Verboticism: Tissueissue

'Oh-oh, I'm surrounded '

DEFINITION: n. A pile of used and discarded tissues; may constitute a bio-hazard. v. To drop a used tissue on to the floor beside your bed or chair, because you are so sick you can barely move.

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Kleenexsport

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kleen ex sport

Sentence: Lying in his sickbed, watching the Olympic Sports Channel all day, Ernie knew that he could win a gold medal for his country in the pathogen pentathlon: his nose runs, his eyes soar, his lip curls, his fever pitches and his body heats. He could do a slalom down the mountain of kleenexsport by the side of his bed. He would have to do a viral spiral to get to the bathroom before he had to luge again. Yes, his biohazard biathalon would end if he could only get some schuss time. His ailing body was truly an international competition: He put the "Germ" in Germany; the "chill" in Chile;the "I Ran" in Iran; the "Catarrh" in Qatar;and he had been feeling "Laos-y" all day!

Etymology: kleenex (a piece of soft absorbent paper usually two or more thin layers used as a disposable handkerchief) & export ( to transfer goods or to cause to spread) & sport (an active diversion requiring physical exertion and competition)

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COMMENTS:

petaj His Doctor gave him vitamin C and said get it India. He also put the malaise in Malaysia and the 'ails' in Wales. - petaj, 2008-03-10: 10:03:00

great sentence - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:27:00

Great read and word! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-10: 23:03:00

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Cleanix

Created by: Nuwanda

Pronunciation: Clee-nix

Sentence: Because she was usually fairly fastidious, Carla took measure of the cleanix surrounding her as a barometer of how sick she was. When she could no longer step off the couch without touching down on one of the slime nuggets, it was time to call the doctor.

Etymology: Kleenex, the popular tissue, altered to combine clean and nix, as in to put the kibosh on something.

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COMMENTS:

Nice etymology! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-07: 15:05:00

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Inphlegmatory

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in flem a tor ee

Sentence: The Fire Marshall was certain to declare that the bedroom floor of Sal Iver's house was definitely an inphlegmatory risk. Sal had been sick with the flu for 2 days and had neither the skill nor the will to put all his used tissues in a receptacle. His bedroom was the site of much hankie pankie and the normally phlegmboyant Sal was reduced to that of a bronchialbuster who had not lasted long enough to win the big purse. The irony was that 2 days ago, he had planned to phone in sick to play hookey from work. He figured the word Gesundheit meant "serves you right". All this while his catarrh gently weeps...sniff, sniff!

Etymology: Inflammatory (characterized or caused by inflammation;unhealthy, detrimental to health) & Phlegm (Mucous,expectorated matter;saliva mixed with discharges from the respiratory passages)

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COMMENTS:

Ack !! I wanted to use "phlegm" for this one. Let's see... there are three more body fluids, right? I mean, phlegm, blood, something and something else... Gosh this is going to be difficult. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-19: 02:48:00

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Tissidue

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TISH-i-dyoo

Sentence: You imprison me in the dark recesses of your bags and pockets until I'm ready to be used for your most basic needs. You wipe your filthy hands on me; you spit on me. You drown me in your fetid waste. You despise me, calling me a threat to your environment. You throw me away. But remember it was you who you made me what I am - tissidue - for there was a time when I was a tree.

Etymology: Blend of TISSUE & RESIDUE

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COMMENTS:

Tree mend us. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-10: 10:46:00

how sad - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 16:58:00

Your sentence reminds me of "The Giving Tree" — albeit a more bitter version... - Tigger, 2008-03-10: 23:24:00

Poignant, yet elementree...where's my tissue? - Nosila, 2008-03-11: 22:36:00

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Contagreggation

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: con-tag-re-gay-shun

Sentence: Oh no, snot another one. The contagreggation was now so large, that the nurse donned a biohazard outfit to take his temperature.

Etymology: contagion + aggregation

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COMMENTS:

That clever first line will live forever in the memory. - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:50:00

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Infloorendsza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/flor/ends/za

Sentence: Josh had learned in his meditation class to let go of problems and let them float away so he put the teaching into practice used infloorendsza to rid himself of his germs carefully wrapped up in tissues.

Etymology: influenza + floor + ends + za (which is sort of like ya)

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COMMENTS:

Serendipsliptissue-ous! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:49:00

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Snotzone

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: snot-zone

Sentence: Seeing Bob lying there with a cesspool of snot rags beside him, Sue knew what she had to do. She quickly donned her self-contained breathing apparatus and fully encapsulated Level A suit, entered the snotzone, and began to gingerly pluck the mucousy mess from the floor.

Etymology: hot zone (in HAZMAT response, the area of contamination), snot

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle hee hee - you beat me to it! - libertybelle, 2008-03-10: 09:30:00

gross, but funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:26:00

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Mucousfication

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: mew/cus/fi/cay/shun

Sentence: By the time they found him, mucousfication was already complete. The mess of mucousy tissues had crept up the side of his bed and bound him head to toe. They named him Snotuncommon.

Etymology: mucous + mummification

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COMMENTS:

Love Snotuncommon... reminds me of that Tom Jones song, It's Snot Unusual. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-10: 18:27:00

Snot the end of the world, he could be a victim on CSI!! - Nosila, 2008-03-10: 19:30:00

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Moundusmucosi

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: moun-dus-myoo-coh-see

Sentence: Ellen couldn't get to Bob's bedside without kicking asside the moundusmucosi that had accumulated from mass of used tissues.

Etymology: moundus, mound + mucosi, mucus

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Topplesnot

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: top'/el/snot

Sentence: "Be careful," she warned her guest, "I've had a nasty cold all weekend and I haven't cleaned up the topplesnots yet. There's one on the couch and one beside the la-z-boy, so watch your step."

Etymology: topple (to fall or tumble forward as from having too heavy of a top) + snot (mucus from the nasal passages)

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