Verboticism: Phlegmbuoyance

'Oh-oh, I'm surrounded '

DEFINITION: n. A pile of used and discarded tissues; may constitute a bio-hazard. v. To drop a used tissue on to the floor beside your bed or chair, because you are so sick you can barely move.

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Phlegmbuoyance

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Kleenexsport

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kleen ex sport

Sentence: Lying in his sickbed, watching the Olympic Sports Channel all day, Ernie knew that he could win a gold medal for his country in the pathogen pentathlon: his nose runs, his eyes soar, his lip curls, his fever pitches and his body heats. He could do a slalom down the mountain of kleenexsport by the side of his bed. He would have to do a viral spiral to get to the bathroom before he had to luge again. Yes, his biohazard biathalon would end if he could only get some schuss time. His ailing body was truly an international competition: He put the "Germ" in Germany; the "chill" in Chile;the "I Ran" in Iran; the "Catarrh" in Qatar;and he had been feeling "Laos-y" all day!

Etymology: kleenex (a piece of soft absorbent paper usually two or more thin layers used as a disposable handkerchief) & export ( to transfer goods or to cause to spread) & sport (an active diversion requiring physical exertion and competition)

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COMMENTS:

petaj His Doctor gave him vitamin C and said get it India. He also put the malaise in Malaysia and the 'ails' in Wales. - petaj, 2008-03-10: 10:03:00

great sentence - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:27:00

Great read and word! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-10: 23:03:00

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Snotragnarok

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈsnɑt ˈɹægnəˌɹɑk/

Sentence: Since she lived alone, every time she got sick, her entire house turned into a snot ragnarok, and they had to call in the biohazard squad to dig her out.

Etymology: from: snot rag + Ragnarok

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COMMENTS:

Sounds like Germnobyl all over again! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-10: 21:17:00

It's practically 'Snotterdammerung' in that house! Very creative word. - Tigger, 2008-03-10: 23:56:00

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Infloorendsza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/flor/ends/za

Sentence: Josh had learned in his meditation class to let go of problems and let them float away so he put the teaching into practice used infloorendsza to rid himself of his germs carefully wrapped up in tissues.

Etymology: influenza + floor + ends + za (which is sort of like ya)

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COMMENTS:

Serendipsliptissue-ous! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-02: 07:49:00

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Phlegmflam

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: flem flam

Sentence: When Oscar phoned in sick again, his boss, Mr. Ness, became suspicious and sent someone over to see what was happening. Instead of flimflam, this time Oscar really did have Phlegmflam and was surrounded in a pile of dirty tissues. His boss soon was sorry to doubt Oscar, as his agent not only got infected himself, but gave it to the boss on his report. After that he was known as Mr. Ill Ness!

Etymology: Phlegm (sputum;expectorated matter; saliva mixed with discharges from the respiratory passages) & Flam (A lie or hoax; a deception or Nonsense; drivel). Wordplay on FlimFlam (a swindle in which you cheat)

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Inphlegmatory

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in flem a tor ee

Sentence: The Fire Marshall was certain to declare that the bedroom floor of Sal Iver's house was definitely an inphlegmatory risk. Sal had been sick with the flu for 2 days and had neither the skill nor the will to put all his used tissues in a receptacle. His bedroom was the site of much hankie pankie and the normally phlegmboyant Sal was reduced to that of a bronchialbuster who had not lasted long enough to win the big purse. The irony was that 2 days ago, he had planned to phone in sick to play hookey from work. He figured the word Gesundheit meant "serves you right". All this while his catarrh gently weeps...sniff, sniff!

Etymology: Inflammatory (characterized or caused by inflammation;unhealthy, detrimental to health) & Phlegm (Mucous,expectorated matter;saliva mixed with discharges from the respiratory passages)

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COMMENTS:

Ack !! I wanted to use "phlegm" for this one. Let's see... there are three more body fluids, right? I mean, phlegm, blood, something and something else... Gosh this is going to be difficult. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-19: 02:48:00

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Snotzone

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: snot-zone

Sentence: Seeing Bob lying there with a cesspool of snot rags beside him, Sue knew what she had to do. She quickly donned her self-contained breathing apparatus and fully encapsulated Level A suit, entered the snotzone, and began to gingerly pluck the mucousy mess from the floor.

Etymology: hot zone (in HAZMAT response, the area of contamination), snot

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle hee hee - you beat me to it! - libertybelle, 2008-03-10: 09:30:00

gross, but funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 13:26:00

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Viralysis

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: vi-RAL-a-sis

Sentence: Although Kevin was in danger of asphyxiation by tissue, his viralysis was total and he could do nothing more than drop another tissue onto the sodden snotscape.

Etymology: viral + paralysis

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COMMENTS:

kashman Brilliant...quite "snoty" analysis of the "paralysis" :) - kashman, 2008-03-10: 13:00:00

this word really grows on you - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-10: 16:57:00

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Biohazmat

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bīōhazmat

Sentence: Paul was so sick that he didn't even care that his attempt to contain his tissues had gone hopelessly astray. Between the sofa where he was curled up and the waste paper basket was a trail of used tissues — a mucous menace — a phlegm flow — a biohazmat. After 3 days the mass had started to congeal into a two-dimensional piñata from hell.

Etymology: Biohazard (a risk to human health or the environment arising from biological work) + hazmat (Hazardous materials and items) + mat (a small rug)

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COMMENTS:

Haz my vote... - Nosila, 2009-01-02: 18:03:00

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Tisspew

Created by: zabxuq

Pronunciation: tiss-sp_u

Sentence: The flu was simply too much. Fixing his own lunch was out of the question. With barely enough energy to tisspew, Gil could do nothing but wait for chicken soup reinforcements to arrive under their own power.

Etymology: Tisspew: v. combination of tissue: a thin gauzy paper + spew: eject or cast away.

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COMMENTS:

Souper! - Nosila, 2009-01-02: 18:06:00

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Encompasnot

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: en-kuhm-puh-snot

Sentence: After he removed the encompasnot from the entire floor of his bedroom, he hesitated to dispose of it in the composter, perhaps it would contaminate the earth? Maybe grow into a big mucus tree of snot?

Etymology: encompass + snot

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