or conflict (from Old North French, werreieur "one who wages war")
Theebugger
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: dee buh gur
Sentence: Verily I say unto thee, if yon bugger of a theebugger shouldst approach thee, flee with the greatest urgency, lest he bug thee further.
Etymology: debug, bugger, thee
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COMMENTS:
your sentences always make me laugh - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 14:07:00
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Techsuppose
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose
Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.
Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely
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COMMENTS:
So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00
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Computerpogromer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kom pew ter po grom er
Sentence: Ivan the Terrible was the scourge of the Company because he ran his own personal little empire in the IT Dept. He terrorized the quasi-technical employees and carried out a reign of terror as a computerpogromer to the masses, making them fear turning on their computers each morning. Like all despots though, he was overthrown when the company outsourced his job overseas, in an effort to save money and lives.
Etymology: Computer Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)& Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group (especially Jews)
Mistech
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: mis tek
Sentence: Lech, our mistech, mistook a mistake that Missy would make. He would make her shake and quake, about her mistake, even when his take of her mistake was a flake. He could wreck the heck on her neck, if he we didn't keep our mistech in check.
Etymology: Mistake (error) & Tech (a technician who is highly proficient and enthusiastic about some technical field (especially computing)
Criticompados
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Krit-ee-komp-a-doss
Sentence: The criticompados was insistent that the blame lay with me, but I was sure I was not in the wrong, and he knew it!! He tried the same trick on my colleague only last week.
Etymology: Criti(Critisize,blame) comp(computer) dos(Disk operating system)
Macintoldyouso
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: mack-in-told-you-so
Sentence: "The debug error of your .doc file has corrupted .dll operating systembytes," said Herbert, the IT guy. "Sooooorry Mr. Macintoldyouso," I muttered under my breath.
Etymology: Macintosh+Told you so
Nincomputable
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: nin/com/pute/abul
Sentence: Our IT department always makes me feel like a nincomputable.
Etymology: nincompoop + computable
Progcastigator
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: prog/cass/ti/gay/tor
Sentence: Many software developers are progcastigators who put off reworking their programs and instead berate users.
Etymology: programmer + castigate (reprimand, berate) + procrastinator
Buggle
Created by: jrogan
Pronunciation: bug-gull
Sentence: Jonathan was a real buggle and depended on user feedback to make sure all his software worked as expected... Whatever they said he'd feed it back to them as user errors.
Etymology: bug + gle
Progrimist
Created by: arrrteest
Pronunciation: pro-grim-ist
Sentence: Victor the Progrimist was scheduled to do his rounds on the floor at 10:00 a.m. on Tuesdays. The employees all held a meeting to discuss what problems they had beforehand so they would be prepared for his sarcastic and abusive ways and attitude. They even took a poll to see who's problem would probably attract the most ire and ridicule from him. Every once in a while they would concoct a fake IT problem just to see him react if there was not many issues to discuss.
Etymology: Program + grim +ist
Blamebomb
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: blāmbäm
Sentence: When Jessica emailed a complaint about software developed by her company's software department, someone appeared at her cubicle almost immediately. After a couple of terse questions, he blamebombed her and huffed his way back to wherever it is these people hide out.
Etymology: blame (assign responsibility for a fault or wrong) + bomb (attack)
Technillogicrat
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: tech - neh - LODJ - uh - crat
Sentence: Having an overblown ego and chutzpah to match, Cranston was a technillogicrat in the extreme who would never admit ignorance but would always blame everyone and everything else for things he could not remedy.
Etymology: Blend of 'technical' and 'illogical' with suffix '-crat'...member of a dominant class
Pogrommer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: poe grom mer
Sentence: Gerd the Nerd, King of the Keys, WiFi Art Thou was on his usual grumpy morning rounds. It was always demeaning for a man of his superior intellect and obvious supreme being status to have to help the peons in data entry sort their miniscule problems. And so he conducted his morning pogrommer act, successfully designed to terrify and cower. But when he deigned to enter the murky waters of the call centre, he was blinded by the beauty of the end-user. She had long gold plaits and looked so helpless and vulnerable, so he went gently on her. He found himself thinking of her all day and dreamed that night that his Big Fat Geek Wedding would soon be a reality.
Etymology: Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group, in this case, blonde end-users) & Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)
Proctechnalgia
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: PROK-tek-nel-juh
Sentence: Bob, aka Cranston, was a technillogicrat whose proctechnalgia was the bane of all IT end-users.
Etymology: Blend of TECHNOLOGY, PROgram & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass.
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COMMENTS:
Blend of TECHNOLOGY & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:41:00
Oops! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:42:00
funny - you must have put this in very late - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 21:04:00
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Geekbugger
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: geek - bug - grrr
Sentence: Milton employed his own type of debugging....Instead of spending the arduous hours analyzing, tweaking and rerunning code to locate the errors in his software program; he tried to talk the users into living with it. He even acted as if they were somehow not using it correctly or just being troublesome. The users felt like Milton was the worst geekbugger they had ever met.
