Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: payn tron

Sentence: Most customers are nice. They are happy you help them, grateful when you go out of your way to serve them. They are true patrons, they pay your wages. Then there is the paintron, he makes you earn your wages and then some. Although he is only one in a hundred, he makes noise and aggravation enough for the other ninety-nine. You may not remember all the nice ones, but you can never forget the bad ones. Thank goodness they are in the minority!

Etymology: Pain (emotional distress; a fundamental feeling that people try to avoid;a bothersome annoying person)& Patron (client, customer)

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Created by: Nuwanda

Pronunciation: lou-zer-air-er

Sentence: It never occurred to Melody that her computer problems might not actually be the fault of the poor guy at tech support who she berated daily. He tried, as politely as he could, to help her understand that her inability to turn on her computer was a losererror and not a hardware malfunction. Only after she accidentally stepped on the powerstrip and turned it back on did she stop calling the hapless support team.

Etymology: user error transformed into loser error.

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: in-FIR-meh-dayt

Sentence: Waldo would try to infermidate customer service clerks with belligerently exaggerated complaints about products or services.

Etymology: Blend of 'infer' (to hint; imply; suggest)and 'intimidate' (to make timid; fill with fear)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: whyne styne

Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!

Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)

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COMMENTS:

You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00

I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00

What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00

Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00

Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00

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Created by: courty3303

Pronunciation: sh-moo-sack

Sentence: I schmucacked that idiot.

Etymology:

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Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: graw bul

Sentence: Every time he was displeased with a purchase, Mike would grobble about his difficult life.

Etymology: grob, n., a petty complaint issued by whiny lips and registered by those who don't know better.

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fo - nee - stud

Sentence: Once again Edmund displayed his fauxnystud persona by making a huge fuss over a very small problem wih a purchase.

Etymology: Fauxny(phony) + stud (macho guy)

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COMMENTS:

Roared with laughter ... good one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 07:59:00

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur

Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.

Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)

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COMMENTS:

Maybe if they listen to the soft rock of "Bread" they won't be so crusty! Another great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:21:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Cown-ter-at-aker

Sentence: Jerry was used to dealing with awkward customers, but when it came to Mr Pennyworth, the serial counterattacker, he was at a complete loss. Jerry dreaded the moment when he walked through the doors of his hardware shop. He never actually bought anything but he would continually come to the counter with various items and proceed to tell anyone who would listen that the products were inferior. He then ranted on that things were made to a much higher standard in his day and were made to last. Jerry was just grateful that Mr Pennyworth was well known for his rants all over town, and his other customers never took him seriously.

Etymology: Counter(a long flat-topped fitment over which goods are sold to customers) + Attacker(someone who takes agressive action) = Counterattacker

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COMMENTS:

Talk about a need for Counterintelligence! Good Word - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:43:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: tantrəmänstərs

Sentence: Reggie knew his day was shot when he saw them coming through the door. The tantrumonsters had arrived. The bus from the assisted-living home must have jettisoned its cargo. These three seemed to have nothing better to do than complain over minutia. He calls them T-Vex, Rageasaur and Triscarytops. This time he was ready for them. He threw up a bogo (buy one, get one) banner to momentarily distract them and made a dash for the stock room. It didn't take long for them to get bored and move onto another store and another customer service rep to gnaw on.

Etymology: Tantrum (an uncontrolled outburst of anger and frustration, typically in young child) + Monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)

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COMMENTS:

Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:50:00

Nice story....those dinosars put the "Sore" in Thesaurus! - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:46:00

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