Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ek/ses/ser/size

Sentence: In spring to rid of the winter lard, people tend to excessercise themselves into sore muscles, joints and injuries.

Etymology: excess + exercise

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COMMENTS:

Good one. - Mustang, 2009-06-19: 03:03:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit - nus - slump

Sentence: Edgar had every intention of quickly regaining muscle tone and getting back on the conditioning routine but found he'd experienced a major fitnesslump and decided to forget the whole thing and return to his couch.

Etymology: Blend of fitness and slump

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COMMENTS:

That sounds like a nasty sort of lump. Should get it seen to. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:37:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: ōvərdoōd

Sentence: It doesn’t take much to get Mickey to overdude his weightlifting routine. Just someone looking his way can cause him to stack on extra weight. The resulting strains and pulls will keep him out of the gym for weeks.

Etymology: overdo (carry to excess; exaggerate) + dude (guy/fool)

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Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [pind] or [pwind]

Sentence: Determined to defeat his winter love handles, Mark finally returned to the gym only to be pwgymned by the chest press machine for five minutes, like a gnat under a toothpick, while he waited for a trainer to rescue him.

Etymology: A combination of 'gym', a building or room designed and equipped for indoor exercise, and 'pwned', a corruption of the word 'owned' denoting domination by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force. The combination sounds like 'pinned', meaning to hold something fast in a spot or position.

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: train-crash

Sentence: Connor's traincrash was the worst I'd ever seen at the gym. After two full days of repetitions on the machines, he was so exhausted that he fell asleep against the weights rack, which caused the weights to roll along the floor taking out half the yoga class, the rest of whom ran screaming towards the treadmills causing one of the joggers to lose his footing and suddenly shoot backward wherein he splashed into the pool causing a huge puddle to flood the floor beneath the weight rack giving Connor a terrible electric shock resulting in burns to 75% of his body and a nasty tremor that he'll have for the rest of his life.

Etymology: train (undertake a fitness program) + crash (incident that often causes injury) + train crash (something that is awful to witness)

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COMMENTS:

I've had a couple of those. Guess you could say I'm a 'trainwreck'. Great word. - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:49:00

too much loco motion, I suppose - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:49:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈdʒɪmˌdʒuɹ/ /JIMM-Joor/

Sentence: They told me to stay away from the free weights to avoid gymjury, but nobody warned me not to lean into the turns on the stationary bike.

Etymology: from gym + (in)jure

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COMMENTS:

you must be feeling a bit ginger after that. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:38:00

gym gyminie, gym gyminie, gym gymjury (where's purple when you have an annoying song reference) - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:27:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: were couch

Sentence: The annual january workouch proved as painful as always, the treadmill became a headmill, the bench press got a stranglehold which didn't release it's grip until he had peed on the pilates ball. The visit was followed by the annual visit to the chiropracter.

Etymology: workout, ouch

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COMMENTS:

Ouch indeed! - TJayzz, 2008-05-06: 20:56:00

Good one...do you think chiropractors own shares in gyms? mmmm - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 20:06:00

Excellent word! Simple yet versatile. - Tigger, 2008-05-07: 21:57:00

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: mus/cah/la/tore/chur

Sentence: Musculatorture occurs when the muscles are strained beyond endurance which often happens trying to open the heavy gym doors.

Etymology: musculature + torture

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: jĭm-mām'ē-əm

Sentence: He figued it was just a HALF-marathon, surely it would be no big deal. After all, before he'd laid off running-what was it, three and a nalf years now?-he'd had quite a few fun runs and even that one ten-K under his belt. Predictably, however, the event resulted in extensive gymaimium, from severe shin splints to bleeding, chafed nipples.

Etymology: Gym, var. of Jim, after workout guru Jum Belushi; maimi, var. of Mamie, after famous Jack LaLane mistress, Mamie Eisenhower; um, speech filler related to 'uh.'

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COMMENTS:

Galway's workouch goes well with your gymaimium. - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:32:00

good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:44:00

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