Verboticism: Waitwatching

'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Mallinger

Created by: kabloozie

Pronunciation: Mahl-LING-er

Sentence: Two hours after the Wife entered Old Navy, Bob was seen in the food court, mallingering on the cement bench with an empty bag of Cinnabons.

Etymology: Mall: a large retail complex with no hardware stores. Linger: to pass time in a tedious manner.

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COMMENTS:

wow. my first verboticism....sniff. - kabloozie, 2007-09-26: 02:26:00

petaj It's a good one too. No auto parts stores in a Mall either. - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:44:00

good start! - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:22:00

wow - what a debut!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:42:00

Perhaps Bob should have lingered in lingerie boutique. Might not have been so teduous for him ! Good start:good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:44:00

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Guybrowse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Poutfit

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Pow-t-fit

Sentence: After trying on several different dresses, fourteen pairs of shoes and tried a number of handbags to see if they matched, Sarah had still not managed to settle for any of them. Frank had been waiting for two hours and was having a serious poutfit, he had promised his mates he would meet them down the pub and wanted to get there before they gave up on him and headed home. He was thinking of faking some sort of fit so that they get out of the place once and for all.

Etymology: Pout(to push one's lips forward as an expression of petulant annoyance) + Outfit(a set of clothes worn together) + Fit(a sudden attack of convulsions) = Poutfit

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Poor Frank ! He just has to learn a little patience. two hours is just considered a warm-up. Hahahah - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 01:21:00

so many funny words today - isn't there a store called Urban Poutfitters - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:07:00

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Gaptive

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: gap/tiv

Sentence: He wanted to be at home watching the game but instead he was held gaptive at the Gap outlet

Etymology: gap + captive

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Contemplaza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: con/tem/pla/za

Sentence: While dutifully lugging bags around the mall like a pack mule, Chris would quietly contemplaza the meaning of life.

Etymology: contemplate + plaza

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COMMENTS:

Has he discovered what it is? If so, please let me know. Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:55:00

metrohumanx Always look on the BRIGHT side of lfe. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 01:29:00

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Mandroid

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mandroid

Sentence: Whenever Cindy goes shopping, her boyfriend becomes her mandroid. He becomes a purse-holding, head-nodding, cart-pushing robot. He will spout pre-determined phrases like ”that looks great on you” or ”no, that’s not too much to spend if you really like it”.

Etymology: man (an adult human male) + android (a robot with a human appearance)

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Betrudge

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bih-truhj

Sentence: When Jill wants to go shopping she likes to take Tom with her. She'll bounce from store to store like a lioness on a hunt. He'll betrudge along behind her like a trailer with flat tires. They've been together long enough that he knows when to nod and when to grunt something like "That look great on you".

Etymology: begrudge (to be reluctant to give, grant, or allow) + trudge (to walk, especially laboriously or wearily)

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Slowmad

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

metrohumanx Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Pursevere

kathleen

Created by: kathleen

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Vapidrift

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

metrohumanx Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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