Verboticism: Archiaproctem

'Wow! Look what my grandpa gave me!'

DEFINITION: n. An old media format that is no longer popular or easily accessible, such as floppy disks, VHS tapes or stone tablets. v. To try to access data stored in an old-fashioned media format, especially it requires the use archaic technology and/or protocols.

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Grampaphone

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gram pa fone

Sentence: The boys loved going to visit Grampa, because he had so many neat old-fashioned gizmos that they had never seen before. One of their favourites was the grampaphone. It was a gramophone that played very old songs on 78 rpm records. It needed wound up all the time. Their parents were amazed that the boys knew the words to very old vaudeville, burlesque and music hall songs. They knew all the songs recorded by Al Jolson, Gracie Fields, George Formby, Edith Piaf, Rudy Vallee and Fats Waller among others. Their folks knew they spent too much time on the grampaphone, when they said goodbye to their teacher, Mrs. Jones. They would croon to her, "Toot-Toot-Tootsie goodbye, Toot-Toot-Tootsie, don't cry..."

Etymology: Gramophone (an antique record player; the sound of the vibrating needle is amplified acoustically) & Grampa (your father or mother's father; the affectionate term for a grandfather)

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COMMENTS:

artr A Grampaphone could also be that odd black plastic device that plugs into the wall and works like a cell with an anchor. - artr, 2010-05-24: 07:54:00

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Auldwangsyne

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: old-WANG-sine

Sentence: Computers, voice mail and all those other modern gizmoes were not what Bob dreamed of, he yearned for the clatter of the typewriter and the world of wordprocessors, and the days of auldwangsyne.

Etymology: The Wang Co.founded in 1954, makers of typewriters and early word processors & "auld lang syne" expression meaning "days of long ago"

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COMMENTS:

bittersweet just like the song - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-14: 14:21:00

Nostalgic! A tribute to the byte-gone ways! Has such great heart! Exceptional! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-14: 18:26:00

Should ALT acquaintents be ForMat and never brought to Mines... - Nosila, 2008-03-14: 23:20:00

Very technostalgic! Does anyone remember those 8-inch floppy disks? I think some of the Wangs had those... - Tigger, 2008-03-15: 15:10:00

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Defundtionals

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: de - fund - shun - als

Sentence: Humans have been inventing ways to store funds of knowledge from before the stone age to the present. Stone carvings, paper, books, pictures, vinyl records, tapes, disks, computer memory banks, data servers, ipods, blackberries, etc. We keep them all, though we seldom use the archaic ones. Was the first cosmic fund of knowledge written in the stars? Will the last fund of cosmic knowedge be written in the stars? Perhaps all these others in-between, are, were, and always have been, mere defundtionals.

Etymology: Fund, Defunctional. Fund: sources of things stored or saved. Defunctional: no longer used, operative, or functional.

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COMMENTS:

philosophical one - bigveg, 2008-03-14: 03:04:00

So, what you are saying is that every idea ever related by mankind are somehow stored in the universe. The last words spoken by Amelia Earhart may be recorded in the sand of an isolated atoll somewhere, the waves of her voice rearranging the particles of sand that lay beneath her contorted face as she met her end. The lost works of Chaucer could be reclaimed from the atomic impressions remaining on a rotting desk from the 14th century. The library at Alexandria could be reconstructed from a million fragments of ashen scrolls with the ability to distinguish ink from charcoal, and vast arrays of computers to reassemble the fragments into complete manuscripts. Every electromagnetic conveyance of media ever produced can be reclaimed from the stars if we can overcome the speed of light in order to catch up to it, as it travels through the vast emptiness of space. The only idea that can never be successfully reclaimed is the idea that is never communicated, so long as we can use our intellect in pursuit of the technology to recover that information. The possibility of mankind is limitl...whoops, gotta go, American Idol is on! - Banky, 2008-03-14: 10:23:00

Nice word :) - Banky, 2008-03-14: 10:24:00

Maybe planned obsolescence is in our DNA? - arrrteest, 2008-03-14: 13:21:00

I think there may be a book in this one - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-14: 14:03:00

