Verboticisms

Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Arobe-Ego-nakker-ism

Sentence: At the age of "he should have known better", Richard's desperate desire to recapture his (self-deluded and fictional) youth and prowess, led him to the foolish act of joining the local gym. Once there, the sight of all the highly flexible and youthful "Gumby" girls and the muscular posturing of the male "Hunk" brigade led him to the disasterous effort of trying to compete with those a generation his Junior. The next day in the intensive care wing of the local hospital, his medical chart was filled in by the docter with the phrase "Suffered from an acute case of Arobegoknackerism during an overenergetic kneebend"

Etymology: Arobe- Arobic- (Self-inflicted pain) / Ego (Delusional self opinion) / Knacker (to bring something or oneself to the point of destruction or injury)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit - nus - slump

Sentence: Edgar had every intention of quickly regaining muscle tone and getting back on the conditioning routine but found he'd experienced a major fitnesslump and decided to forget the whole thing and return to his couch.

Etymology: Blend of fitness and slump

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COMMENTS:

That sounds like a nasty sort of lump. Should get it seen to. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:37:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wayt for sur juree

Sentence: Smedley was determined to turn himself from a bookish, skinny nerd into a bronzed, buff love god. Unfortunately, he did not prepare himself properly...his bid to get laser surgery to correct his myopia failed and he needed even stronger glasses. His day at the tanning salon was also a disaster since he looked like a buttered lobster when done. And his weight training at the gym made him tear tendons, ligaments and caused him to become a weightforsurgery case. With any luck he'd be back to his old nerdy self in 6-9 months. He should have left well enough alone!

Etymology: weight (sports equipment used in calisthenic exercises and weightlifting; a weight that is not attached to anything and is raised and lowered by use of the hands and arms) & For Surgery (a medical procedure involving an incision with instruments; performed to repair damage or arrest disease in a living body) Rhymes with Wait for Surgery...all too common and lengthy a wait these days, sadly)

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Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [pind] or [pwind]

Sentence: Determined to defeat his winter love handles, Mark finally returned to the gym only to be pwgymned by the chest press machine for five minutes, like a gnat under a toothpick, while he waited for a trainer to rescue him.

Etymology: A combination of 'gym', a building or room designed and equipped for indoor exercise, and 'pwned', a corruption of the word 'owned' denoting domination by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force. The combination sounds like 'pinned', meaning to hold something fast in a spot or position.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: alicat

Pronunciation: Ex-er-dem-eyes

Sentence: Sue hadn't been to the gym in years but decided that it was time to jump back on that horse. She went to a spinning class, gave it her all, and left feeling like a new woman. When she woke up the next morning, however, she realized that she had reached her exerdemise.

Etymology: Exercise + demise

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COMMENTS:

good one - Nosila, 2009-06-18: 20:54:00

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ten-dun-eye-tis

Sentence: Bill was right back where he started: on the couch next to a half-eaten box of meat-lover's pizza. But this time, he was unable to lift his arm to point the remote on account of his intendonitis. You see, earlier in the day he saw an infomercial about how to lose all that flab and he decided he was motivated enough to waltz into the gym and start off where he left the last time in college 15 years and 70lbs ago. He thought he begin with benching 240, the weight he used to do, but could only muster 3 reps of 80lbs. He didn't even need to use a pin to set the weights on the equipment circuit and didn't last 5 minutes on the treadmill.

Etymology: intend, to have in mind + tendonitis, inflamation of the tendons, often because of overuse

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COMMENTS:

xcellent - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:47:00

He might finish up with Adonitis! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:47:00

Good one, as they say, the path to Hell is paved with good Intendonitis... - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 19:58:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈdʒɪmˌdʒuɹ/ /JIMM-Joor/

Sentence: They told me to stay away from the free weights to avoid gymjury, but nobody warned me not to lean into the turns on the stationary bike.

Etymology: from gym + (in)jure

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COMMENTS:

you must be feeling a bit ginger after that. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:38:00

gym gyminie, gym gyminie, gym gymjury (where's purple when you have an annoying song reference) - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:27:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hurt ills

Sentence: Frankie's new fitness routine was self-designed and not well thought out. He tried to force ten years of inactivity into one afternoon at the gym to get in shape. Of course he instead caused himself a series of hurtills which required medical attention.

Etymology: Hurdles (to jump a barrier)& Hurt (injured;feel pain or be in pain ) & Ills (not in good physical or mental health)

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Created by: tyler775

Pronunciation: /fin * bah/

Sentence: I received a venba when I got tired and dropped the weight on my neck.

Etymology: *ven from French prefix for come *ba from English word 'back'

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