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'Must buy presents.'

DEFINITION: n., The wondrous, and the "wonder how I'm going to pay for it" feelings of the holiday shopping season. v., To stumble through a shopping mall like a zombie on a buying binge, grabbing anything and everything that will fit on your credit card.

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Verboticisms

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Noelosis

Created by: jmotsch

Pronunciation: no el oh sis

Sentence: Jeb was suffering from a bad case of noelosis of the giver.

Etymology:

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Presentension

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pres ent ten shun

Sentence: You know the feeling of presentension in the store, when you cross your fingers at the till in the hopes that your purchase of gifts won't be declined by your credit card company. It is followed by the relief of the sale actually going through. (Hopefully)

Etymology: presents & tension

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Fooltide

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: fool-tide

Sentence: At 5:00 pm on October 31st the "fooltide carols" begin to work their voodoo on their unsuspecting targets. Accompanied by the glow and sparkle of lights and tinsel, and the lure of huge sales, the happy little tunes plant themselves in the brains of shoppers who wander trancelike through the aisles, knowing full well that they're destroying their credit rating, but unable to resist the hypnosis of the television commercials that even make buying a Lexus with a big red bow seem reasonable. At 12:00 noon on December 25 the music stops and everyone goes back to their lives as if nothing happened.

Etymology: wordplay on Yuletide -- fool: one who lacks good judgement; one acts unwisely on a given occasion + tide: time or season - most often used in combination such as yuletide or Christmastide

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Lurchase

Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Lur-chis

Sentence: Deanne stumbled through the endless maze of brightly decorated, tinsellated, festoonyoulated and carol-playing shops, stupefied and buying random objects that caught her attention. She zomgrabitated to items of medium size and moderate cost, vaguely recalling her credit limit and dragging her stumbleboon behind her. With glazed unblinking eyes she spotted a shiny articulating hand-held kitchen whizzywidget and immediately zomplasticated it, adding her latest lurchase to her already stuponderous load.

Etymology: Lurch - brrrraaaiiinnnnsssss!!! Purchase - acquire through the dangerous use of plastic when the brain is in a zombastic state.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I want one, too. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 12:14:00

nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-12-17: 13:25:00

hyperborean You're on a roll! - hyperborean, 2008-12-17: 19:20:00

Very, scary realistic story! - Nosila, 2008-12-17: 21:44:00

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Chribinger

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: Chribinger: Kri-binj-her

Sentence: There were so many Chribingers in the mall, that Master Card chuckled in glee!

Etymology: Chri for Christmas and cringe ... and binge ... for shopping binge ... er for her

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Oweholynight

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: oh holee nite

Sentence: Oweholynight! The stores are brightly shining, It is the night of getting your money's worth, Long lay those cards in purse and pocket pining, Tills reappear and the soul spent its worth. A thrill of hope the retail world rejoices, For yonder breaks your budget by Mastercard. Fall on your knees! Owe, hear the Visa voices! Owenight divine, Owenight when AmEx was reborn; Owenight divine, Owenight, Owenight Divine.

Etymology: Owe (be in debt, owe money for goods bought) & O Holy Night (Christmas Eve, the night of Jesus' birth, the reason we celebrate Christmas; the title of a Carol announcing the birth of the Savior)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I didn't know you were so musical! Nice job! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 00:47:00

magic!! love it! - galwaywegian, 2008-12-17: 04:06:00

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Splurjesus

Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: splur 'jee zus

Sentence: In one day, Peter splurjesused $1500 on gifts. And why wouldn't he? As a Christian, it's his duty to spend as much as possible during the holiday season.

Etymology: A portmanteau of 'splurge' and 'Jesus'; the connotation of frightening abnormality from 'bejesus'

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Cheerdiction

Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [cheer-dik-shuhn]

Sentence: I realized I had a problem after my third hour in the shopping mall. I hadn't eaten, I hadn't slept and I was dressed in the same velour track suit I had worn the day before. My cheerdiction was out of control. I didn't want to leave, I didn't want to stay, and I knew I had a problem, but the cheerdiction kept me going. I could buy one more present, the perfect present, the sparkliest, most flawless, joy inducing present I had ever given.

Etymology: From "cheer" meaning to gladden or cause joy to and "addiction" meaning the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.

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Ghoulcarding

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: gool/card/ing

Sentence: On Christmas Eve the malls are filled with people ghoulcarding, buying anything and everything in sight and willing to kill and eat flesh for it.

Etymology: GHOULCARDING from - GOLD CARD (a credit card with a high credit rating and with the privilege of being eaten alive by the interest rates) + GHOUL (an evil spirit, or demon in folklore believed to plunder malls and feed on Christmas shoppers)

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Santasmerized

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: san-TAZ-mer-izd

Sentence: Once again the Christmas spirit had Leon absolutely Santasmerized, feeling the need to please everyone with lavish gifts, he seemed to be in a stupor and he was putting thousands of dollars he could ill afford on his credit card.

Etymology: Blend of 'Santa' and 'mesmerized' (Spellbound or enthralled. Hypnotized)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-14: 01:55:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen Thank you silveryaspen ~ James

silveryaspen - 2007-12-14: 14:44:00
Liked all the words!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-17: 01:26:00
Thank you silveryaspen for the great idea ~ James

silveryaspen - 2008-12-17: 19:12:00
Into the valley of malls, went the $5 hundreds ... It was the light of the charge brigade!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-18: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James