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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Backsquire

Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: BAK-skwyre

Sentence: Alex, ever the backsquire, spread out his coat for his date to cross a puddle, only to put her in the way of the spray of a speeding car.

Etymology: backfire + squire (a gentleman)

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Urbean

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ur/bean

Sentence: John's attempt to be urbane, chivalrous, courteous, polite and just plain well-mannered became urbean when his head got jammed in the doorway helping a damsel in distress.

Etymology: urbane + Mr. Bean

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COMMENTS:

Would never have thought to go down the Mr. Bean road. Great word! - purpleartichokes, 2007-10-26: 19:01:00

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Shrivalry

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: sh riv al ree

Sentence: His attempt at chivalry quickly turned into shrivalry as the revolving crushed his pride and other more sentitive bits

Etymology: chivalry, shrivel

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COMMENTS:

ouch! - very funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-09-24: 13:15:00

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Stumbility

Created by: brimuth

Pronunciation: st-uhm-bil-itee

Sentence: The curse of stumbility struck again as Matt's efforts to be a gentleman failed miserably.

Etymology: The ability to stumble over the simplest gesture of chivalry.

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Missistance

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: mis-sis-tans

Sentence: When Cindy dropped her pencil Fred bent down to pick it up for her. The problem was that Cindy also bent to get it, and Fred ended up headbutting her in the nose. He's since learned not to offer his missistance to others.

Etymology: miss+assistance miss (To fail to accomplish or achieve) assistance (Aid, help)

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Jestugh

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Jess-t-ure

Sentence: Harry had fancied Suzie for ages, so when he saw that she was having troube starting her car he swiftly offered to help. He began push the car and soon got it going , unfortunately he pushed so hard that he fell over and landed headfirst in a muddy puddle. As he stood up all he could here was Suzie's hysterical laughter, it was a good thing that his face was covered in mud so that she could not see his embarrassment.

Etymology: Jest(Joke)+ Ugh(an exclamation of horror) = Jestugh (play on gesture)

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Benevoloser

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bənevəloōzər

Sentence: Despite his illusions, Charley is a benevoloser. When Cindy broke up with her boyfriend he envisioned himself as her knight in shining armor. He had her over for a gourmet meal where he started by spilling wine on her and ended by tripping and knocking her off her chair. Instead of sweeping her off her feet and winning her heart, he knocked her to the floor and sat on her spleen.

Etymology: benevolent (well meaning and kindly) + loser (failure)

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Etitwit

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: ed/i/twit

Sentence: Poor Eugene was always trying to gain points with the ladies. Unfortunately his attempts at opening doors, putting down his coat over puddles and the like, would always backfire. Instead of being known as the "knight in shining armor" of the apartment building, he was known as etitwit of the lobby.

Etymology: Etiquite: Rules of behavior, propriety, decorum, manners. Twit: A foolish or annoying person.

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Polchumpite

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: puhl-chuhmp-ahyt

Sentence: He wanted to offer his sobbing co-worker a tissue, and as he fumbled around to fetch one he mistakenly handed her his used up snot-ridden one thus adding himself to the roster of office polchumpites.

Etymology: polite + chump (as in oaf, klutz))

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Gomeresqe

Created by: svnfsvn

Pronunciation: based on gomer/homer

Sentence: I appeared gomeresge when my pants ripped during changing tire on freeway.

Etymology:

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James