Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Harasshole
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /hah-ras-hohl/
Sentence: Oscar had plenty of cars he needed to work on today, but for twenty minutes now he'd been stuck listening to some harasshole complain that the forty thousand mile warranty on his wife's car tires 'under normal driving conditions' should cover her repeatedly running over curbs, because, he claimed, that's how she normally drives.
Etymology: harass - to torment, as with troubles or cares; pester; persecute (Middle French, harasser "to harry") + asshole - a stupid, mean, or contemptible person, [or a donkey's poopchute, perhaps?] (Origin: 1350–1400; Middle English, arshole "anus")
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COMMENTS:
How funny!!! I can't stop laughing! Love the word, sentence and the description. Good one! - bananabender, 2008-01-16: 05:50:00
great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-01-16: 10:45:00
Funny and a great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:23:00
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Buyerliar
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: byer lyer
Sentence: Randy could always tell when the full moon approached...all the buyerliars in town came into his store to vent their spleens.
Etymology: Buyer & Liar
Cursetomer
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: kursstəmər
Sentence:
Etymology: From 'customer' - a person or company that buys goods or services; and 'curse' or 'cuss' - to utter obscenities or profanities.
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COMMENTS:
Or, better still, 'cusstomer', where the 'cuss' is pronounced with extra hissing sound. - logarithm, 2008-11-17: 05:53:00
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Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
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COMMENTS:
Maybe if they listen to the soft rock of "Bread" they won't be so crusty! Another great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:21:00
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Whinestein
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne styne
Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!
Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)
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COMMENTS:
You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00
Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00
Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00
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Counterattacker
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Cown-ter-at-aker
Sentence: Jerry was used to dealing with awkward customers, but when it came to Mr Pennyworth, the serial counterattacker, he was at a complete loss. Jerry dreaded the moment when he walked through the doors of his hardware shop. He never actually bought anything but he would continually come to the counter with various items and proceed to tell anyone who would listen that the products were inferior. He then ranted on that things were made to a much higher standard in his day and were made to last. Jerry was just grateful that Mr Pennyworth was well known for his rants all over town, and his other customers never took him seriously.
Etymology: Counter(a long flat-topped fitment over which goods are sold to customers) + Attacker(someone who takes agressive action) = Counterattacker
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COMMENTS:
Talk about a need for Counterintelligence! Good Word - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:43:00
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Shopabrawlic
Created by: rombus
Pronunciation: shop - a - brawl - ick
Sentence: John had a really nasty problem that he couldn't seem to control. He often got into intense arguments with shop clerks and check-out personnel in stores over everything from the prices of goods to their functionality. His shopabrawlic behavior was out of control and he couldn't seem to help himself. He felt so much better after an argument that he often bought things just for the thrill of the argument.
Etymology: The word shop (which means to purchase or look for) is combined with brawl (to quarrel angrily or disruptively). This is also kind of smashed in with alcoholic to denote an addiction to the behavior.
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COMMENTS:
very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-13: 14:47:00
Spot on. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:48:00
And the Shopabrawlics all come out at the full moon...oh, that's today! Good Word, timely. - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:48:00
Great! - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:23:00
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Paintron
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: payn tron
Sentence: Most customers are nice. They are happy you help them, grateful when you go out of your way to serve them. They are true patrons, they pay your wages. Then there is the paintron, he makes you earn your wages and then some. Although he is only one in a hundred, he makes noise and aggravation enough for the other ninety-nine. You may not remember all the nice ones, but you can never forget the bad ones. Thank goodness they are in the minority!
Etymology: Pain (emotional distress; a fundamental feeling that people try to avoid;a bothersome annoying person)& Patron (client, customer)
Tantrumonsters
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: tantrəmänstərs
Sentence: Reggie knew his day was shot when he saw them coming through the door. The tantrumonsters had arrived. The bus from the assisted-living home must have jettisoned its cargo. These three seemed to have nothing better to do than complain over minutia. He calls them T-Vex, Rageasaur and Triscarytops. This time he was ready for them. He threw up a bogo (buy one, get one) banner to momentarily distract them and made a dash for the stock room. It didn't take long for them to get bored and move onto another store and another customer service rep to gnaw on.
Etymology: Tantrum (an uncontrolled outburst of anger and frustration, typically in young child) + Monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)
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COMMENTS:
Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:50:00
Nice story....those dinosars put the "Sore" in Thesaurus! - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:46:00
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Tirate
Created by: yellowbird
Pronunciation: ty-rate
Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.
Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James