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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Communicache

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke

Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.

Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)

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Jabberflossy

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Jab-ber-floss-ee

Sentence: The dental nurse yanked the tape from the spool and pulling it taut, sliced down into Dick's incisors, grinning as she sawed to-and-fro. He could taste the blood from his gums running down into the back of his mouth. "One, two! One, two! And through and through the vorpal floss went snicker-snack! She left him dead, and with his head she went galumphing back". As the jabberflossy flowed so did the puddle beneath Dick's seat ...

Etymology: Jabber - To talk rapidly, unintelligibly, or idly. Floss - dental floss

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Drivelish

Created by: Boomertoo

Pronunciation:

Sentence: The dental staff's drivelish did not distract him from anxiously awaiting the procedure.

Etymology:

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Faqsdicine

vmalcolm

Created by: vmalcolm

Pronunciation: /fæksdsin/

Sentence: While she was attending him, she engaged in a little faqsdicine to relax him a bit.

Etymology: FAQSDICINE. From FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions) + Medicine (the science which relates to the prevention, cure, or alleviation of disease)

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Antiease

Created by: FayeWord

Pronunciation: an-ti-ease

Sentence: The obgyn's kind and gentle words before the examination were all antiease.

Etymology: Against feeling at ease.

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Qandaches

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kew and ayks

Sentence: Dr. Yvonne is one multi-tasking dentist. She can mask up, get both fists in your mouth simultaneously, probe and scrape and poke and pull and all the while, ask what you thought about medical/political/societal and philosophical issues, while giving you the benefit of her own thoughts on each topic and understanding your feeble, numb, unintelligible answers. At the same time, she gives verbal notes to her dental assistant for your file, as she tells her what she needs next and calculates your bill and how much your insurance will pay for each treatment. Yes, she has QandAches down to a fine science. No wonder they call her Leader of the Plaque!

Etymology: Q and A (Questions and Answers)& Aches (a dull persistent (usually moderately intense) pain; be the source of pain;feel physical pain)

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Distromain

Created by: lauren

Pronunciation: dis/tro/main

Sentence:

Etymology: dist ffrom distract, rom from 'from', and ain from pain.

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Obligastory

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: oh/blig/a/storee

Sentence: Every six months I am muzzled and forced to listen to the dentist's obligastory about his three sons - almost as boring as his drill.

Etymology: obligatory + story

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Afflictscussion

Created by: amandaprater

Pronunciation: uh-flixs-cuss-shun

Sentence: As the dentist poked around in the patients mouth, he asked the patient about his family. The afflictscussion was obvious as he tried to answer.

Etymology:

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Denalangage

Created by: kimbo123

Pronunciation: denal-langage

Sentence: With her mouth open wide, she tried to learn the denalangage.

Etymology:

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James