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'Nothing clever to say?'

DEFINITION: n. A clever remark, especially a "comeback line" to an insult, which does not come to mind until it is too late to be delivered; often leads to the gnashing of teeth. v. To think of something clever after it's too late.

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Verboticisms

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Lagbuttal

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˌlæɡˈbətl̩/

Sentence: Oddly enough, the infuriation factor of a lagbuttal seems to be inversely proportional to the length of time since the missed opportunity.

Etymology: From lag + rebuttal

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COMMENTS:

Def should be in common use. - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:49:00

Thanks. - ErWenn, 2007-04-04: 01:14:00

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Latealine

Created by: Dolraith

Pronunciation: Late-a-line

Sentence: The next day I had a latealine to her remark...

Etymology:

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Rejoinduh

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: re-join-der

Sentence: Bill's witty riposte to his annoying colleagues came too late. He'd fallen into the humiliating trap of failing to think of a witticism, only a rejoinduh.

Etymology: rejoinder (a reply, a riposte) + uh! (an exclamation used to indicate doubt or hesitation)

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Lollyjesting

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: lälējesting

Sentence: Harry*s repartee could use some tuning. He can generally think of something witty to say in response to another*s comment but his timing is a little off. His sexual innuendo was far less effective and just a little creepy once the group*s conversation had shifted from girlfriends to in-laws. His lollyjesting will often garner a responce of **Huh?**.

Etymology: lollygag (spend time aimlessly; idle) + jesting (a thing said or done for amusement; a joke)

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Tortard

zrotv

Created by: zrotv

Pronunciation: tōr'tärd

Sentence: Her insult was witty and cutting. I dug deep in my repertoire for an equally eloquent response, not wanting to defer to simple comments about her mother. Finally it came and I released it to the now distant and distancing back of her head. My lack of haste had resulted in the ever embarrassing tortardation. My weak totard fizzled on absent ears. Why, oh why, was I doomed to tortardation?! (slang, pejorative, adj.: retortarded)

Etymology: retort (To reply, especially to answer in a quick, caustic, or witty manner) + retard / tard (To be delayed. Latin retardāre : re- + tardāre, to delay (from tardus, slow))

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Retord

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: ree-tord

Sentence: My clever retord about his ass being listed as a major source of global warming did not come to me until long after it could be effectively delivered.

Etymology: retort, retard

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COMMENTS:

I reckon this one is better than "retortoise" because the tortoise kicked the hair's major source of a problem the American government denies exists. - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

*hare Duh! - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

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Retortoise

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: re-tor-tus

Sentence: Finally, at 2am , he thought of a retortoise

Etymology: retort, tortoise

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COMMENTS:

petaj another excellent one. I expect you may get a few comments that are retortoises - but they won't be posted for a few days :-) - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:56:00

Sublime - pinwheel, 2007-04-03: 03:58:00

retortuous! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:16:00

dang! I must arise earlier! - Alchemist, 2007-04-03: 05:41:00

fantasic - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:48:00

hareraisingly funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-04-03: 08:45:00

erasmus damn thats too good. - erasmus, 2007-04-03: 09:27:00

I thought of that too, but not until 3:30am... - wordmeister, 2007-04-03: 10:04:00

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Retorture

Created by: Erikv

Pronunciation: re tort chur

Sentence: He knew he thought of a gem with the "jerk store" line but she was gone and he was left with retorture.

Etymology: Combination of retort and torture

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Duedefence

Created by: fantomex

Pronunciation: dew-deff-enss

Sentence: It was when I came up with an obvious duedefence that I realized how stupid I am in arguments.

Etymology: due - overdue // defence - defence or defend

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Lagquip

Created by: jedijawa

Pronunciation: lag-quip

Sentence: Bill could usually be counted on to come up with a lagquip - meaning that it was always a little too late to use it.

Etymology: lag + quip

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian.
Thank you mplsbohemian! ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-04-03: 11:13:00
Thanks for using the definition! I specifically chose it because the French expression for this is notoriously difficult to succinctly translate into English. Perhaps you guys can help! Peace Clint

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 11:45:00
Ah oui, "l'ésprit de l'escalier"... Merci pour la suggestion, mplsbohemian ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-10-20: 03:48:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian. Thank you mplsbohemian. ~ James