Verboticisms

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ass/tun/aj/ment

Sentence: She gasped with asstonnagemnet when she tried to sit in her favourite chair and found she couldn't fit any longer - so much for those protein bars.

Etymology: ass + tonnage + astonishment

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COMMENTS:

HA! Good one! Quite cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 07:19:00

Laughing so hard I can barely type! Funtastic Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:30:00

Thanks a ton! You made my day! - Jamagra, 2008-03-19: 14:12:00

His day of astonement will suely come! Nice blend of words. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-20: 05:05:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: GURTH-kuh.m-stansz

Sentence: Bob used every motivational tool and slimming trick out there in endeavouring to be trim, taut and terrific. And he believed that it was only a matter of time before he hit upon the right formula to overcome his adipose issue. However, friends discovered the unhoggable truth about his girthumstances; when, at 2am, they spotted him, somnambulatory, at his local all-night eatery, flaboyant in his dressing gown and slippers, ordering for himself enough food to feed a family of ten.

Etymology: Conflation of GIRTH:the distance around a persons body & CIRCUMSTANCES:The surrounding or pertaining facts, means, influences, etc.,especially asrelated to one's/ones support and way of living.

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COMMENTS:

Girth is a great word ... rounds off your creation very nicely! Outstanding Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:10:00

love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-19: 11:48:00

Great word Oz! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:57:00

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Created by: lplybon

Pronunciation: "Fat-SI-tees"

Sentence: Over the past four months -- after her doctor scared the beejeesus out of her -- Sophie has religiously exercised, watched what she eats, and even goes to those (sometimes really irritating) support groups. And the result? A total loss of three stinking pounds. And to add insult to injury, Sophie notices that her fascites seems to have grown! How can that be!?!

Etymology: Combination of the word "fat" and "ascites"

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: FAL-OR-EES

Sentence: These 100 calorie packs have added like 500 phalories on me!

Etymology: Phantom Calories

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COMMENTS:

I've never seen a calorie, never felt one, so I think phalories is a perfect word for them! Well done! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 20:31:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: so fa no gud

Sentence: Dwight's campaign motto to lose weight was (sofasogood) but it was turning into (sofanogood) due to his unexpected weight gain on lettuce leaves alone in the first week.

Etymology: So far so good (optimistic) & Sofa (couch) no good (not for weight loss, anyway!)

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Created by: moondragon

Pronunciation: fit-nuh-glitch

Sentence: There must be some kind of fitneglitch in this exercise plan. My daily work out just seems to make my love handles bigger.

Etymology: A combination of fitness (health) + glitch (error).

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: stellth-food

Sentence: The scale gave a small muffled electronic scream when Andy brought his full weight to bear. He was just about done with trying to shape up; two weeks of treadmill and proper diet had led to a 5-pound gain. Unfortunately, Andy had been mistaken in his meal-selecting logic, and all of the sensible meals he had recently consumed were in fact stealthfoods. The 8-oz portion of fish the night before, for example, had come from an Eastern Stoned Lardwrasse. After a lazy afternoon on the reef smoking reefer, the fish had consumed a bag of Funyuns, 3 Big Macs, 2 orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a carton of Haagen Daazs. Leaving his friends laughing in his enormous wake, calling him names like "Marlin Brando", the lardwrasse had groggily stumbled into a waiting net, his certain doom, and another veneer of fat on Andy's barely denim-constrained buttocks.

Etymology: stealth + food; ala healthfood

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COMMENTS:

What a witty twist to come up with an eat-it-self-to-death fish that packs weight on humans! Topped off with a meaning full great pun! Excellent Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:06:00

Now I know why I almost bought that bag of Bloomin' Onion Crisps at the store tonight. Bastard Banky! (Sorry James!) Nice word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:55:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: rē-inkärbnāshən

Sentence: It wasn't his fault. It was a matter of reincarbnation. The more Phat thought about it the more he believed in regirth. He must have been a sumo in a former life or perhaps a large animal. That would explain the hippobottomus. It was all in his jeans. After another fruitless trip to the gym, he went out and bought another pair of elepants.

Etymology: reincarnation (a person or animal in whom a particular soul is believed to have been reborn) + carb (short for carbohydrate)

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COMMENTS:

Love them elepants. - wayoffcenter, 2009-01-09: 06:34:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-01-09: 09:53:00

Love it and the story...so deja vu, all over again! - Nosila, 2009-01-09: 19:51:00

Super punsome and funsome! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-09: 20:45:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hek sir syes

Sentence: Although he exercised regularly and ate properly, Tim felt that someone had cursed him. This hexercise prevented his losing any weight. He was mystified, as he had cut back his donuts to just the one dozen per day. How much more sacrificing could he be expected to do???

Etymology: Hex (cast a spell over someone or something; put a hex on someone or something) & Exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: Inch ah dent uls

Sentence: One of life's pleasures, is to sup well. Just because one cannot see calories, any more than one can see heavy sighs, they calorsize us, by inchidentals. Inchidentals that are seen all to well, but make us feel less than well. Well! Well! Well! ... hmmmm that's another deep subject ... I don't want to get into ... so fare thee well.

Etymology: INCH, INCIDENTAL. INCH - unit of measurement, used not only to measure a body's height, but also the girths of chests, waists, upper arms, and thighs. INCIDENTAL - occurring by chance or without intention.

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COMMENTS:

love it! - galwaywegian, 2009-01-09: 12:28:00

Inchtriguing word...cute! - Nosila, 2009-01-09: 19:52:00

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