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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Zeable

Created by: KenM2

Pronunciation: zea-bull

Sentence: Nice zeabull you pulled back there, wonder if you should have offered to pick up the old lady you dropped while helping her to cross the street.

Etymology: Zeal+Stumble

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Fewtility

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyoo til lit tee

Sentence: Fewbert's heroic gestures towards his fewture wife, Fewgenia, were often attempts in fewtility. Like when he placed his coat over a puddle in the street for her, only to discover that it actually covered an open manhole. Or when he chased her cat FewFew through hill & dale, caught it, was scratched to death and brought it home to her, only to find the real FewFew happily sitting in front of the hearth at home. Poor Fewbert, his fewtile efforts made Fewgenia think that a fewture with Fewbert might be fewtile, at least until after he passed fewberty.

Etymology: Few (an indefinite but relatively small number) & Futility (uselessness as a consequence of having no practical result)

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COMMENTS:

Beware the fewmious bandersnatch.... - Mustang, 2008-09-25: 00:02:00

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Urbean

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ur/bean

Sentence: John's attempt to be urbane, chivalrous, courteous, polite and just plain well-mannered became urbean when his head got jammed in the doorway helping a damsel in distress.

Etymology: urbane + Mr. Bean

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COMMENTS:

Would never have thought to go down the Mr. Bean road. Great word! - purpleartichokes, 2007-10-26: 19:01:00

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Gallnerdant

Created by: looseball

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After that gallnerdant attempt,I dipped my head an ran.

Etymology:

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Polchumpite

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: puhl-chuhmp-ahyt

Sentence: He wanted to offer his sobbing co-worker a tissue, and as he fumbled around to fetch one he mistakenly handed her his used up snot-ridden one thus adding himself to the roster of office polchumpites.

Etymology: polite + chump (as in oaf, klutz))

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Stumbility

Created by: brimuth

Pronunciation: st-uhm-bil-itee

Sentence: The curse of stumbility struck again as Matt's efforts to be a gentleman failed miserably.

Etymology: The ability to stumble over the simplest gesture of chivalry.

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Chivalrust

Created by: Kyoti

Pronunciation: Shiv-all-ruhst

Sentence: Barry's attempt to impress Deanna by juggling chocolate Valentine's hearts not only failed to ignite her interest, but underscored how deeply he suffered from chronic chivalrust.

Etymology: Chivalrous: gallant gesturing + rust: worn from misuse or lack of use.

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Missistance

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: mis-sis-tans

Sentence: When Cindy dropped her pencil Fred bent down to pick it up for her. The problem was that Cindy also bent to get it, and Fred ended up headbutting her in the nose. He's since learned not to offer his missistance to others.

Etymology: miss+assistance miss (To fail to accomplish or achieve) assistance (Aid, help)

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Recomime

Created by: Kevcom

Pronunciation: rea-ko-meeme

Sentence: Danny shot a helpful recomime to the old lady waiting on the subway platform at Glencairn, Glencairn station, but was unfortunately left behind and delayed by the slowness of the old lady, and by the speed at which the doors open and close on the rocket.

Etymology: recoil + pantomime

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James