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'Well Doc, will I ever be young again?'

DEFINITION: v. To spend years and years wishing you could be young again, only to discover that it's actually happening, but not exactly as you imagined. n. The fear the you are getting so old that people will start treating you like a baby

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Verboticisms

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Tomandjerryatrics

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: tom and jer ree at rix

Sentence: Thomas & Gerald were twin brothers who raised hell in their youth;had successful careers;raised families;outlived their spouses and now lived in the Ilk of Amnesia Nursing Home. They were now living the lives of tomandjerryatrics.

Etymology: Tom & Jerry (cartoon series about Tom Cat & Jerry Mouse;a commonplace phrase for youngsters indulging in riotous behaviour in 19th-century London) & Geriatrics (branch of medicine devoted to the aged and their illnesses)

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Youthdecay

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: yooth-duh-kay

Sentence: Grandpa was suffering from youthdecay, which was causing a severe case of glumdisease

Etymology: youth, decay, tooth decay

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COMMENTS:

petaj That can have nasty complications with longperiodontitis. - petaj, 2007-06-21: 03:50:00

A cavortee is fairly unlikely, i suppose - galwaywegian, 2007-06-21: 06:16:00

No doubt he'd eventually develop gingivigoritis. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-21: 08:05:00

Not if he uses youthwash. - Clayton, 2007-06-21: 09:43:00

maybe an orthodontryst with some dental floosie would help - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-21: 10:42:00

Sounds like orally good time. - Clayton, 2007-06-21: 11:13:00

(insert oral roberts joke here). - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-21: 11:24:00

Very well. Grandpa had to settle for oral, because he left his roberts at home. - Clayton, 2007-06-21: 20:13:00

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Methuselize

Created by: pungineer

Pronunciation: meth/thooz/al/eyes

Sentence: Henry felt as fit as a fiddle, since retiring he had taken up hangliding, white water rafting and book keeping, he felt as young as a kitten. His wife felt like she was going through a strange second stage of motherhood as she was keeping Henry in adult incontinence drawers so he could do all his activities with confidence... Her health care provider told her it was a classic case of methuselism.

Etymology: Methuselah - really old fictional character + ise - overused verbotomy suffix thanks for Ozziebob's inspiritional sentence...

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-14: 12:25:00

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Dependaby

Mrgoodtimes

Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: dah - pend - ay - bee

Sentence: Old Tom loved most aspects of growing old, more time with family, playing golf, long walks with no destination, if only he could stop the dependaby transformation.

Etymology: Depends (diapers) - baby (infant), antonym of dependable

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Oldzheimers

hooterbug

Created by: hooterbug

Pronunciation: olts′hī′mərz

Sentence: Grampa James was slowly developing a case of Oldsheimer's. Young Cindy listened to him as he spoke to her about how much he used to love cannonballing in the community pool when he was a boy. "You know, Cindy- Gramps might just have 1 or 2 more jumps in me left...You wanna run outside to the pool?" Little Cindy was speechless and didnt know what to reply. "Aw c'mon Cindy, I've got that warm feeling I used to get when I jumped into a nice warm pool!" Thankfully, Young Cindy's mom interrupted and said, "Oh no you don't...someone made a stinky!"

Etymology: Blend of "Old" + "Altzheimer's"

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Unexretrospect

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: un-ex-RETro-SPECT

Sentence: Gloria was a renowned unexretrospectologist who had spent years and years researching a cure for the disorder in hopes of preventing it affecting her. However, it had happened anyway. She now could do cartwheels on a balance beam in a tiny pink leotard, albeit with arthritic bent knees, false teeth flying out of her mouth and flabby arms akimbo.

Etymology: unexpected + retrospections (in the noun form of the word, suffix eon is used in place of the usual ion to represent the years and years)

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COMMENTS:

A retrospectorant might cure that. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-21: 07:28:00

Or a night on the town with a retrosexual. - Clayton, 2007-06-21: 09:45:00

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Geriatricks

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: jerry/a/triks

Sentence: Geriatricks is a miserable joke played on people in the prime of life

Etymology: geriatrics + tricks

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Youthanasia

Created by: Osomatic

Pronunciation: youth + an + azh + ah

Sentence: Heck, I don't remember that, I've been undergoing youthanasia.

Etymology: Well, we've all heard about Ponce deLeon and his fountain of youth, maybe this is it!

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Aberrajuvenize

Created by: Foghawk

Pronunciation: uh-BEAR-uh-joo-ven-ize

Sentence: Martin had the meaning of "careful what you wish for" driven home to him quite forcefully when a boring but admittedly good life in the retirement home was suddenly switched with painful hours in a seedy daycare after, one week in late December, he abruptly aberrajuvenized.

Etymology: From "aberrant" and the Latin root "juvenis", denoting youth.

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Doddler

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dädlər

Sentence: LLoyd may be retired but he is still very active. He is part of a group that power walks the local shopping mall each morning. He hates it when he gets stuck behind a doddler.

Etymology: dodder (tremble or totter, typically because of old age) + toddler (a young child who is just beginning to walk)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-06-21: 01:38:00
Today's definition was inspired by Robert J. Sawyer's Rollback, and the never-ending search for the magic pill that will make you young again. The funny thing is that when the rejuvenation does happen in the real world, it's usually a disaster -- and a source for inspiration. Thanks Rob! ~ James

ivonce - 2008-08-18: 09:40:00
cool