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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Shrivelry

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: shriv el ree

Sentence: When he got caught twice in the revolving door after allowing his date to go through first, Lance A. Lott experienced the agony of shrivelry. Once a knight is enough.

Etymology: Shrivel (to wither;decrease in size,range or extent) & Chivalry (gallantry,courtesy,medieval principles of knighthood)

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Jesture

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: jest chur

Sentence: While trying to impress Inga on their first date, Jeremy used all his polite charms to ensure she thought him a true gentleman. Allowing her to go first buit trying to stay with her, he got caught in the fast moving doorway. Although his intention was good, his attention was not and he got caught in the door. "Son of a gun", she thought. "His jesture proved to me that he does not know how to handle a revolver. I guess he is not quite of the calibre I thought he should be".

Etymology: Jest (act in a funny or teasing way;activity characterized by good humor)& Gesture ( something done as an indication of intention;show, express or direct through movement)

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Missistance

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: mis-sis-tans

Sentence: When Cindy dropped her pencil Fred bent down to pick it up for her. The problem was that Cindy also bent to get it, and Fred ended up headbutting her in the nose. He's since learned not to offer his missistance to others.

Etymology: miss+assistance miss (To fail to accomplish or achieve) assistance (Aid, help)

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Whipgesture

Created by: runner

Pronunciation: wip jest your

Sentence: Ted suffered a painful whipgesture while trying to hold the door open for Lisa.

Etymology: whip: move briskly, gesture: an act toward another person

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Polchumpite

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: puhl-chuhmp-ahyt

Sentence: He wanted to offer his sobbing co-worker a tissue, and as he fumbled around to fetch one he mistakenly handed her his used up snot-ridden one thus adding himself to the roster of office polchumpites.

Etymology: polite + chump (as in oaf, klutz))

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Genteelgaffe

Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation:

Sentence: If it wasn't for his genteelgaffe, she might have spoken to him.

Etymology:

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Dorkalert

Created by: kimbo123

Pronunciation: Dork-Alert

Sentence: Once again, she fell victim of a Dorkalert.

Etymology:

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Adversassisty

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ad/vurs/assist/ee

Sentence: My well meaning offer of assistance quickly turned into an adversassisty as I slipped on the ice trying to help an elderly lady across the street. She fractured her hip and I bruised my ego.

Etymology: assist + Adverse (harmful, injurious) + adversity (mishap, misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

zxvasdf Ha Ha! I'd bruise my ego and shatter my own hip as well. - zxvasdf, 2008-09-24: 19:25:00

I like it:flows nicely. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-09-25: 18:19:00

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Misstention

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: miss ten shun

Sentence: Leonard always meant well, but in his hurry to impress the fairer sex, his good deeds turned into the misstention kind. His awkward attempts at basic gallantry often came back to bite him. For instance, he tried to impress Mary Jane, the cute new receptionist by holding the revolving door open, only to get his head caught in it. Then when they got up to the office, he leaned on the wall to talk to her and set off the fire alarm. The final misstention was when he bought her a nice hot latte and accidently spilled it all over her new dress, computer keyboard and important report the boss was waiting on. Yes, sometimes the road to Hell is indeed paved with misstentions...

Etymology: Miss (fail to perceive or to catch with the senses or the mind;fail to reach or get to) & Intention (an act of intending; a volition that you intend to carry out;an anticipated outcome that is intended or that guides your planned actions)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James