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'Oh no! I hate it when my husband tries to dress me!'

DEFINITION: v., To carefully place a lid on a bottle, especially a salad dressing bottle, so that it appears closed and will not spill unless the bottle is moved or shaken. n., A bottle which has been prepared in such a manner.

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Verboticisms

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Heinzed

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Hi-nzzzz'd (something like that)

Sentence: Shaking the bottle, Lilly was about to taste the 58th variety ... SPLAT! She'd been Heinzed.

Etymology: Heinz - The sauce manufacturer

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Vinairegret

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: vina/regret

Sentence: A favourite cafeteria joke is vinairegret which involves replacing the lids on salad dressing with larger ones - especially appreciated by dry cleaners.

Etymology: vinaigrette + regret

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COMMENTS:

petaj Gar!lick at that! Beaten to it on the vinegar-based dressing theme. - petaj, 2007-10-23: 08:23:00

Spicey! - purpleartichokes, 2007-10-23: 11:51:00

Vinnie regrets doing this to me because I've capunked him with vengence threefold. - Stevenson0, 2007-10-23: 12:32:00

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Fauxclosure

phild3791

Created by: phild3791

Pronunciation: \ˈfō\ˈklō-zhər\

Sentence: Phil hadn’t realized he was a victim of Fauxclosure until it was too late and his shirt was ruined.

Etymology: Faux: French, false. Closure : an act of closing : the condition of being closed

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COMMENTS:

BWAHAHAHA! I Love this! - Lolagrrl, 2007-10-23: 10:11:00

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Sneaksauce

Created by: mayblossom

Pronunciation: snee-k-sauce

Sentence: exmple:"ahh! Helen left the ketchup sneaksauced again!"

Etymology: when sneaky people tamper with the sauces

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Howgrossman

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: howww growww smann

Sentence: Her frenzied shaking of the howgrossman bottle left thousand island dressing dressing the island in the kitchen

Etymology: how gross lloyd grossman sauce

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Capunked

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ka/punk/ed

Sentence: Jeremy capunked three different people at dinner last night leaving ketchup, mustard and oil and vinegar on the walls, ceiling and floors, not to mention his victims.

Etymology: cap + punked

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COMMENTS:

very funny!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-23: 12:09:00

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Vinairegrette

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: vin ee re gret

Sentence: Rosemary knew that her husband Basil was up to his old tricks again. Despite his being warned of the consequences. When she went to take out the salad dressing from the fridge, he had loosened the lid so that she would have a vinairegrette if she tried to shake the bottle. Luckily she was on to him and decided that payback was long overdue. She would artichoke him, then beet him, pepper him with a salt and they'd eventually find his chard romaines in her backyard, where there was not mushroom. Yes, Basil would vinairegrette his capers and rue the day he'd given Rosemary such a hard thyme!

Etymology: Vinaigrette (oil and vinegar salad dressing with mustard and garlic) & Regret (feel remorse for; feel sorry for; be contrite about)

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Condement

Created by: FreakyDeak

Pronunciation: kän-dɪ-mənt

Sentence: Even the word condement felt slippery in her brain as she fell victim to the unyielding ketchup.

Etymology: condiment (topping or dressing) + dement (to make insane)

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COMMENTS:

artr Not to mention "con", as in to fool someone. - artr, 2013-01-08: 07:16:00

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Vinairegrette

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: vin eh ree gret

Sentence: Lettuce reinact the crime. Rosie Roquefort had gone to the fridge cos she wanted to romaine slim by eating a healthy salad. She combined the vegetable ingredients and tossed them into the salad bowl. She retraced her steps back to the fridge to get a bottle of salad dressing. From the array in the door, she pondered whether to pick Paul Newman or something more Krafty as her choy-ce, checking for expiry dates. She picked a bottle of vinaigrette and took it over to shake and pour over her salad. Only she had picked a bottle of vinairegrette instead... because when she tried to shake it, the entire contents of the full bottle sprayed all over her, her kitchen and everything in it. The Usual Suspect, her husband, Basil Roguefort came to mind. Her suspicions were confirmed when she spotted him rolling on the dining room floor with laughter and the video camera in his hand. The beet cobbs would turnip later when she caught Basil and tried to artichoke him. The CSI(Criminal Salad Investigators) measured the spatter patterns and chard the trajectories. Basil was collard when his fingerprints were found all over the bottle and lid of the dressing. He was charged with bottle-ism, a rare form of vandalism involving bottles. Rosie was charged with attempted manslawter. When the case came to court, Rosie beet the wrap because the vegetarian judge thought she got a raw deal. The judge tossed out the salad case, as there was mushroom for doubt. Rosie was later featured on the Okra Winfrey show and has now optioned her life story in a book called "Salad Days"...she will never have to earn a celery again. Basil romaines in custody where he has found Judaism and plans to become a kohlrabi.

Etymology: Vinaigrette (a salad dressing with oil and vinegar as well as mustard and garlic) & Regret (sadness associated with some wrong done or some disappointment)

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Lobottlemee

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Lo-bottle-me

Sentence: When she shook the catsup bottle the lid flew off, catsup slattered her forehead giving her a frontal lobottlemee

Etymology: Lobotomy + bottle

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-23: 02:57:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-23: 08:19:00
Definitely Krafty behaviour!

remistram - 2007-10-23: 09:52:00
I had to marry the loose lidder...I'm a shake first, tight lidder thus the birth of this definition.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-23: 10:19:00
Time to throttle the bottler? ~ James

galwaywegian - 2008-09-19: 06:29:00

galwaywegian - 2008-09-19: 06:30:00
very high standard so far today!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-18: 00:36:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James