Verboticisms

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: duh rek shuns

Sentence: He normally followed all the duhrections, so when his newly acquired driving licence told him to tear along the dotted line....

Etymology: directions duh

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COMMENTS:

I\'ve seen a bunch of these guys out on the road. Nice! - artr, 2010-04-05: 07:25:00

Duhlicious word - Nosila, 2010-04-06: 00:14:00

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /kluht-struk-shuhns/

Sentence: The klutztructions that came with Donna's toaster said not to use a knife to pry out the toast if it got stuck, so she shrugged and grabbed a fork instead.

Etymology: klutz - a stupid or foolish person(from Yiddish, klots "clumsy person") + instructions (from Latin, instructus "to put in order")

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dədirekshənz

Sentence: There are directions on products that make sense. Then there are duhrections that pluck at the nerves of the consumers who use them. ”Do not take internally” on shampoo; ”Keep hands and feet clear of spinning blade” on a lawn mower; ”contents may be hot” on a cup of coffee; DUHrections!

Etymology: duh (used to comment on an action perceived as foolish or stupid) + directions (instructions on how to reach a destination or about how to do something)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: binstrəkshənz

Sentence: Many products come with grinstructions, directions that are so ludicrous that you have to laugh. Others, especially those from power tools, have grimstructions with their graphic depictions of severed limbs. Ultimately all are binstructions, destined or a quick trip to the recycle container.

Etymology: bin (a receptacle in which to deposit trash or recyclables) + instructions (detailed information telling how something should be done, operated, or assembled)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dəlābəl

Sentence: As Jerry got ready for work he noticed that everything he picked up had a duhlabel on it, from the shampoo he wasn't supposed to drink to the electric appliances that were not to join him in the tub; from the razor that was a hazard because it was sharp to the Q-tip that wasn't intended to go in his ear (then why are they shaped like that?) He wondered to himself just how anybody could get safely through their day without these "pearls of wisdom". Of course, Jerry might be a bit slow. It took him 38 years to notice them in the first place.

Etymology: duh (exclamation: used to comment on an action perceived as foolish or stupid) + label (a small piece of paper, fabric, plastic, or similar material attached to an object and giving information about)

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Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: duh-reck-shuns

Sentence: It seems evident to me that one shouldn't place their bare hand directly into a running snow blower, but apparently all of the visitors to my emergency room that come in with missing fingers due to doing just that failed to read the clearly marked duhrections on the side of the machine.

Etymology: duh + directions

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COMMENTS:

This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00

This is perfect - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:46:00

Very good!! - Mustang, 2008-11-05: 19:49:00

Duhlightful! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:58:00

But duh snow wasn't coming out! Love your word! - artr, 2008-11-06: 07:46:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sad vice

Sentence: When self-evident, oxymoron warnings on packaging actually are needed for some dumb people, it is actually sadvice. But then again, why do they put electrical outlets beside showers in bathrooms anyway?

Etymology: Sad (pathetic,bad,unfortunate) & Advice (a proposal for an appropriate course of action)

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Created by: paintergrl1313

Pronunciation: No-sho

Sentence: These hair dryer instructions are common sense, a real knowshow.

Etymology: To show someone what they should already know. Also a play on no show, cause anyone that needs a knowshow has no show common sense.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: heed full things

Sentence: Sandy was in for a shock because she failed to believe the heedfulthings written on her blowdryer!

Etymology: heedful things (like needful things)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: dull-LIT-er-uh-chur

Sentence: When she saw the instructions on her hair dryer warning her not to use it while sleeping or in the shower, amd the notation on the package of chips to 'open package, eat chips' Stephanie was once again reminded of all the dulliturature she'd encountered on other similar (usually imported) products.

Etymology: Blend of 'dull' (mentally slow; lacking brightness of mind; somewhat stupid; obtuse) and 'literature' (any kind of printed material, as circulars, leaflets, or handbills etc)

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COMMENTS:

Dullectable - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 22:01:00

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