Etymology: debug (locate and correct errors in a computer program code), geek (An expert in a technical field, particularly to do with computers),bug (annoy, irritate; also a fault) bugger (a general-purpose expletive, used to imply dissatisfaction, or used to describe someone or something whose behaviour is in some way displeasing)
Softwarespecialass
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: soft ware spesh ial ass
Sentence: Hank's new income tax software’s many glitches prompted him to call technical support. However, the softwarespecialass maintained his program was flawless. He suggested Hank give the software another try while completing another random task, such as juggling oranges or counting sheep.
Etymology: From software specialist and ass.
Technoway
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: tek-no-way
Sentence: The office staff all called Hubert the tech 'technoway' for the way he tried to dismiss just about every service call by saying 'no way is this a computer error, it's operator error'.
Etymology: blend of technician and the phrase 'no way'
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COMMENTS:
Nice combo! - artr, 2009-06-26: 10:58:00
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Notit
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: nätit
Sentence: Whenever a computer problem is exposed Wendel sings out "Notit" much like a kid at the start of a game of tag. Of course when he said "it", he meant IT. Though he has never actually created a single usable document, spreadsheet or database, he just knows that any problem that pops up is the fault of the peons that work for his company. If only he could keep these knuckleheads from monkeying with his network... He would express his disdain in an e-mail if he could spell it.
Etymology: not (used with an auxiliary verb or “be” to form the negative) + it (pronoun [third person singular]) IT (Information Technology)
Geekjerk
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: geek-jerk - with contempt in the intonation
Sentence: That geekjerk needs to get some user experience training and some empathy before he starts work on his next program. Next time he comes near me he might be on the end of a knee jerk reaction.
Etymology: geek (member of the IT crowd) + jerk (someone who behaves badly)
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COMMENTS:
OOps a day late with this one. - petaj, 2008-05-15: 03:46:00
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Itsk
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: I-tisk
Sentence: When Susan's screen went black she dreaded having to call the crabby ITsk guy but she was stymied. The all-knowing geek strolled into the office with his short sleeved shirt, coffee cup and smarmy attitude, looked at the wall where someone had accdentally kicked out the plug. He stood there with the plug in his hand, tsking, then made a huge show of plugging it in. "Please check the plug before you call next time," he snarled, and wafted out of the office.
Etymology: IT: pronounced I - T is the acronym for Informational Technologist + Tsk: sucking sound used to express disappointment or sympathy.
Progcastigator
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: prog/cass/ti/gay/tor
Sentence: Many software developers are progcastigators who put off reworking their programs and instead berate users.
Etymology: programmer + castigate (reprimand, berate) + procrastinator
Computerpogrommer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: com pew ter po grom mer
Sentence: Java a minute to hear about the Computerpogrommer in our office? His name is Seymour Fawltz and his Modem Operandii is to belittle you in front of your peers and Excel at making you feel like an idiot about your inferior computer skills. It was by sheer chance that someone found out he had entered the local Click&Drag Queen Contest, under the name Ana Log Macintosh, a Domainatrix. Now he knows we know his secret, so his bark is not worse than his byte. We found his Encryptionite!
Etymology: Computer Progammer & Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group (in this case, non-Geeks)
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COMMENTS:
LOL! A great creation. - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:52:00
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Virtualtercation
Created by: bookowl
Pronunciation: vur/tu/al/tur/cay/shun
Sentence: I had a virtualtercation with IT today.
Etymology: virtual + altercation
Dikoder
Created by: Kallystie
Pronunciation: dik-oder
Sentence: Richard was berating Sally for crashing his flawless program. She insisted that it was not user-error, and that there had to be an issue with the code. He continued to be petulant, and finally Sally said, "Hey, stop being such a dikoder Richard!"
Etymology: Possibly a combination of British army slang for "male appendage" circa 1891 and the latin "codex", or book of laws.
Custoculpate
Created by: rebelvin
Pronunciation: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE
Sentence: His first reaction to any reported application problem is to custoculpate, not wanting to think the code could be incorrect, even when that has proven to be the case over and over.
Etymology: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE
Debugaboo
Created by: rombus
Pronunciation: dee - bug - ah - boo
Sentence: It was an exasperating debugaboo that the employees found themselves in. The front end application sometimes connected and sometimes did not. The programmer kept saying that the users were just not concentrating or had a bad work attitude when they could not connect.
Etymology: debug, bugaboo (source of concern, trickster or prankster)
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COMMENTS:
Dee Bootiful word! - Nosila, 2009-06-26: 12:41:00
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Comments:
Verbotomy - 2008-05-14: 00:03:02
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James
Verbotomy - 2009-06-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James
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