Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon vik tim ize ashun

Sentence: It was pre-ordained. His name was Rob and by gosh, that is what he did for a living. He also wrote very bad checks. When he was caught and sentenced to 25 years in the pokey, he thought he had fallen prey to convictimization. He was incarcerated at Sing Sing, where contrary to the name, they did not sing, often or well. Warden Gordon Borden thought it would be ironic if Rob wrote the new Prison Newsletter, since he was so good at writing (bad checks). Rob called this literary marvel, "Sentences" and worked hard at it to make it informative and entertaining. He carried regular features, such as a column on advice to the lovelorn..."In-Mates" with such pertinent features as "Are you suffering from Penal Dysfunction?";The Daily Horrorscope ("Your life has settled into predictable routine but just wait, the new screw in Cell Block 4 has his eye on you. Prepare for excitement."); a singles column "Cell-ABC" and recipes from the prison kitchen, "The Garden of Pleadin'" ...for Chili CON carney...take 500 pounds of ground meat, throw in 18 cups of saltpeter,...etc. He also added news items that affected his readership: "Care and feeding of your pet Cockroach"; and he used the digital camera to get candid snaps of daily life column, "I've been framed". Rob became a publishing ty-con and made the most of his pun-nishment!

Etymology: Convict (a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison; a person who has been convicted of a criminal offence; find or declare guilty) & Victimization (adversity resulting from being made a victim; an act that exploits or victimizes someone (treats them unfairly))

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COMMENTS:

written with conviction!! - galwaywegian, 2009-03-06: 05:56:00

Top Notch Job creating this 'con' job and 'con' verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:15:00

So funny!!! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:30:00

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Created by: Ratty

Pronunciation: f-UN-ish-ment

Sentence: Barry's drunk mother (who had a high well-paid job in court) simply had to do something as a punishment after Barry chopped both her arms off. When Barry got a final sentence of doing community service for the most ridiculously generous rich old lady, his mother realized her rather regretful punishment was in fact a funishment.

Etymology: fun, punishment

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fel-ehn-ELL-eh-vayt

Sentence: The jury was certain the judge had come completely unhinged when he decided to felonelevate the punishment of Winston and sentenced him to a year in jail for littering.

Etymology: Blend of 'felon' (person convicted of a felony) and 'elevate' (raise).

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: siss eeeeeeeee feye nnnnh

Sentence: He walked into judge Draco's courtroom with the sinking feeling that a sissyfine decision was on its way.

Etymology: fine, Sisyphean challenge" "wikipedia" As a punishment from the gods for his trickery, Sisyphus was compelled to roll a huge rock up a steep hill, but before he could reach the top of the hill, the rock would always roll back down again, forcing him to begin again.[2] The maddening nature of the punishment was reserved for Sisyphus due to his hubristic belief that his cleverness surpassed that of Zeus.

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COMMENTS:

oooh!! very cerebral today - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-06: 09:38:00

Wow! Sissyfine was just fine as a simple combine of sissy and fine and a great create. Then I read the etymology, enjoyed the Greek myth new to me. Not quite an eponym for you spelled it differently from the Greek, but that just made it better. Double meanings are not easily created. Absolutely Brilliant! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:30:00

Very clever! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:20:00

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: dra-COMIC-are-sur-AY-shun (DRACOMICARCERATE)

Sentence: Judge Mentill-Case was not elected. He was a political apointee who wielded his gavel with wild abandon. Ever since his pet pug was flattened by a Lexus, he delighted in enforcing the hamlet's no-cell-phone driving ordinance. His punishment for a first offender was removal of all glass on the vehicle. Second offense entailed driving with snow chains on all four tires for a year. Third offense was DRACOMICARCERATION-confinement to a Volkswagon Beetle with the doors welded shut. The Judge's career ended when he crashed into a Starbuck's while texting.

