Verboticism: Phlegmbuoyance

'Oh-oh, I'm surrounded '

DEFINITION: n. A pile of used and discarded tissues; may constitute a bio-hazard. v. To drop a used tissue on to the floor beside your bed or chair, because you are so sick you can barely move.

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Phlegmbuoyance

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Phlegmzard

kashman

Created by: kashman

Pronunciation: Flem-zard

Sentence: Fighting with cold left George so numb that he became indifferent to the phlegmzard created in the living room of his shared apartment; this apparent "coldness" resulted in exodus of his roomate to less hazardous environment.

Etymology: Phlegm (viscid mucus secreted while suffering from cold) + Hazard (source of danger).

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Biohazmat

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bīōhazmat

Sentence: Paul was so sick that he didn't even care that his attempt to contain his tissues had gone hopelessly astray. Between the sofa where he was curled up and the waste paper basket was a trail of used tissues — a mucous menace — a phlegm flow — a biohazmat. After 3 days the mass had started to congeal into a two-dimensional piñata from hell.

Etymology: Biohazard (a risk to human health or the environment arising from biological work) + hazmat (Hazardous materials and items) + mat (a small rug)

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COMMENTS:

Haz my vote... - Nosila, 2009-01-02: 18:03:00

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Phlegmbuoyance

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: flem boy ants

Sentence: When Dougie was home sick, the zillions of tissues that he had sneezed, coughed and blown into were piled so high, his bed appeared to float on a sea of them.The fact that his jammies and bedding matched them, just demostrated to his servile mother his phlegmbuoyance.

Etymology: Phlegm (expectorated matter, saliva and other fluids secreted from facial openings) & Buoyance(ability to keep something afloat) & Flamboyance(extravagant elaborateness)

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Phlegmbuoyancy

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: flem boy ansee

Sentence: Even when deathly ill, Marcus exuded a certain phlegmbuoyancy. Although he felt he was on death's doorknob, he wore his silk pyjamas and monogrammed silk robe, along with his designer slippers. He used not paper hankies or toilet paper to remove his mucus, but a supply of monogrammed silk handkerchiefs, which his butler gathered up to send to the CDC in Atlanta. Marcus reclined on his chaiselongue, under a mink throw and suffered through this ague. With a full table of aspirin, cough syrups and decongestants, everything that modern medicine could afford was laid out at his bedside. His butler brought him hot toddies in gold or silver goblets and had steamy moisture piped into his sick room. He winced when his doctor had told him he had the Common Cold...how could that happen to one of such superior breeding? Beside his bed lay one of the classic books he currently read, called Great Expectorations, printed in its original Phlegmish language!

Etymology: Phlegm (nasal mucus) & Buoyancy (cheerfulness that bubbles to the surface;irrepressible liveliness and good spirit;the property of something weightless and insubstantial) Flamboyancy (richly and brilliantly colorful;elaborately or excessively ornamented)

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COMMENTS:

Eleveating the common cold to the royal pain it truly is! The grandiose elevated to the grandinose! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:43:00

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Tissooze

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: tish/oze

Sentence: Winter! Oh damn winter!! Take me now with your freezing minus 27 celcius, sore throat, aching ears, massive sinus ache, chills!!! Warmth, where is the warmth?!!!! I give up!!!!! Heating pad, neck warmer, not even four blankets help!!!!!! Running nose, rolls of toilet paper resulting in a massive mountain of tissooze surrounding me, burying me, suffocating me, killing me!!!!!!! Take me now wretched winter!!!!!!!! I succumb to you bastard winter!!!!!!!!!

Etymology: tissue + ooze

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COMMENTS:

You've obviously had the flu recently - great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:29:00

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Snortification

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /SNAWRT-tuh-fi-key-shun/

Sentence: After hacking, sneezing and snorting his way through four boxes of Kleenex over the last day and a half, Harry looked around to find himself surrounded by a snortification of used tissues. 'Typhoid Harry' was going to have to look for a weakness in the structure and find a way to break through the wall of Unkleenex rather quickly — another wave of nausea was coming on and he suspected he'd need a clear path to run to the toilet again.

Etymology: Snort - to breathe noisily and forcefully through the nostrils (from Middle English, snorten; probably related to "snore") + Fortification - defensive structure built around a stronghold (from Latin, fortis "strong")

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COMMENTS:

Perhaps he used the snortification to keep well wishers and do-gooders from cnstantly bothering him! - arrrteest, 2008-03-10: 22:01:00

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Tocsickwaste

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: tok sik way ssst

Sentence: He drifted back into conciousness with the worrying news that the tocsickwaste beside the couch appeared to be moving. thoughts of a new mutant virus were quelled when he noticed the face of his pet chihuahua looking up throught the gunge filled kleenex.

Etymology: toxic waste, sick.

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COMMENTS:

poor chihuahua probably had a very glossy coat after that experience - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:28:00

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Amalgamucus

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: ə-māl'gə myōō'kəs

Sentence: Barney was 15 and a profuse masturbator, but he had been off his oats with a bad cold for several days, and the unholy assemblage beside his bed was part sploogepile and part amalgamucus.

Etymology: amalgam, a mixture or combination; mucus, a viscous, slimy mixture, chiefly mucin, water, cells, and inorganic salts, secreted by glands lining the nasal and other body cavities; main binder in boogers.

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COMMENTS:

Good word. Only one thing to say after that sentence though — Ick! :[ - Tigger, 2008-03-10: 23:18:00

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Tishubation

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: Tish you bay shun

Sentence: With red eyes, and an ever-flowing nose, Colter stumbled into work despite his head cold. He blew the day, and he blew work he needed to do, because he was too busy blowing his nose. His desk was covered with used tissues. Weak and unsteady, leaving his pile of tishubations, and weaving a trail of tishubations, he stumbled home.

Etymology: TITUBATION, TISSUE. TITUBATION - an unsteady or stumbling gait or a head tremor, often caused by a disorder in the cerebellum, a head disorder ... in this case a head disorder caused by the infected, mucous-filled sinuses from a cold. TISSUE - paper hankie, a square of absorbent paper used mainly to wipe areas of the face, especially the mucus flowing from the nose.

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COMMENTS:

Been there...done that - Nosila, 2009-01-02: 18:07:00

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Inphlegmatory

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in flem a tor ee

Sentence: The Fire Marshall was certain to declare that the bedroom floor of Sal Iver's house was definitely an inphlegmatory risk. Sal had been sick with the flu for 2 days and had neither the skill nor the will to put all his used tissues in a receptacle. His bedroom was the site of much hankie pankie and the normally phlegmboyant Sal was reduced to that of a bronchialbuster who had not lasted long enough to win the big purse. The irony was that 2 days ago, he had planned to phone in sick to play hookey from work. He figured the word Gesundheit meant "serves you right". All this while his catarrh gently weeps...sniff, sniff!

Etymology: Inflammatory (characterized or caused by inflammation;unhealthy, detrimental to health) & Phlegm (Mucous,expectorated matter;saliva mixed with discharges from the respiratory passages)

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COMMENTS:

Ack !! I wanted to use "phlegm" for this one. Let's see... there are three more body fluids, right? I mean, phlegm, blood, something and something else... Gosh this is going to be difficult. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-19: 02:48:00

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