Verboticisms

Created by: zxvasdf

Pronunciation: Cir cum fail urence

Sentence: When the vein in his head popped out of place after a long bout of circumfailurence, he handed the jar to his wife who opened it easily. "I loosened it for you," he boasted.

Etymology: Circumference (the size of something as given by the distance around it) & failure (not successful)

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COMMENTS:

love the sentence - Jabberwocky, 2008-09-26: 15:06:00

Happens everyday in households round the world... - Nosila, 2008-09-26: 20:21:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: jahr-CHAH-chah

Sentence: Bob found himself totally in a jarchacha, when in front of Mrs Sanchez, who he wanted to emundorosape perfectly, even to her love of Latin-American dancing and body-building, he couldn't, despite straining every muscle, open a jar of gerkins.

Etymology: Blend of Jar & Cha-Cha

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-09-26: 15:00:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rist sist

Sentence: Stanley could normally open anything but this pickle jar was determined to wristsist all his efforts. Try as he mite, he could not open it. What he did not realize was that he had met the leader of the Wristsistance in his fridge, Colonel Cornichon. The Colonel had dilliberately held his position and mobilized his highly trained commandos, The Gherkins, to hold off Stanley's attacks. When Stanley held their stronghold under hot water and tapped it with a knife, the Colonel knew the siege was almost over and mustard his courage and sent out an SOS (Sweet or Sour) signal: "Mayo-day, Mayo-day, we don't relish this a salt. Although we've worked hard for our bread and butter, pickles, it is time to use our brines and admit defeat, since wristsistance is futile and sing the old war songs. 'Goodbye, Piccallili, Farewell Leicester Square, it's a long, long way to sip a sherry, but my heart's right there'. Dill we meet again, in the Alimentary Canal, I salute you."

Etymology: Wrist (a joint between the distal end of the radius and the proximal row of carpal bones) & Resist (refuse to comply;withstand the force of something;elude, especially in a baffling way)

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COMMENTS:

Can't open the pickle jar? No big dill! Great paranomasiac story... - LoftyDreamer, 2008-09-29: 20:23:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: her-nee-ya-met-ic

Sentence: Roger needed surgery due to a pickle jar that was herniametically sealed because he wanted to prove to Carol that he was still virile. As he lay panting and in pain on the ground, Carol held the jar under running hot water, tapped it once or twice with a knife and it opened without effort. Then she called an ambulance.

Etymology: hernia: rupture or protrusion of an organ of the body or part of the body structure through the wall that normally contains it + hermetic: completely sealed, especially against the escape or entry of air; impervious against outside influences or interference

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COMMENTS:

cute word - Nosila, 2010-02-25: 11:12:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dil fik ultee

Sentence: Who knew getting Herb to open a jar of pickles could end up being such a dillficulty? His caper started when Madge asked him to turn the lid. He used such force that he broke off the top and the contents landed on the floor. He turned something that should be dillicious into something dillsastrous.

Etymology: Dill (pickle preserved in brine or vinegar flavored with dill seed)& Difficulty (a factor causing trouble in achieving a positive result or tending to produce a negative result)

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Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: kən-Tawrk

Sentence: As I watched my girlfriend contorque to open the jar of peanut butter, I thought to myself, “This is not 'good' naked.”

Etymology: Latin contorquēre Latin torques

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: S

Sentence: Henry, despite all his schroucherization, could not budge the cap from Helen's bottle of nail polish remover.

Etymology:

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Created by: svnfsvn

Pronunciation: twist tos terone

Sentence: my twisterone wasnt enough to impress my girlfriend.

Etymology: to twist testosterone

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COMMENTS:

Perfect! - ErWenn, 2007-10-31: 01:11:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: järzilə

Sentence: John is often called upon to do battle with jarzilla. His manhood is truly challenged when he can’t get a simple pickle jar open. The insult is even worse when his petite wife opens one with ease. He always claims he had it 90% open when she got it.

Etymology: jar (a wide-mouthed, cylindrical container made of glass or pottery, esp. one used for storing food.) + Godzilla (prehistoric monster featured in a series of Japanese films from 1955)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: twist/zur/shun

Sentence: Joe's twenty minute twistertion with the mustard jar ended with him smashing it on the kitchen floor and angerily yelling, "I got the #@&^*ing jar open, honey."

Etymology: TWISTERTION - from TWIST (to cause to move with a rotary motion) + EXERTION (vigorous action, or effort)

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