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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Urbean

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ur/bean

Sentence: John's attempt to be urbane, chivalrous, courteous, polite and just plain well-mannered became urbean when his head got jammed in the doorway helping a damsel in distress.

Etymology: URBEAN - noun - from URBANE (polite, refined and often elegant in manner) + MR. BEAN

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Behalfgaffe

Created by: Wordfanne

Pronunciation:

Sentence: When Roland stood up to allow a pregnant, fellow-bus-rider his seat, his behalfgaffe of stepping on another woman's skirt hem, pulling its waist to her knees, rather nullified his desired "effect".

Etymology:

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Chivalreeeeeeek

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: shiv al reeeeeeeeeek

Sentence: his act of chivalry turned into an act of chivalreeeeeeeek. He won't try that again without checking his flies

Etymology: chivalry eeeeek

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Failgesture

Created by: Kevicky50

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Harold tried to get close to Jessica by carrying her bags, but the failgesture only ended in breakage.

Etymology:

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Harmoanious

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: harm/o/nee/us

Sentence:

Etymology: harmonious + harm + maon

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Fewtility

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyoo til lit tee

Sentence: Fewbert's heroic gestures towards his fewture wife, Fewgenia, were often attempts in fewtility. Like when he placed his coat over a puddle in the street for her, only to discover that it actually covered an open manhole. Or when he chased her cat FewFew through hill & dale, caught it, was scratched to death and brought it home to her, only to find the real FewFew happily sitting in front of the hearth at home. Poor Fewbert, his fewtile efforts made Fewgenia think that a fewture with Fewbert might be fewtile, at least until after he passed fewberty.

Etymology: Few (an indefinite but relatively small number) & Futility (uselessness as a consequence of having no practical result)

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COMMENTS:

Beware the fewmious bandersnatch.... - Mustang, 2008-09-25: 00:02:00

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Oopdonk

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Oup-don-k

Sentence: In the parallel universe, Sir Walter wasn't so lucky. Having laid his cloak over a puddle for the Queen to step onto so that she wouldn't muddy her feet, little did he realise it was well over 3 metres deep ..."Oopdonk!" went the crowd.

Etymology: Oops - an expression of surprise or feeling sorry about a mistake or slight accident. Donk (onomatopoeia) - Comedic knocking noise.

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Missistance

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: mis-sis-tans

Sentence: When Cindy dropped her pencil Fred bent down to pick it up for her. The problem was that Cindy also bent to get it, and Fred ended up headbutting her in the nose. He's since learned not to offer his missistance to others.

Etymology: miss+assistance miss (To fail to accomplish or achieve) assistance (Aid, help)

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Clobbergest

Created by: Lidipop

Pronunciation: Klob-er-jess-t

Sentence: when i realized the good intention had gone badly, her "clobbergest" was just the begining of a series of unintentional punishments!!! :)

Etymology: Clobbering(to defeat overwhelmingly)+ gest/gesture(something said or done by way of formality or courtesy)= clobbergest

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COMMENTS:

petaj I was thinking also that a guest was being clobbered. - petaj, 2007-10-27: 02:02:00

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Goofinice

Created by: Chickp

Pronunciation: Goof-E-nice

Sentence: He was going to put his coat over the puddle when he goofiniced and stepped on his shoelace and landed in the puddle instead.

Etymology: Goof - to make a mistake, + nice - to be kind to another person.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James