Etymology: DRAconic+COMIc+inCARCERATION= DRACOMICARCRATION.....DRACONIC:of, relating to, or characteristic of Draco or the severe code of laws held to have been framed by him; Latin Dracon-, Draco, from Greek Drakōn Draco (Athenian lawgiver).....COMIC: causing laughter or amusement, funny, of, relating to, or marked by comedy; Latin comicus, from Greek kōmikos, from kōmos revel(1576).....INCARCERATE: to subject to confinement, to put in prison, to punish; Latin incarceratus, past participle of incarcerare, from in- + carcer prison Date: 1560,

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COMMENTS:

Here come da Judge...cute story. It took a latte to get rid of that judge! - Nosila, 2009-03-06: 18:42:00

Great triple word play! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:49:00

Thanks, kids! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 20:46:00

THE BEARS' "CAR CAUGHT FIRE" WINS ALBUM OF THE YEAR AT THE CINCINNATI ENTERTAINMENT AWARDS. On November 26, 2001, just 4 years after being inducted into CEA's Hall of Fame, the Bears won Album Of The Year for Car Caught Fire. Rob Fetters and Bob Nyswonger accepted the award shortly after Rob's solo performance of the Bears' "As You Are". - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 22:39:00

www.thebearsmusic.com - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 22:40:00

LIVE IT or LIVE WITH IT! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 23:55:00

She was sick and tired of country life. A little country home, A little country folk, Made her blood run cold. Now her mother pines her heart away, Looking for her child in the big black smoke, In the big black smoke. Frailest, purest girl the world has seen, According to her Ma, according to her Pa, And everybody said, That she knew no sin and did no wrong, Till she walked the streets of the big black smoke, Of the big black smoke. Well, she slept in caffs and coffee bars and bowling alleys, And every penny she had Was spent on purple hearts and cigarettes. She took all her pretty coloured clothes, And ran away from home And the boy next door, For a boy named Joe. And he took her money for the rent And tried to drag her down in the big black smoke, In the big black smoke. In the big black smoke. In the big black smoke. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:39:00

Sorry about that. I got carried away. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:41:00

I'd like to thank the JAMES GANG for providing a very entertaining outlet for the mad ramblings of very talented people.. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:48:00

Hear, Hear, metro! It's great to tell people you are in a gang! Respect! - Nosila, 2009-03-08: 22:26:00

The creams rises to the TOP :) You're so creative Metrohumanx! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:05:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: nohn sen tensss

Sentence: the judge told the pervert that he would have to wash miss jones' underwear for a year. complete and utter nonsentence

Etymology: sentence, nonsense

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Created by: conflan

Pronunciation: n. mal'-ə-də-kwo-joo'-də-kət; v. mal'-ə-də-kwo-joo'-də-kate

Sentence: n. The O.J. Simpson trial was farcical, resulting as it did in an obvious maladaequojudicate. v. The teacher maladaequojudicated the student for eating in class with three years in an oubliette.

Etymology: mal: from French mal; from Latin male, meaning "badly." adaequo: from Latin adaequo, meaning "equalize" or "equal to the" judicate: from Medieval Latin judicatura, meaning "to judge" (judic-)+(-ate), a suffix occurring in loanwords from Latin.

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COMMENTS:

In the twitter bar, the word is mistyped: it's maladaequojudicate, not maladequojuzicate! Sorry. :-( - conflan, 2015-09-17: 19:11:00

Oops! It's also misspelled in the entry! - conflan, 2015-09-17: 19:14:00

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: pay a dox

Sentence: Today's legal system is broken, for the punishments do not fit white-collar crimes. Madoff runs a Ponzi scheme and instead of being in jail, he is in his million dollar penthouse. Even more absurd, he is not made to pay any restitution, he gets to keep the billions he stole! Ditto, for the criminal mismanagement of bank assets by bank management. In their case, it gets even more perverse, for they are given bail-em-out -billions, and are free to do it again! There are politicians who do not pay their taxes. Instead of jail time, the president perversely appoints them to high political office with good pay and big benefits. The payadox of today is white-collar crime does pay, and pays big!

Etymology: It is a paradox when the punishment doesn't fit the white-collar crime ... and when that white collar crime pays off big-time, it is a payadox! (In the fictionary {fiction-dictionary} a dox is the new human animal: a white-collar fox in sheep's clothing seeking out hi$ prey.)

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COMMENTS:

so true and so sad - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-06: 09:40:00

Good story...just sorry it is fact not fiction! - Nosila, 2009-03-06: 19:04:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: in - mate - tear - e - all

Sentence: After Barney jaywalked near the general store, Andy meted out a sentence that was inmaterial to the crime. He threw Barney in the slammer for three days....Barney got to see what it was like being an inmate, except that Aunt Bea brought him supper every evening.

Etymology: Inmate + Imaterial >> Inmate (convict: a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison) Imaterial (extraneous: not pertinent to the matter under consideration)

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COMMENTS:

love the Mayberry reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-06: 09:39:00

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Created by: tvguard

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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