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'Oh no! I hate it when my husband tries to dress me!'

DEFINITION: v., To carefully place a lid on a bottle, especially a salad dressing bottle, so that it appears closed and will not spill unless the bottle is moved or shaken. n., A bottle which has been prepared in such a manner.

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Verboticisms

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Condement

Created by: FreakyDeak

Pronunciation: kän-dɪ-mənt

Sentence: Even the word condement felt slippery in her brain as she fell victim to the unyielding ketchup.

Etymology: condiment (topping or dressing) + dement (to make insane)

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COMMENTS:

Not to mention "con", as in to fool someone. - artr, 2013-01-08: 07:16:00

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Salambush

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: Sa-lam-bush

Sentence: Carmen found a salambush waiting for her in the kitchen; the lid on the salad dressing looked screwed on but wasn't. Was it an accident, or was someone at the party deliberately trying to stain her?

Etymology: Salad and Ambush

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Shookenfreude

Created by: pungineer

Pronunciation: Shoe/ken/froy/duh

Sentence: Part of the Nazis' dastardly masterplan to conquer America during WW2 was to spread confusion and terror across the land by recruiting waitresses to act as Shookenfreuders

Etymology: Shook (as in all shook up) + Schadenfreude (to take pleasure in the misfortunes of others mwah ha ha ha etc)

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COMMENTS:

now that's clever!! - libertybelle, 2007-10-23: 09:14:00

Thanks, i'm liking yours too, sounds more exciting than a caesar salad somehow.. - pungineer, 2007-10-23: 09:19:00

Thanks, i'm liking yours too, sounds more exciting than a caesar salad somehow.. - pungineer, 2007-10-23: 09:26:00

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Acciwaitohappen

Created by: hiladizzle

Pronunciation: axi-wait-oo-happen

Sentence: The way that bottle is sitting is an acciwaitohappen.

Etymology: Derived from the phrase "accident waiting to happen".

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Kapsplatter

Created by: Chickp

Pronunciation: Cap/splatter

Sentence: The lid was just loose enough that I was kapsplattered with Thousand Island Dressing when I shoke the bottle

Etymology: Cap+splatter

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Pseudoseal

Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Once again, he pseudosealed the salad dressing, so that when she picked it up, it spilled all over her blouse.

Etymology: pseudo (fake/false) seal (to cover)

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Seasonfling

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: see/zon/fling

Sentence: "Would you care for a little seasonfling on your salad?" asked the perfect hostess as she accidentally spewed the entire bottle of salad dressing all over her guests.

Etymology: seasoning + fling

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COMMENTS:

Great! - TJayzz, 2008-09-19: 09:57:00

Sounds like a salad tossin' spring break - zxvasdf, 2008-09-21: 21:22:00

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Bleusneeze

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bloōsnēz

Sentence: Bill thought he’d play his famous bleusneeze prank on his new girlfriend, leaving the cap loosened on the bottle of salad dressing so that she would spray it all over herself when she shook it. The joke was just as funny (or funnier) when she reached for the bottle, tipped it over and spilled the contents in Bill’s lap. Unsure if she did it on purpose or not, he quietly screwed the lids back on the salt and pepper shakers.

Etymology: bleu cheese (cheese containing veins of blue mold, such as Gorgonzola and Danish Blue) + sneeze (make a sudden involuntary expulsion of air from the nose and mouth due to irritation of one’s nostrils)

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