Verboticisms

Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [pind] or [pwind]

Sentence: Determined to defeat his winter love handles, Mark finally returned to the gym only to be pwgymned by the chest press machine for five minutes, like a gnat under a toothpick, while he waited for a trainer to rescue him.

Etymology: A combination of 'gym', a building or room designed and equipped for indoor exercise, and 'pwned', a corruption of the word 'owned' denoting domination by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force. The combination sounds like 'pinned', meaning to hold something fast in a spot or position.

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kaləstrāniks

Sentence: After years of general neglect, Jim decided to get back to the gym. Of course, as with most things, he overdid it. His callistrainics left him on his back on the sofa just like before he began.

Etymology: callisthenics (gymnastic exercises to achieve bodily fitness and grace of movement) + strain (a force tending to pull or stretch something to an extreme or damaging degree)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: were couch

Sentence: The annual january workouch proved as painful as always, the treadmill became a headmill, the bench press got a stranglehold which didn't release it's grip until he had peed on the pilates ball. The visit was followed by the annual visit to the chiropracter.

Etymology: workout, ouch

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COMMENTS:

Ouch indeed! - TJayzz, 2008-05-06: 20:56:00

Good one...do you think chiropractors own shares in gyms? mmmm - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 20:06:00

Excellent word! Simple yet versatile. - Tigger, 2008-05-07: 21:57:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PATH-let-uh-siz-uhm

Sentence: Bob, whose only regular exercise previously was a walk to and from the car, seem certain to be heading for a fitprang, if he didn't immediately cease his obsessive, new found pathleticism.

Etymology: Blend of PATHETIC: (colloquially) pitiful, hopelessly inept or inappropriate; so stupid as to be ridiculous; PATH: element in many medical words meaning illness, injury disease of the body etc., & ATHLETICISM: characterized by, or involving physical activity or exercise & ISM: fad, esp of extravagant nature.

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COMMENTS:

nice one and fitprang made me LOL - petaj, 2008-05-06: 06:37:00

Nice one OB! - didsbury, 2008-05-06: 16:27:00

Fantastic entry! - Tigger, 2008-05-07: 22:02:00

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Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ten-dun-eye-tis

Sentence: Bill was right back where he started: on the couch next to a half-eaten box of meat-lover's pizza. But this time, he was unable to lift his arm to point the remote on account of his intendonitis. You see, earlier in the day he saw an infomercial about how to lose all that flab and he decided he was motivated enough to waltz into the gym and start off where he left the last time in college 15 years and 70lbs ago. He thought he begin with benching 240, the weight he used to do, but could only muster 3 reps of 80lbs. He didn't even need to use a pin to set the weights on the equipment circuit and didn't last 5 minutes on the treadmill.

Etymology: intend, to have in mind + tendonitis, inflamation of the tendons, often because of overuse

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COMMENTS:

xcellent - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:47:00

He might finish up with Adonitis! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:47:00

Good one, as they say, the path to Hell is paved with good Intendonitis... - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 19:58:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈdʒɪmˌdʒuɹ/ /JIMM-Joor/

Sentence: They told me to stay away from the free weights to avoid gymjury, but nobody warned me not to lean into the turns on the stationary bike.

Etymology: from gym + (in)jure

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COMMENTS:

you must be feeling a bit ginger after that. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:38:00

gym gyminie, gym gyminie, gym gymjury (where's purple when you have an annoying song reference) - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:27:00

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: strech/arms/st/rong

Sentence: Sam had a difficult time explaining why one of his arms was longer than the other after returning from his fabled lunchtime workouts. His only explanation was he stretcharmstwrong.

Etymology: stretch arms wrong + Stretch Armstrong

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: by/sep/ti/see/me/a

Sentence: I thought it was only a muscle tear but it turned into the dreaded bicepticemia which ended my fifteen minutes of gym fame.

Etymology: bicep + septicemia

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COMMENTS:

nice one. ABSolutely, good word. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 06:36:00

imPECcable! - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:48:00

I think I'll muscle in on this one! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:38:00

J - what sinew with you? good word - Nosila, 2008-05-07: 01:54:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wayt for sur juree

Sentence: Smedley was determined to turn himself from a bookish, skinny nerd into a bronzed, buff love god. Unfortunately, he did not prepare himself properly...his bid to get laser surgery to correct his myopia failed and he needed even stronger glasses. His day at the tanning salon was also a disaster since he looked like a buttered lobster when done. And his weight training at the gym made him tear tendons, ligaments and caused him to become a weightforsurgery case. With any luck he'd be back to his old nerdy self in 6-9 months. He should have left well enough alone!

Etymology: weight (sports equipment used in calisthenic exercises and weightlifting; a weight that is not attached to anything and is raised and lowered by use of the hands and arms) & For Surgery (a medical procedure involving an incision with instruments; performed to repair damage or arrest disease in a living body) Rhymes with Wait for Surgery...all too common and lengthy a wait these days, sadly)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: work owch

Sentence: Bradley's quest to get trim again turned into a workouch. He dropped a weight on his toe, pulled a groin muscle doing lunges and banged his head on the bench press, after he accidentally lost his grip. His workouch will take him to the workcouch for a week of tv to recover.

Etymology: Workout (exercise regime;the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit) & Ouch (interjection used to express sudden pain)

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