Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: owch pot ay to

Sentence: Dudley Dolittle was admitted to the ER with life-threatening (in his mind)injuries. He was innocently lying on the couch, watching Law & Order Special Victims Unit at 3:00 pm, just before The Office came on in double episode at 4:00 pm. When all of a sudden the remote fell on the floor. He reached over to grab it and fell off the couch, hitting his head and temporarily knocking himself out. When he regained conciousness, he got up off the floor to go look in the mirror at any possible bruises. Unfortunately, the cat had knocked over a vase filled with flowers and water and he slipped on the hardwood floor. When the ambulance came, Dudley was in major pain. Turns out he'd wrenched his back, broke his ankle and wrist. He'd turned from a Couchpotato into an Ouchpotato. Later, when asked what caused his injury, he was able to truthfully tell people that while on an undercover assignment, he was attacked when a wild cat hit him in his sweet peas, on his way to The Office. Sadly, he was believed...

Etymology: Ouch (hurt;wound;exclamation used to express pain) & Couch Potato (an idler who spends much time on a couch (usually watching television)

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Created by: bdraffen0002

Pronunciation: /ˈskôfəl/

Sentence: I pulled my back when I got in a scoffle with my phone, I was trying to plug it in under the counter without it turning on.

Etymology: Scoff: late 18th century (as a verb): originally a variant of Scots and dialect scaff . The noun is from Afrikaans schoff, representing Dutch schoft ‘quarter of a day,’ (by extension) ‘meal.’ and Scuffle late 16th century (as a verb): probably of Scandinavian origin; compare with Swedish skuffa ‘to push’; related to shove and shuffle.

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kôfrakchərd

Sentence: Jimmy doesn’t really want to talk about his latest injury. Apparently he is embarrassed that he coughractured his finger while picking his nose.

Etymology: cough (expel air from the lungs with a sudden sharp sound) + fratcured (the cracking or breaking of a hard object or material)

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: ack-said-in-tear-ree

Sentence: The first thing Robert noticed when he regained consciousness after the accedentary was that he had lost the race. Then he noticed the large glinting shards of the glass coffee table, reflecting images of tiny go-carts zooming past an imaginary camera. He slowly righted himself, his face crusted in blood and glass. There on the screen, displayed in repeating 1080p glory was the turn on Koopa Troopa Beach where he had lost the entire affair. Upon hitting the shortcut ramp dead on and rocketing into the dank tunnel, his excitement overwhelmed him, and with his hands thrust toward the heavens, mocking Zeus with his three-proged controller like a vengeful Poseidon brandishing his trident, he knew he alone reigned over this beach. Every crab and palm tree must now pay fealty to his awesome might. He triggered his stored lightning item for effect and basked in the power. And that was when he had the stroke.

Etymology: accident + sedentary

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-15: 10:49:00

Great story - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:52:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: freek-seh-dent

Sentence: Being a wholly uncoordinated and clumsy oaf, Manfred seems to suffer one freaccident after another, goofy injuries that for anyone else would be very rare.

Etymology: Blend of 'freak' (A thing or occurrence that is markedly unusual or irregular) and 'accident' (an unforeseen and unplanned mishap)

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Created by: queenjane75

Pronunciation: said-en-jury

Sentence: It was a rather confusing case for the public, but in the end both suicide and murder were ruled out as the cause of the bloody scene. According to the autopsy report, it was a rare, mortal sedenjury caused by an all-too-full exploding can of beer that did Bob in. Who knew couch-surfing could be so dangerous?

Etymology: Sedentary+Injury=sedenjury

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: som/no/lem/demic

Sentence: A somnolemdemic experiences injuries caused by twisted sheets and bed bugs.

Etymology: somnolent (asleep) + endemic

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Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: ax-e-dumb

Sentence: After tying my shoes, I stood up too fast and got an accidumb as my leg cramped up.

Etymology: accident+dumb

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: sha-GRIN-jry

Sentence: Elwood suffered yet another chagrinjury when he got his finger caught in the whisk attachment on his mixer, jerked the mixer off the counter wherein it fell on his toes, and while dancing about in pain knocked himself senseless when his head whacked into the open cupboard door.

Etymology: Blend of 'chagrin' (a feeling of vexation, marked by disappointment or humiliation) and 'injury'

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COMMENTS:

What a klutz! Good one. - Nosila, 2009-06-01: 14:37:00

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: ooh-burr-klutz

Sentence: I pulled a real uberklutz when I pulled my back tying my shoes.

Etymology: uber+klutz

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