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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Backsquire

Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: BAK-skwyre

Sentence: Alex, ever the backsquire, spread out his coat for his date to cross a puddle, only to put her in the way of the spray of a speeding car.

Etymology: backfire + squire (a gentleman)

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Majestiklutz

Created by: dredryder

Pronunciation:

Sentence: "It is a wonder he has any face left; he is so prone to majestiklution!"

Etymology: too obvious - "majestic" and "klutch" (a "klutz" who panics in a pinch)

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Banevolence

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: bain-ehv-oh-lence

Sentence: Thomas' banevolence was beginning to cost him. The proliferation of cuts, bruises and trips to the chiropractor was making him think that chivalry was going to get him dead.

Etymology: bane + (ben)evolence

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle Terrific word! - libertybelle, 2007-10-26: 11:10:00

good word MrDave - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-26: 12:19:00

Good word and antonym of benevolence! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:25:00

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Ineptsuavitis

Created by: mryder

Pronunciation: in-ept / swah-ve / itis

Sentence: Billy would have loved to open the door for the pretty girl; however his ineptsuavitis set in and he ended up getting himself trapped in the door.

Etymology: inept-ORIGIN originally in the sense unsuitable: from Latin ineptus, from in- ‘not’ + aptus ‘fitted. Suave-ORIGIN Latin suavis ‘agreeable’ itis (suffix)— ORIGIN from Greek -ites

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Jestugh

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Jess-t-ure

Sentence: Harry had fancied Suzie for ages, so when he saw that she was having troube starting her car he swiftly offered to help. He began push the car and soon got it going , unfortunately he pushed so hard that he fell over and landed headfirst in a muddy puddle. As he stood up all he could here was Suzie's hysterical laughter, it was a good thing that his face was covered in mud so that she could not see his embarrassment.

Etymology: Jest(Joke)+ Ugh(an exclamation of horror) = Jestugh (play on gesture)

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Magnanimistake

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: magnanimous-take

Sentence: Sir Galahazard sprawled clumsily under the portcullis after tripping over his sword in his hurry to bow as low as he could. His reputation for magnanimistakes travelled before him so there was a first aid officer on hand to receive him.

Etymology: magnanimous, revealing generosity or nobility + mistake, an error or fault (Galahad, known for his chivalry + galah, a term of endearment in Australia for a fool named after a type of parrot + hazard, a danger)

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COMMENTS:

A knight in shining harmour - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-26: 12:08:00

petaj The only health insurance available was through MEDI-e-val. Which was unfortunate because Galahazard was there to crown the king. But if there was any danger to the king there were plenty of guards armed with mace to subdue his overexcitable gallantry. Guinefear had become very cautious around him. - petaj, 2007-10-27: 02:09:00

The noble knight seems a little odd but very obliging. Nice word! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:42:00

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Flubanthropy

Created by: zavijava

Pronunciation:

Sentence: His act of flubanthropy not only resulted in a wet coat, it sent her to the emergency room with a sprained ankle.

Etymology: flub+philanthropy

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Benefracture

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: ben-uh-FRAK-cher

Sentence: Roxie was a tender-hearted tryplease, who sincerely shambled her way through life. And though her intentions remained pure and noble, her saintretemps and benefractures were often plain scary. In the end, to kin and kith alike, she became a must-to-avoid.

Etymology: Benefracture: blend of benefactor & fracture - " when good intentions comes apart or unstuck." Saintretemps: blend of saint & contretemps-"hitch"

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COMMENTS:

Sweet word OZZIEBOB! You long time-verbotomists are really creative with your words. For me, its hard to stay away from the thesaurus! - Kevcom, 2007-10-28: 00:23:00

I did this one time -- A female coworker dropped a paper by the printer and, trying to be gentlemanly, I quickly bent down to grab it (as she was also) and 'benefractured' her glasses. :/ - Tigger, 2007-11-06: 17:41:00

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Missistance

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: mis-sis-tans

Sentence: When Cindy dropped her pencil Fred bent down to pick it up for her. The problem was that Cindy also bent to get it, and Fred ended up headbutting her in the nose. He's since learned not to offer his missistance to others.

Etymology: miss+assistance miss (To fail to accomplish or achieve) assistance (Aid, help)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James