Verboticisms

Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: ree-al-ittee-ayk

Sentence: Realityache. Newsome knew it all too well. Who was he kidding? What did he think was going to happen when he finally decided to get off his butt and start working out? Moderation? Nah. With full tilt workouts from the start and after a life of increasing sedentary circumstances, Newsome knew what realityache meant with each excrutiating movement of muscle in his body.

Etymology: reality + ache

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hurt ills

Sentence: Frankie's new fitness routine was self-designed and not well thought out. He tried to force ten years of inactivity into one afternoon at the gym to get in shape. Of course he instead caused himself a series of hurtills which required medical attention.

Etymology: Hurdles (to jump a barrier)& Hurt (injured;feel pain or be in pain ) & Ills (not in good physical or mental health)

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: press-frak-chur

Sentence: Dan sustained a pressfracture when he tried to lift more weights than he should for a guy his age and shape. Adding insult to injury, he would have to endure the ribbing of the guys at the office and the constant "I told you so..." from his wife.

Etymology: press: a weight in weightlifting, to apply force or pressure + fracture: bone break or rupture in the cartilage -- stress fracture: fracture caused by undue stress or pressure on a bone

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit-ness-shlok

Sentence: Melvin once again found that he is a fitnesschlock, in such lousy physical condition that even moderate exercise caused not only excruciating pain, but left him lying on the couch for days recuperating.

Etymology: Blend of 'fitness' (physical condition) and 'schlock' (of low quality or value)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: train-crash

Sentence: Connor's traincrash was the worst I'd ever seen at the gym. After two full days of repetitions on the machines, he was so exhausted that he fell asleep against the weights rack, which caused the weights to roll along the floor taking out half the yoga class, the rest of whom ran screaming towards the treadmills causing one of the joggers to lose his footing and suddenly shoot backward wherein he splashed into the pool causing a huge puddle to flood the floor beneath the weight rack giving Connor a terrible electric shock resulting in burns to 75% of his body and a nasty tremor that he'll have for the rest of his life.

Etymology: train (undertake a fitness program) + crash (incident that often causes injury) + train crash (something that is awful to witness)

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COMMENTS:

I've had a couple of those. Guess you could say I'm a 'trainwreck'. Great word. - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:49:00

too much loco motion, I suppose - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:49:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: were couch

Sentence: The annual january workouch proved as painful as always, the treadmill became a headmill, the bench press got a stranglehold which didn't release it's grip until he had peed on the pilates ball. The visit was followed by the annual visit to the chiropracter.

Etymology: workout, ouch

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COMMENTS:

Ouch indeed! - TJayzz, 2008-05-06: 20:56:00

Good one...do you think chiropractors own shares in gyms? mmmm - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 20:06:00

Excellent word! Simple yet versatile. - Tigger, 2008-05-07: 21:57:00

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ten-dun-eye-tis

Sentence: Bill was right back where he started: on the couch next to a half-eaten box of meat-lover's pizza. But this time, he was unable to lift his arm to point the remote on account of his intendonitis. You see, earlier in the day he saw an infomercial about how to lose all that flab and he decided he was motivated enough to waltz into the gym and start off where he left the last time in college 15 years and 70lbs ago. He thought he begin with benching 240, the weight he used to do, but could only muster 3 reps of 80lbs. He didn't even need to use a pin to set the weights on the equipment circuit and didn't last 5 minutes on the treadmill.

Etymology: intend, to have in mind + tendonitis, inflamation of the tendons, often because of overuse

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COMMENTS:

xcellent - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:47:00

He might finish up with Adonitis! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:47:00

Good one, as they say, the path to Hell is paved with good Intendonitis... - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 19:58:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wayt for sur juree

Sentence: Smedley was determined to turn himself from a bookish, skinny nerd into a bronzed, buff love god. Unfortunately, he did not prepare himself properly...his bid to get laser surgery to correct his myopia failed and he needed even stronger glasses. His day at the tanning salon was also a disaster since he looked like a buttered lobster when done. And his weight training at the gym made him tear tendons, ligaments and caused him to become a weightforsurgery case. With any luck he'd be back to his old nerdy self in 6-9 months. He should have left well enough alone!

Etymology: weight (sports equipment used in calisthenic exercises and weightlifting; a weight that is not attached to anything and is raised and lowered by use of the hands and arms) & For Surgery (a medical procedure involving an incision with instruments; performed to repair damage or arrest disease in a living body) Rhymes with Wait for Surgery...all too common and lengthy a wait these days, sadly)

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jim-PARE-ment/

Sentence: Nathan was determined to be able to squeeze himself into his old Speedo bathing suit by summer, and he returned to the gym after a five year hiatus. But, as out-of-shape as he was, he gave himself a gympairment within five minutes of beginning his workout. He was gymbarrassed and felt like a gymposter in front of all the bodybuilders who had to help carry him out to his car. He was a total gymbecile for thinking he could still bench press his body weight like he used to.

Etymology: Gym - athletic facility equipped for sports or physical training (short for gymnasium; from Greek, gymnásion "gymnastic school") + Impairment - damage that results in a reduction of strength or quality (from Middle English, empeiren "to make worse")

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COMMENTS:

gympressive...most gympressive...but you are not a gymjedi yet - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:24:00

It's gympossible not to love it! There are so many great words today, too bad we can only pick 2! Makes one feel gympotent! - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 20:02:00

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