Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Tirate
Created by: yellowbird
Pronunciation: ty-rate
Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.
Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)
Caustomer
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer
Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.
Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)
Foolabluster
Created by: Redrover
Pronunciation: fool-uh-bluster
Sentence: Mark's earbuds are so small that his customers aren't even aware that he can't hear a single word of their foolablustering.
Etymology: fool= a silly or stupid person; a person who lacks judgment or sense bluster = noisy, empty threats or protests
Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Shades of "Crusty the Clown." Nicely blended. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:53:00
Good word - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:21:00
----------------------------
Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Cathareturn
Created by: zavijava
Pronunciation:
Sentence: After the 100th complaint that someone's Mii didn't love them anymore, Best Buy set up a separate line for people wanting to cathareturn things, with a pyschology student running customer service.
Etymology: catharsis+return Noun: Cathareturner
Tyranuservicevex
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: TYE-ran-UH-suhr-VIS-veks
Sentence: Bob, at first, an irebuyer, quickly became an tyranuservicevex, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.
Etymology: Blend of TYRANUS; SERVICE & VEX. Loosely based on Tyranusaurus Rex. This creature is probably the most famous and most fearsome predator of all times (Cretaceous, 85-65 million years ago), its name meaning 'terrible king lizard'. VEX: To make angry or annoyed by little provocations; to irritate; to plague; to torment; to harass; to afflict; to trouble;
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
wonderfully wacky - love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-13: 14:47:00
Very clever! - Mustang, 2008-11-13: 22:36:00
----------------------------
Whinestein
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne styne
Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!
Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00
Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00
Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00
----------------------------
Infergravation
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: In-fur-gra-VAY-shun
Sentence: Hubert thought he was very clever in using the tactic of infergravation, making phony claims about his computer's performance, in an effort to intimidate the technician and qet quicker service.
Etymology: Blend of 'infer' (to hint; imply; suggest) and 'aggravation' (annoyance; exasperation)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:54:00
----------------------------
Creepsumer
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: creep/zoom/er
Sentence: The worst job at Sears is the product return desk which attracts one creepsumer after another.
Etymology: CREEPSUMER noun - from CREEP (an annoyingly unpleasant, or repulsive person) + CONSUMER (one that acquires goods, or services for direct use )
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:51:00
Excellent - Mustang, 2008-11-13: 22:36:00
----------------------------
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James