Wow! Never expected so many comments on my two QUEST-tionings! It was asked in a much lighter vein than it was received! Banky, you read so much more into those two little questions!!! But here's another question for what ever you all want to see in it. Do our subconscious minds tap into an ethereal storage bank of all knowledge in the universe, then come up with bits of knowledge and solutions our conscious minds couldn't find ... and then place that in our conscious minds? I'll leave the book writing up to Banky and Nosila. I just have questions ... for me, life is but a quest for more about all things. I'm just grateful for how much easier it is to access all information in all the various media! But at the rate it is growing ... there is no such thing as all-knowing among us mere mortals. You're right Jabberwocky ... a book ... maybe many books!!! (wink/big smile). - silveryaspen, 2008-03-14: 16:58:00

Nice word;thought provoking sentence! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-16: 17:03:00

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Hitechniques

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: hīteknēks

Sentence: Rotary phones, transistor radios, 8-tracks, cassette players, VCRs, dial-up modems... Once the pinnacle of scientific genius, these marvels are now considered hitechniques, ancient relics of technology that has moved on. Some of them still function with a patchwork of adaptations. Most are only good for cannibalizing to keep others of their kind semi-functional.

Etymology: hitech (employing, requiring, or involved in high technology) + antiques (a collectible object such as a piece of furniture or work of art that has a high value because of its considerable age)

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Antechwhatee

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: ann teh wot eee

Sentence: the sound of the antechwhatee scratched along, every now and then receding so you could make out a strangulated voice crooning something about gramma.

Etymology: antiquity, tech, what

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COMMENTS:

What a witty clever pun! Nice one! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-14: 23:52:00

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Retronics

youmustvotenato

Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: rhymes with electronics

Sentence: What's with the retronics? You need to get iPhone 17 already

Etymology: Retro + electronics

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Mythicaligraphy

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: mith/i/ca/lig/ra/fee

Sentence: Since no one under the age of twenty uses cursive writing anymore, handwritten essays have become mythicaligraphy.

Etymology: mythical + caligraphy

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COMMENTS:

What's in a hand? Applause for this word! Outstanding! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-14: 17:10:00

marvelous word! love it!~ - diyan627, 2008-03-15: 11:15:00

Another top word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-16: 17:06:00

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Textinct

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: tik/stingkt

Sentence: The inability of any of today's computers to read the written data on the old large floppy disks have made them textinct.

Etymology: TEXTINCT - noun - from TEXT + EXTINCT - T+EXTINCT = TEXTINCT

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Techstinct

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: tek STINCT

Sentence: Why is it that the VHS video format is considered boring and old-fashioned, while both the Beta tapes and the Beta machines required to play them, which are even older, are now considered "retro" and "cute?" I guess the closer something gets to becoming techstinct, the cooler it becomes for collectors due to its rarity.

Etymology: tech + extinct

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Rosettastorage

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: row-set-tah-store-ridge

Sentence: Alex was fixated on amassing the largest collection of rosettastored modern media in the known world. The crown jewels in his menagerie were wax cylinders of Nine Inch Nails' "The Downward Spiral", "The Godfather Part III" presented in a swimming pool sized Zoetrope, and the painstaking and somewhat ironic translation of "The Mummy" in handpainted hieroglyphics. He would take various tour groups through the displays, pointing out the 8400 5 1/4" floppy disk download of the Wikipedia database on the left, the Russian woodcarvings of "Rocky IV" (mostly featuring gilded images of Drago as a werebear), and a series of dangerous pop-up books chronicling late 1970s blaxploitation pornography. Twice daily he would present various skits on a weekly rotating schedule; retellings of Judith Light Lifetime movies of the week in comedia dell'arte Punch and Judy shows, morality plays based on "Snow White" with wildly different dwarves, epic poems in which he related the trials and travels of Richard Branson, and on special occasions would present weeklong mesquite fueled smoke-signal presentations of Cormac McCarthy novels. His latest undertaking, an exhibit of "Norbit" on a series of Grecian urns was expected within the week.

Etymology: Rosetta stone - the large granite stone found by the French in 1799 which facilitated the deciperhing of Egyptian hieroglyphics + storage

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COMMENTS:

Great word, awesome sentence! - Jamagra, 2008-03-14: 11:21:00

Great word, awesome sentence! - Jamagra, 2008-03-14: 13:06:00

Wow!! - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-14: 14:16:00

Marvelous! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-14: 17:58:00

Love the use of "rosseta". Great sentence,also. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-16: 17:06:00

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