Verboticisms

Created by: ryanpetie

Pronunciation: foh-sim-ill-lay

Sentence: Darren gathered his fauxsimiles and strode around the office like a man possessed. 'A few more laps,' he thought, 'and I could be managing partner.'

Etymology: faux/facsimile

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Created by: jadenguy

Pronunciation: as OOM tot

Sentence: Like a vampire hunter to the cross, he lept across his cubicle and grabbed a stack of printed material on company letterhead as his boss approached; his assumetote being just enough of a ruse to confuse his superior for perhaps another week. His smokescreen-jobsaver spreadsheet was already drawing suspicion as to exactly how much time he spent playing internet word games!

Etymology: assume + tote + asymptote assume (people assume you are working ) + tote (to carry) + asymptote (to infinitely approach something (work))

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COMMENTS:

yeah, like people play internet word games at work! implausible. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:40:00

Can I have a copy of that spreadsheet? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 13:52:00

you come up with very creative sentences jadenguy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

i try. i try. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 17:12:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: prahp- cue - pie

Sentence: Looking over his desk, John wondered which of his propcupies to bring with him on his daily walk to the vending machine. He knew he had to walk with pace and urgency to develop the right volume of sweat on his brow, but also the right iPad, laptop, red binder, 90's beeper, bluetooth, box labeled "Fragile" combo was key to success.

Etymology: Prop - occupy

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Created by: ziggy41

Pronunciation: Prop-kyu-pide

Sentence: To avoid obtaining any more work from her boss that day, she used her clever wit to propccupy herself with a dead beatle and a piece of bagel.

Etymology: Prop (an object) + occupied (busy)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: aw-fuh-sahd

Sentence: Stanley likes to make everybody think he is the most productive member of his team. He creates a smokescreen by creating an officade of papers and folders that practically obscure his window and keep prying eyes from seeing how little actual work he does.

Etymology: office (a room, set of rooms, or building where the business of a commercial or industrial organization or of a professional person is conducted) + facade (a superficial appearance or illusion of something)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: mask/ur/aid

Sentence: No one knew which department he worked in but with his maskqueraid of blackbery and wireless headset he easily passed his day wandering and betting on horses.

Etymology: masquerade + mask + aid

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COMMENTS:

great word and welcome back! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 21:53:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Fy-el-o-foe

Sentence: Tarquin never went anywhere without his fileofaux, he wanted everyone to think he was extremely busy doing a very important job, when really he was just loafing around doing as little as possible.

Etymology: File(a folder for keeping loose papers in order) + Faux(artificial,imitation) ORIGIN French false = Fileofaux. See also filofax(a loose-leaf notebook for recording notes) ORIGIN representing a colloquial pronunciation of file of facts

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COMMENTS:

Fawny collision of meanings there TJ. Good word! - scrabbelicious, 2008-08-06: 06:48:00

File a foe under fiendish! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:25:00

Great minds think alike...I had toyed with that word as well...isn't that fauxbulous! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 21:52:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: DOCK-yew-flawj

Sentence: Harper fancied himself a very clever tactician, using an old empty attache case as docuflage, believing that coworkers were convinced that he was actually packing a large work schedule, though everyone in the office had been on to his scam for years.

Etymology: Blend of the words 'document' (various paperwork) and 'camouflage' (a device or stratagem used for concealment)

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