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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Oopdonk

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Oup-don-k

Sentence: In the parallel universe, Sir Walter wasn't so lucky. Having laid his cloak over a puddle for the Queen to step onto so that she wouldn't muddy her feet, little did he realise it was well over 3 metres deep ..."Oopdonk!" went the crowd.

Etymology: Oops - an expression of surprise or feeling sorry about a mistake or slight accident. Donk (onomatopoeia) - Comedic knocking noise.

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Fewtility

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyoo til lit tee

Sentence: Fewbert's heroic gestures towards his fewture wife, Fewgenia, were often attempts in fewtility. Like when he placed his coat over a puddle in the street for her, only to discover that it actually covered an open manhole. Or when he chased her cat FewFew through hill & dale, caught it, was scratched to death and brought it home to her, only to find the real FewFew happily sitting in front of the hearth at home. Poor Fewbert, his fewtile efforts made Fewgenia think that a fewture with Fewbert might be fewtile, at least until after he passed fewberty.

Etymology: Few (an indefinite but relatively small number) & Futility (uselessness as a consequence of having no practical result)

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COMMENTS:

Beware the fewmious bandersnatch.... - Mustang, 2008-09-25: 00:02:00

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Assistocramp

Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation:

Sentence: That girl was so hot that I had an assistocramp and shut her purse in the car door.

Etymology: assistance + cramp

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Genteelgaffe

Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation:

Sentence: If it wasn't for his genteelgaffe, she might have spoken to him.

Etymology:

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Jobole

Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: JA-BOWL

Sentence: As Dan had been planning for months, he finally decided to take his chance when suddenly he got his neck caught in the dore, all the while while jaboling Diane.

Etymology:

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Doomerang

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: doōmərang

Sentence: Wendel tried once again to do the gracious thing. As he attempted to help an older woman carry a heavy bag of groceries to her car only to trip and scatter the contents across the pavement. He would have stayed and helped her clean up the mess but she seemed much more intent on beating him with her cane than retrieving her broken eggs. Once again he found himself to be an expert at creating doomerangs, those deeds that always find a way to come back and boot you in the seat.

Etymology: doom (death, destruction, or some other terrible fate) + boomerang (a curved flat piece of wood that can be thrown so as to return to the thrower)

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COMMENTS:

great sentence - bookowl, 2008-09-24: 13:44:00

Nice word - OZZIEBOB, 2008-09-25: 18:21:00

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Fauxcilitation

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: (n.) fō-sĭl'ĭ-tā'shən; (tr. v.) fō-sĭl'ĭ-tāt'

Sentence: Henri's poor reflexes and terrible eyesight usually turn his eager attempts to help his friends into nightmarish and dangerous moments of fauxcilitation which usually finish up at the local emergency room.

Etymology: Faux = from faux pas = blunder + [fac]ilitation = The act of making easy or easier.

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COMMENTS:

A shade of meaning might include a subconscious lack of desire to actually help out, which might lead to a purposeful poor or "fake" ("faux") effort to assist. - milorush, 2007-10-26: 07:04:00

A shade of meaning might include a subconscious lack of desire to actually help out, which might lead to a purposefully poor or "fake" ("faux") effort to assist. - milorush, 2007-10-26: 07:05:00

Interesting and good blend! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:28:00

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Shrivelry

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: shriv el ree

Sentence: When he got caught twice in the revolving door after allowing his date to go through first, Lance A. Lott experienced the agony of shrivelry. Once a knight is enough.

Etymology: Shrivel (to wither;decrease in size,range or extent) & Chivalry (gallantry,courtesy,medieval principles of knighthood)

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Clobbergest

Created by: Lidipop

Pronunciation: Klob-er-jess-t

Sentence: when i realized the good intention had gone badly, her "clobbergest" was just the begining of a series of unintentional punishments!!! :)

Etymology: Clobbering(to defeat overwhelmingly)+ gest/gesture(something said or done by way of formality or courtesy)= clobbergest

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COMMENTS:

petaj I was thinking also that a guest was being clobbered. - petaj, 2007-10-27: 02:02:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James