Verboticism: Grossceries

'I know it's loaded with calories...'

DEFINITION: n. Any highly-processed food or beverage in which the natural ingredients have been removed and replaced with artificial flavors and additives. v. To consume food products laced with synthetic sweeteners, imitation flavors, and other carcinogens.

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Grossceries

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Piquantoxifodder

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: PICK-one-TOCKS-ih-fodder

Sentence: Chuck planted his corpulent posterior in the orange naugahide chair and settled down to his first day at the new job. Thankful to be employed, he relished his new assignment at Universal Test Kitchens...sampling and rating new food products before they were foisted upon the unsuspecting public.Being a true foodlum, he had quaffed, chomped, swigged and munched through an array of buyprodux, each containing an ersatz nutritute carefully engineered from corn syrup and cheap tropical fat. Some dishes were trendylicious and pungent, others had all the appeal of a used bovine salt lick. It wasn't until the late afternoon when Chuck found his favorite concoction. It was real PIQUANTOXIFODDER - stripped of any wasteful vitamins, yet replete with satisfying textures that reminded him of that strangest of foods- tapioca. After secretly cramming down his third helping, Chuck succumbed to a case of megacramps that a gallon of peptodismall wouldn't cure. On the way home, he had to pull over discreetly near an irrigation ditch and make a contribution.Plop Plop Fizz Fizz. Sweating like a cut of rancid pork, Chuck knew that the product he ingested was sure to be a great seller. It was....ambrosia!

Etymology: PIQUANt+TOXIc+FODDER=PIQUANTOXIFODDER.....PIQUANT:agreeably stimulating to the palate,engagingly provocative taste;Middle French, from present participle of piquer.....TOXIC:containing or being poisonous material especially when capable of causing death or serious debilitation,extremely harsh, malicious, or harmful;Late Latin toxicus, from Latin toxicum poison, from Greek toxikon arrow poison, from neuter of toxikos of a bow, from toxon bow, arrow.....FODDER:something fed to domestic animals ; especially : coarse food for cattle, horses, or sheep,-inferior or readily available material used to supply a heavy demand;Middle English, from Old English fōdor; akin to Old High German fuotar food.....AMBROSIA:the food of the Greek and Roman gods;Latin, from Greek, literally, immortality, from ambrotos immortal.(bonus word)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Amusing OLD advertisements: http://www.lileks.com/oldads/index.html - metrohumanx, 2009-01-29: 01:56:00

metrohumanx This space intentionally left blank. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-29: 21:27:00

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Nutrideficient

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: new-treh-de-FISH-unt

Sentence: Filbert was in complete denial about the 'power drink' he consumed daily, thinking it was packed with added vitamins, minerals and nutriments but it was in fact, totally nutrideficient.

Etymology: Blend of 'nutrition' (beneficial attribute of food) and 'deficient' (in short supply-absent)

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Sinmatation

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sin ma tay shun

Sentence: John's kitchen was a chemist's nightmare. His prepared and processed foods were full of ingredients with very long, complex and foreign sounding components. His fridge and freezer were filled with modified products like near-beer, fake-a-cola, meatcheat, shamham, narydairy, stiltedcheese, designwine, oughterwater, yolkjoke, pearsatz and artifishfingers. John had traded away nutrition and healthy sustenance for convenience and sinmatation. His pantry contained replicas of foods, like synammon, appeteasers, fakemixes, bastardpasta, forgeporridge, macaphoni, wannabeans, dupesoup,inbreads, fauxjoe, cornterfeits and other appetite simulants. Yes, John, would learn later in life that trading off cooking time and a few calories and possible tooth decay for mysterious, unpronounceable carcinogenic substances was a short-sighted exchange.

Etymology: Sin (an act that is regarded by theologians as a transgression of God's will) & Synthetic (a compound made artificially by chemical reactions;not of natural origin; prepared or made artificially) & Imitation ( copying (or trying to copy) the actions of someone/something else)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx You crack me up every time, Nosie. Those new "lite" pierogies just don't do it for me, though. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-29: 01:39:00

They go with cabbage droles and cubelsa! - Nosila, 2009-01-29: 01:50:00

Super sentence. Super Word! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-29: 22:20:00

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Pepsicodology

Created by: scrabbelicious

Pronunciation: pép:see:cód:ol:oh:gee

Sentence: Séamus and his sweet tooth went everywhere together. Always pestering him for a treat, Séamus had a cunning plan that he, his sweet tooth and his liquid diet could be made live in harmony with a bit of pepsicodology.

Etymology: Pepsi : Sweet drink suitable for athletes who run at least one marathon per day, every day. Codology : an Irish colloquialism indicating the wool is being pulled somewhere reasonably close by.

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Caldrieath

Created by: leeannhamers

Pronunciation: Ka-Al-dree-eth

Sentence: My mom told me not to have soda its one of those Caldrieath foods.

Etymology: Calories, Drinks, Death

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Artifoodage

Created by: ahmadmalik2007

Pronunciation: aa-rti-fod-aij

Sentence: In modern world, people prefer artifoodage becuase its quick and delicious, however, it cannot be the replacement for natural food.

Etymology: artifoodage is a short form extracted from three words: arti from artificial, food from food and age from beverage.

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Colack

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: COE lack

Sentence: One day when I asked her why she always asked me for a colack instead of a cola she said, "You notice how cola sounds so good. Co la la la la...its a happy sound. I call it colack because it lacks anything good." When I asked her why she continued to order them everyday, she said, "I guess I lack good sense."

Etymology: COLA: soda drink LACK: to have none or not enough of something

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Artisinful

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: ar-ti-sin-ful

Sentence: Carl started every day with a sugary cola even though he knew it was artisinful and causing him to lose his teeth.

Etymology: Arti- Taken in part of artificial - Made by humans; produced rather than natural. Sinful- To do wrong or characterized by or being a sin.

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Pseudofoodo

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: soōdōfoōdō

Sentence: Charlie is a vegetarian at heart. The thought of killing some poor defenseless creature saddens him deeply. When he read about a study that claimed that plants emit a sound much like a scream when picked, he was left in a quandary. What could he eat? His solution? Pseudofoodo! The "O" foods! Munchos, Bunchos, Crunchos, Chunkos, Dunkos. The more processed - the farther away from anything living - the better he likes it. If only those bio-degradable packing peanuts had a little cheese or onion flavoring. If only he had the energy to go to the gymo to work off some of his flabo.

Etymology: pseudo (not genuine; sham) + food (any nutritious substance that people or animals eat or drink) + "O" for the O foods.

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COMMENTS:

Oh! Oh! So good! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-29: 08:35:00

too true - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-29: 09:42:00

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Eatitives

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: eet it ivs

Sentence: Freddy only consumed foods laced with eatitives. He believed that lots of long names in ingredients were healthy for him and powered up his energy and nutrition count.

Etymology: Eat (to consume) & Additives (things added to foods to enhance flavour, shelf life, colour and desirability)

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