Verboticism: Faceholder

'Why are you putting that by the front door?'

DEFINITION: n., An ugly decorative item or article of clothing received from friends or relatives, which is kept stored away but ready to be pulled out at a moment's notice in anticipation of a return visit. v., To temporarily place an old, and perhaps unattractive gift in a place of honor.

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Ugiftorate

tonii

Created by: tonii

Pronunciation: /ug-ift-o-rate/

Sentence: If you don't ugiftorate that nasty green vase onto the coffee table, your sister-in-law will never speak to you again!

Etymology: ugly + gift+ decorate

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Beautifake

Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: 'byu ti fayk

Sentence: "Uncle Simone is coming over, Samantha. Time to beautifake yourself."..."No way, Dad. That plaid sweater is such an ugly beautifakation."

Etymology: beautify + fake

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Curiotrocity

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: kuri/oh/traw/city

Sentence: A curiotrocity is a curio that is so atrocious that it defies description. I have several.

Etymology: curio + atrocity

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Showgiz

Created by: Lidipop

Pronunciation: ssh-oh-g-iz

Sentence: Sweety, get your mothers gifts out of the closet...it's time to "showgiz" them!!! :)

Etymology: show case + gift + gizmos

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Tackytic

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: tak eee tik

Sentence: They made a tackytical substitution over the fireplace in the living room. The singing fish replaced the Van Gogh for the duration of old uncle chuck's visit to town.

Etymology: tack tactic.

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Prezzidigitate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PREZZ-ee-DIJ-ee-TATE

Sentence: Bob had just put away the kitschsake toaster-clock his mother had given him many years before, when he heard the news that his mother-in-law was on her way over to his place. Quickly, and in order not to offend her, he rummaged through an old trunk in his garage to find the indoor sundial she had given him as a birthday present. Fortunately for him, with good luck and a dash of good memory, he found it and prezzidigitated it, as a dragonsop, into a place of prominence and importance for her to see.

Etymology: Blend of PREZZI: (slang for present, gift.) & PRESTIDIGITATE: to be manually dexterios in the execution of tricks ; sleight of hand. KITSCHSAKE: Conflation of KITSCH(from German)meaning: gaudy, trashy objects or items and (OE) SAKE, as in "keepsake", meaning an item kept for the sake of the giver. DRAGONSOP: DRAGON-Slang term for mother-in-law or wife; SOP: Anything given (or done)to pacify; -- so called from the sop given to Cerberus, as related in mythology.

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COMMENTS:

Works like magic for me! - silveryaspen, 2008-12-16: 22:36:00

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Zombift

Created by: grauntlet

Pronunciation: zam bIft

Sentence: His wife was beginning to serve tea to her mother when Duncan said: "where did you get this god-awful tea set? why dont you get the nice one?". His wife didn't have the time to warn him about the zombift.

Etymology: zombie + gift

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Interimantlepiece

Created by: hendrixius

Pronunciation: /in-tur-ruh-man-tull-pees/

Sentence: John reluctantly displayed the interimantlepiece over the couch in the family room, despite the fact that a singing bass did not exactly match the room's decor.

Etymology: "interim" and "mantle-piece"

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Faceholder

Created by: emdeejay

Pronunciation: Faye Solder

Sentence: Dear old Aunt Faye. She would be best described as having a heart of gold, being generous to a fault, and possessing a taste for the profoundly kitsch. The cupboards of her relatives were stacked to the brim with gifts ranging from the impossibly garish, to the patently absurd. This year, Jayne and John were taking their turn at hosting the family festive gathering. Some show of appreciation for Faye's presence would have to be shown, so after a short deliberation it was down with the Salvador Dali print, and up with "Big Mouth Billy Bass"! Fortunately the luncheon passed without major incident; the family chipper, overfed, and blissfully subdued. Suddenly, an uncomfortable silence fell over the mirthful murmur as Faye inquired: "John whatever became of that delightful water feature I gave you, or that fabulous paisley shirt?" Faceholder to the rescue! John strolled casually over to Billy Bass and just before pressing the button he remarked "Dear Aunt Faye! My shirt has been worn so often, it's at the tailors for a mend. But Billy you see is the pride of the mantle!" And the family, relieved, joined Billy in a rousing rendition of "Take me to the river"

Etymology: Placeholder: Object or entity employed until an adequate replacement can be found. Face (to save): action employed for the purpose of maintaining dignity.

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Whitelephantasmagoria

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: whyt EL eh fan TAZ ma GOR ee ah

Sentence: Over the holidays, my house becomes a whitelephantasmagoria of sorts, as I rotate in and out the succession of useless and hideous items given to me over the years by various relatives. I have to keep a calendar of who is coming when, so that the correct one is on display on the correct day. God forbid I put out the horrid quilt made for my grandchildren by their grandmother, my EX-mother-in-law, when my CURRENT mother-in-law visits. She has an uncanny sense for such things.

Etymology: white elephant + phantasmagoria (a constantly shifting complex succession of things seen or imagined; a series or group of strange or bizarre images seen as if in a dream)

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COMMENTS:

Whitelephantasmagoria are kept in a special trunk...good word - Nosila, 2009-12-16: 22:15:00

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