Verboticisms

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ten-dun-eye-tis

Sentence: Bill was right back where he started: on the couch next to a half-eaten box of meat-lover's pizza. But this time, he was unable to lift his arm to point the remote on account of his intendonitis. You see, earlier in the day he saw an infomercial about how to lose all that flab and he decided he was motivated enough to waltz into the gym and start off where he left the last time in college 15 years and 70lbs ago. He thought he begin with benching 240, the weight he used to do, but could only muster 3 reps of 80lbs. He didn't even need to use a pin to set the weights on the equipment circuit and didn't last 5 minutes on the treadmill.

Etymology: intend, to have in mind + tendonitis, inflamation of the tendons, often because of overuse

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COMMENTS:

xcellent - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:47:00

He might finish up with Adonitis! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:47:00

Good one, as they say, the path to Hell is paved with good Intendonitis... - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 19:58:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: an-yoor-iss-ize

Sentence: I thought I could manage one more rep but I ended up anuericising myself in quite an inconvenient place.

Etymology: Derived and extended from the Latin 'anueri' which was used to described self-abuse in all its unpleasant forms.

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COMMENTS:

Nice word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:41:00

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Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Arobe-Ego-nakker-ism

Sentence: At the age of "he should have known better", Richard's desperate desire to recapture his (self-deluded and fictional) youth and prowess, led him to the foolish act of joining the local gym. Once there, the sight of all the highly flexible and youthful "Gumby" girls and the muscular posturing of the male "Hunk" brigade led him to the disasterous effort of trying to compete with those a generation his Junior. The next day in the intensive care wing of the local hospital, his medical chart was filled in by the docter with the phrase "Suffered from an acute case of Arobegoknackerism during an overenergetic kneebend"

Etymology: Arobe- Arobic- (Self-inflicted pain) / Ego (Delusional self opinion) / Knacker (to bring something or oneself to the point of destruction or injury)

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈdʒɪmˌdʒuɹ/ /JIMM-Joor/

Sentence: They told me to stay away from the free weights to avoid gymjury, but nobody warned me not to lean into the turns on the stationary bike.

Etymology: from gym + (in)jure

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COMMENTS:

you must be feeling a bit ginger after that. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:38:00

gym gyminie, gym gyminie, gym gymjury (where's purple when you have an annoying song reference) - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:27:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: natch hurt o path ee

Sentence: Arnold's naturopathy exercises turned into nathurtopathy exercises when he strained himself on his dumbells...apparently they were aptly named.

Etymology: Naturopathy (a method of treating disease using food and exercise and heat to assist the natural healing process) & Hurt (sore, in pain)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: fit-fawl

Sentence: Jim had not been in the gym for some time. His major fitfall was being friends with a "gym rat" who pushed him to pursue the same routine that he follows. Jim now has more pulled muscles than the number of muscles he knew he had.

Etymology: fitness (The state or condition of being physically sound and healthy, especially as the result of exercise and proper nutrition) + pitfall (any trap or danger for the unwary)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit-ness-shlok

Sentence: Melvin once again found that he is a fitnesschlock, in such lousy physical condition that even moderate exercise caused not only excruciating pain, but left him lying on the couch for days recuperating.

Etymology: Blend of 'fitness' (physical condition) and 'schlock' (of low quality or value)

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Jim-nor-zee-um

Sentence: 'Thats it, I've had enough of this fitness lark' said Tom, as he hobbled over to the nearest bench to rest his swollen ankle. 'From now on Im calling this place the gymnausium, cos it makes me sick!!'

Etymology: Gymnasium(A place to get fit and play sport.) + Nausea(To feel sick) =Gymnausim

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: mus/cah/la/tore/chur

Sentence: Musculatorture occurs when the muscles are strained beyond endurance which often happens trying to open the heavy gym doors.

Etymology: musculature + torture

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