Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Fileusion
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun
Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!
Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)
Evidesk
Created by: bookwerm18
Pronunciation: Eh-vee-deh-sk
Sentence: The pile of evidesks on my table collapsed today, demonstrating how overworked I actually am.
Etymology: Evidence + Desk
Earpencil
Created by: texmom
Pronunciation: Eer pen sill
Sentence: He wandered around with an earpencil as if he were doing math.
Etymology: ear - yeah the body part pencil - simple graphic tool
Bogustrive
Created by: kendriveset
Pronunciation: bo-ga-strive
Sentence: Jim took more effort to bogustrive around the office than it would\'ve taken to actually do some work.
Etymology: bogus + strive
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COMMENTS:
good one - Nosila, 2010-01-07: 18:50:00
thanks so much - kendriveset, 2010-01-08: 15:48:00
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Fauxsimile
Created by: ryanpetie
Pronunciation: foh-sim-ill-lay
Sentence: Darren gathered his fauxsimiles and strode around the office like a man possessed. 'A few more laps,' he thought, 'and I could be managing partner.'
Etymology: faux/facsimile
Officade
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: aw-fuh-sahd
Sentence: Stanley likes to make everybody think he is the most productive member of his team. He creates a smokescreen by creating an officade of papers and folders that practically obscure his window and keep prying eyes from seeing how little actual work he does.
Etymology: office (a room, set of rooms, or building where the business of a commercial or industrial organization or of a professional person is conducted) + facade (a superficial appearance or illusion of something)
Phantofiles
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: fan/toe/files
Sentence: Joe had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's been working on six different projects today and it's only noon." Joe's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.
Etymology: PHANTOFILES - noun - from PHANTOM (an appearance, or illusion without material substance) + FILES (a container, or folder for keeping papers in order)
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COMMENTS:
I worked with a guy that did that...he got away with it until his new female boss figured him out and gave him the boot! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 00:50:00
pesty female bosses! - scrabbelicious, 2008-08-06: 06:43:00
What datum lurks in the hearts of men?Only the Phantofile knows. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 11:25:00
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Assumetote
Created by: jadenguy
Pronunciation: as OOM tot
Sentence: Like a vampire hunter to the cross, he lept across his cubicle and grabbed a stack of printed material on company letterhead as his boss approached; his assumetote being just enough of a ruse to confuse his superior for perhaps another week. His smokescreen-jobsaver spreadsheet was already drawing suspicion as to exactly how much time he spent playing internet word games!
Etymology: assume + tote + asymptote assume (people assume you are working ) + tote (to carry) + asymptote (to infinitely approach something (work))
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COMMENTS:
yeah, like people play internet word games at work! implausible. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:40:00
Can I have a copy of that spreadsheet? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 13:52:00
you come up with very creative sentences jadenguy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00
i try. i try. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 17:12:00
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Figmendation
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: fig men day shun
Sentence: As a long time civil servant in the federal Department of the Obscure and Forgotten Files, Roger was the King of the Toadies. He spent his entire workday carrying around a file folder which was labelled S.M.A.R.T. It looked very official and proved to the innocent bystander or visitor that Roger was a man with a special mission and purpose in his work. In fact the S.M.A.R.T. File was a figmendation. It usually contained a crossword puzzle or scratch & win cards, which Roger would spend his days at work playing. His co-workers thought that the S.M.A.R.T. stood for Segregated Modules Actualizing Relative Theory. In fact, the S.M.A.R.T. acronym actually stood for See Me Avoiding Real Toil. Yes, Roger was also known by his more popular nickname: The SmartFile Dodger!
Etymology: figment (a contrived or fantastic idea, i.e: a figment of the imagination) & mendacious (intentionally untrue;lying)
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COMMENTS:
Did Riger work at the Texas Blog Suppository? Ya crack me up, Nose! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:37:00
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Antiworkaid
Created by: weareallbeautiful
Pronunciation: ah-n-tee-w-urk-ay-d
Sentence: Bill always carried his antiwork aid in order to avoid having to actually work at the office.
Etymology: anti+work+aid
Comments:
The "S" in Timothy Johnson's GUST stands for Strategy. And strategy is key! Especially if you are trying to get way with doing nothing. Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram and Timothy! ~ James
Rebekah - 2009-11-05: 18:33:00
Protaskinate
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James