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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Unnecesspeak

Created by: scrabbelicious

Pronunciation: Un-ne-ciss-speak

Sentence: I longed for a speedy outcome which I knew was unlikely due to a constant barrage of unnecesspeak.

Etymology: Unnecessary Speak.

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Talktomedochomy

Created by: svnfsvn

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Talktomedochomy and novacaine were needed to complete procedure.

Etymology:

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Qandaches

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kew and ayks

Sentence: Dr. Yvonne is one multi-tasking dentist. She can mask up, get both fists in your mouth simultaneously, probe and scrape and poke and pull and all the while, ask what you thought about medical/political/societal and philosophical issues, while giving you the benefit of her own thoughts on each topic and understanding your feeble, numb, unintelligible answers. At the same time, she gives verbal notes to her dental assistant for your file, as she tells her what she needs next and calculates your bill and how much your insurance will pay for each treatment. Yes, she has QandAches down to a fine science. No wonder they call her Leader of the Plaque!

Etymology: Q and A (Questions and Answers)& Aches (a dull persistent (usually moderately intense) pain; be the source of pain;feel physical pain)

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Yackattack

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: YAK-uh-tak

Sentence: When Bertrand went in for his dental appointments he knew he was going to be bombarded with a yackattack from the dentist who never seemed to run out of inane questions and commments.

Etymology: Blend of 'yack' (Prolonged, sometimes senseless talk; chatter) and 'attack' (to set about (a task) or go to work on (a thing) vigorously)

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Speakuneasy

Created by: KenM2

Pronunciation:

Sentence: as soon as the dentist placed the the drill in my mouth he started his speakuneasy.

Etymology: speak and uneasy

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Whynecology

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: wi/neck/ol/ojee

Sentence: It's bad enough for us ladies to endure what we do annually. Would it be too much to ask that we don't have to also engage in meaningless whynecology?

Etymology: Why? Why, oh why????????? :) and Gynecology

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Prostagrabgab

Created by: aayeye

Pronunciation: prŏs'tĭ-'grăb-găb

Sentence: Dr. Stinky would not shut up during my prostate exam. He definately has the gift of prostagrabgab.

Etymology: Postate+grab= prostate exam gab= chit chat during said exam

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Faqsdicine

vmalcolm

Created by: vmalcolm

Pronunciation: /fæksdsin/

Sentence: While she was attending him, she engaged in a little faqsdicine to relax him a bit.

Etymology: FAQSDICINE. From FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions) + Medicine (the science which relates to the prevention, cure, or alleviation of disease)

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Ciadle

Created by: kenzieg

Pronunciation: see-addle

Sentence: Stop trying to ciadle with me.

Etymology: none

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Sedababble

Created by: tdhall56

Pronunciation: SED a bab bul

Sentence: Dr. House failed the class "Sedababble 101" in med school.

Etymology: sed(ative) babble

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James