Verboticisms

Created by: diyan627

Pronunciation: dooo fus jer eee

Sentence: Fredliek's latest doofusjury involved his computer crashing while he was talking on his cell phone. We're not quite sure what happened. And he probably isn't either unless it's so traumatic (or embarrassing) that he doesn't want to give us details.

Etymology: doofus (incompetent, foolish person) + injury

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COMMENTS:

Good word. - Mustang, 2008-04-16: 05:14:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: orto-BASH-full

Sentence: "Have you been in a car accident?" she asked on seeing the family with plaster casts, limps and bruises. Autobashfully he replied, "no we were just having a cup of tea on the verandah when the kids called the dog and it came charging up, knocking me off my seat. I stood up pushing the table back and it fell through the decking and down went the rest of the family too".

Etymology: auto (self) + bash (hit hard) + bashful (embarrassed)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mort - iff - im - payrd

Sentence: Morton was completely mortifimpaired, suffering both injury and embarrassment at his being wheelchair bound thru an injury acquired during foolish horseplay.

Etymology: Blend of mortified and impaired.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: zip lash

Sentence: When Henry accidentally caught himself in the fly of his pants(ouch), he jerked his head down so quickly to see what he had done, that he gave himself ziplash.

Etymology: Zip (zipper, fly, fastener of clothing) & Whiplash (an injury to the neck as a result of rapid acceleration or deceleration)

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: som/no/lem/demic

Sentence: A somnolemdemic experiences injuries caused by twisted sheets and bed bugs.

Etymology: somnolent (asleep) + endemic

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: in - jur - eees

Sentence: Judy had a new injurease. She sprained her arm when she reached into the refrigerator to get the orange juice. It seemed that it hurt just to be alive.

Etymology: injury, ease

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COMMENTS:

Makes you want to avoid orange juice. Evil orange juice. - artr, 2009-06-01: 05:22:00

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Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: ahyd-l-joor, ahyd-l-joor-ee

Sentence: How I managed to idlejure both my legs while folding laundry I'll never understand, but I guess that's the nature of idlejuries. One minute you're standing there minding your own business, the next you're in a body cast!

Etymology: idle + injure

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: dough-maim

Sentence: Willard became king of his domaim when he slipped on wet linoleum on the way to his porcelin throne. Embarassed to admit the true cause of his injury, he quickly fabricated a more exciting story so his friends wouldn't think he was a complete idiot.

Etymology: domain: territory, environment, kingdom + maim: to injure, wound, disable

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ad-vert-eh-dent

Sentence: You would think Roger would have been better served if he had stayed in bed this morning. Or perhaps that wouldn't have mattered either. That is because Roger was a schlemiel. It seemed as if every normal everyday thing he did, he got injured. He was so clumsy that the he didn't have to show his insurance card at the local hospital. In fact, the emergency room looked more like the bar at Cheers whenever he was rolled in for some inadvertadent, real or imagined. They couldn't wait to hear what mundane activity happened this time. Would it be his toothbrush needing to be removed from deep within his nasal cavity, like the last time he came? There was a running bet within the facility.

Etymology: inadvertent, not attentive; heedless + accident, something that happens by chance, mishap

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COMMENTS:

Haven't we all known guys like Roger...good story. - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:44:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: harm ill ee ate

Sentence: Stanley felt like he was born with a large "L" for Loser on his forehead. No one could harmiliate themself the way he could. He had lost every job he had ever worked at and injured himself over and over in the process. Like the time he got 3rd degree burns working at a fast food place, bobbing for French fries. Or the time he crashed his taxi cab by backing up at great speed into the police car that had pulled him over for speeding. The impact had caused him to crack his nose open on his own steering wheel and get 2 black eyes. Or the time he was sitting on the glass of the office photocopier to copy his bare bum, when the glass shattered and splintered into his flesh. Or the time he had worked at the bowling alley and got his fingers stuck in the holes of the ball that he was demonstrating for some kids. He went flying down the alley and into the pinsetter machine. He now knew where the terms "spare tire","gutter mouth", "pins & needles" and "split lip" came from. Yes, Stanley spent so much time at the local emergency room, that the staff had bought him his own coffee mug, just so they could take turns cracking up over his incident reports. But all that was about to change. Stanley had been hired to do his dream job. No more harmiliation for him...it would be someone else's turn. Yes, Stanley had been hired as a consultant for the Workers Compensation Board!

Etymology: harm (any physical damage to the body caused by violence or accident or fracture etc. or the act of damaging something or someone) & humiliate (cause to feel shame; hurt the pride of or embarrass)

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COMMENTS:

Yes, but will Stanley now get a paper cut on his eye, stab himself with stapler, or even smash his finger on the copy machine lid? - pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:17:00

Most likely given his track record...I forgot about the time he worked at the butchers and accidentally backed up into the meat grinder, which made him get a little behind in his work...Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:41:00

Good one! - Mustang, 2008-04-16: 05:15:00

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