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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Eloquesia

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: ello-QWEE-shuh

Sentence: Dr. Lonnigan's eloquesia wasn't putting Harry at ease. In fact, his muttercal [filtered through medical apparatus] responses were painful to make and - to his ears - unintelligible.

Etymology: Eloqu(ence) + (anesth)esia EDIT: it occured to me that the word Queasy is sort of in there. I know I get a little queasy when the doctor starts talking to me.

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COMMENTS:

Will Doc Lonegan's eloquesia, cause Harry to have alopecia?! Great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-16: 23:02:00

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Prostagrabgab

Created by: aayeye

Pronunciation: prŏs'tĭ-'grăb-găb

Sentence: Dr. Stinky would not shut up during my prostate exam. He definately has the gift of prostagrabgab.

Etymology: Postate+grab= prostate exam gab= chit chat during said exam

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Talktomedochomy

Created by: svnfsvn

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Talktomedochomy and novacaine were needed to complete procedure.

Etymology:

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Obligastory

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: oh/blig/a/storee

Sentence: Every six months I am muzzled and forced to listen to the dentist's obligastory about his three sons - almost as boring as his drill.

Etymology: obligatory + story

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Dentachatter

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dentachatər

Sentence: To avoid the dentachatter Ron would sometimes pretend to doze off. Even when he flinched the dentist allowed him to continue the ruse.

Etymology: dental (of or relating to the teeth) + chatter (talk rapidly or incessantly about trivial matters)

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Docquisition

Created by: zavijava

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After checking my chart, the gynocologist began the docquisition.

Etymology: doctor+inquisition

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COMMENTS:

petaj Could almost be a tax audit. - petaj, 2007-10-16: 09:04:00

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Stumblemumble

Created by: sarabriggs

Pronunciation: stum-ble-mum-ble

Sentence: this situation couldn't be any worse because you have at least twenty fingers in your mouth, including grinding power tools that cant touch your toungue. so talking in the back of your throat is all that can really go on. maybe you should become a ventriliquist and learn how to speak correctly without moving your lips. stumble and mumble over all the words you can get out you ventriliquist you.

Etymology:

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Eyedoangiveashitchat

Created by: Lolagrrl

Pronunciation: Eye-doan-give-ay-shit-chat

Sentence: The two convention-goers made eyedoangiveashitchat while waiting for the elevator to take them to Karaoke night at the hotel's fireside lounge. Neither were enriched by the experience

Etymology: The name says it all... ;-)

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COMMENTS:

Btw: I consider singing Karaoke at a Hotel lounge to be an intimate, awkward AND painful procedure. ;D - Lolagrrl, 2007-10-18: 15:31:00

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Zideronker

Created by: Nickvoreas

Pronunciation: Zid-er-onk-er

Sentence: the zideronkerist dentist continued to talk to her patient even while she stuffed his mouth full of tools.

Etymology:

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Anesthymology

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Uh-nes-thym-ology

Sentence: The dentist absentmindedly practiced anesthymology when he attempted to distract his patients while he worked.

Etymology: Anesthesia- ology

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James