Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wayt for sur juree

Sentence: Smedley was determined to turn himself from a bookish, skinny nerd into a bronzed, buff love god. Unfortunately, he did not prepare himself properly...his bid to get laser surgery to correct his myopia failed and he needed even stronger glasses. His day at the tanning salon was also a disaster since he looked like a buttered lobster when done. And his weight training at the gym made him tear tendons, ligaments and caused him to become a weightforsurgery case. With any luck he'd be back to his old nerdy self in 6-9 months. He should have left well enough alone!

Etymology: weight (sports equipment used in calisthenic exercises and weightlifting; a weight that is not attached to anything and is raised and lowered by use of the hands and arms) & For Surgery (a medical procedure involving an incision with instruments; performed to repair damage or arrest disease in a living body) Rhymes with Wait for Surgery...all too common and lengthy a wait these days, sadly)

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Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [pind] or [pwind]

Sentence: Determined to defeat his winter love handles, Mark finally returned to the gym only to be pwgymned by the chest press machine for five minutes, like a gnat under a toothpick, while he waited for a trainer to rescue him.

Etymology: A combination of 'gym', a building or room designed and equipped for indoor exercise, and 'pwned', a corruption of the word 'owned' denoting domination by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force. The combination sounds like 'pinned', meaning to hold something fast in a spot or position.

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit-ness-shlok

Sentence: Melvin once again found that he is a fitnesschlock, in such lousy physical condition that even moderate exercise caused not only excruciating pain, but left him lying on the couch for days recuperating.

Etymology: Blend of 'fitness' (physical condition) and 'schlock' (of low quality or value)

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Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: ree-al-ittee-ayk

Sentence: Realityache. Newsome knew it all too well. Who was he kidding? What did he think was going to happen when he finally decided to get off his butt and start working out? Moderation? Nah. With full tilt workouts from the start and after a life of increasing sedentary circumstances, Newsome knew what realityache meant with each excrutiating movement of muscle in his body.

Etymology: reality + ache

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈdʒɪmˌdʒuɹ/ /JIMM-Joor/

Sentence: They told me to stay away from the free weights to avoid gymjury, but nobody warned me not to lean into the turns on the stationary bike.

Etymology: from gym + (in)jure

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COMMENTS:

you must be feeling a bit ginger after that. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:38:00

gym gyminie, gym gyminie, gym gymjury (where's purple when you have an annoying song reference) - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:27:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PATH-let-uh-siz-uhm

Sentence: Bob, whose only regular exercise previously was a walk to and from the car, seem certain to be heading for a fitprang, if he didn't immediately cease his obsessive, new found pathleticism.

Etymology: Blend of PATHETIC: (colloquially) pitiful, hopelessly inept or inappropriate; so stupid as to be ridiculous; PATH: element in many medical words meaning illness, injury disease of the body etc., & ATHLETICISM: characterized by, or involving physical activity or exercise & ISM: fad, esp of extravagant nature.

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COMMENTS:

nice one and fitprang made me LOL - petaj, 2008-05-06: 06:37:00

Nice one OB! - didsbury, 2008-05-06: 16:27:00

Fantastic entry! - Tigger, 2008-05-07: 22:02:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: jim - jur - ee

Sentence: Gym, Gyminy, Gym, Gyminy, Gym, Gymjury....Milton exclaimed after he lifted the 80 lb weight once again. This time, he felt intense pressure and straining in his groin area. That could not be good.....He should have waited longer after his hernia operation; not to mention that it had been 8 years since his last trip to the gym... This time he knew he had a really bad gymjury!

Etymology: gym, injury

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COMMENTS:

Very good. - Mustang, 2009-06-19: 03:03:00

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ten-dun-eye-tis

Sentence: Bill was right back where he started: on the couch next to a half-eaten box of meat-lover's pizza. But this time, he was unable to lift his arm to point the remote on account of his intendonitis. You see, earlier in the day he saw an infomercial about how to lose all that flab and he decided he was motivated enough to waltz into the gym and start off where he left the last time in college 15 years and 70lbs ago. He thought he begin with benching 240, the weight he used to do, but could only muster 3 reps of 80lbs. He didn't even need to use a pin to set the weights on the equipment circuit and didn't last 5 minutes on the treadmill.

Etymology: intend, to have in mind + tendonitis, inflamation of the tendons, often because of overuse

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COMMENTS:

xcellent - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:47:00

He might finish up with Adonitis! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:47:00

Good one, as they say, the path to Hell is paved with good Intendonitis... - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 19:58:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: natch hurt o path ee

Sentence: Arnold's naturopathy exercises turned into nathurtopathy exercises when he strained himself on his dumbells...apparently they were aptly named.

Etymology: Naturopathy (a method of treating disease using food and exercise and heat to assist the natural healing process) & Hurt (sore, in pain)

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