Verboticisms

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: mus/cah/la/tore/chur

Sentence: Musculatorture occurs when the muscles are strained beyond endurance which often happens trying to open the heavy gym doors.

Etymology: musculature + torture

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: ree-al-ittee-ayk

Sentence: Realityache. Newsome knew it all too well. Who was he kidding? What did he think was going to happen when he finally decided to get off his butt and start working out? Moderation? Nah. With full tilt workouts from the start and after a life of increasing sedentary circumstances, Newsome knew what realityache meant with each excrutiating movement of muscle in his body.

Etymology: reality + ache

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jim-PARE-ment/

Sentence: Nathan was determined to be able to squeeze himself into his old Speedo bathing suit by summer, and he returned to the gym after a five year hiatus. But, as out-of-shape as he was, he gave himself a gympairment within five minutes of beginning his workout. He was gymbarrassed and felt like a gymposter in front of all the bodybuilders who had to help carry him out to his car. He was a total gymbecile for thinking he could still bench press his body weight like he used to.

Etymology: Gym - athletic facility equipped for sports or physical training (short for gymnasium; from Greek, gymnásion "gymnastic school") + Impairment - damage that results in a reduction of strength or quality (from Middle English, empeiren "to make worse")

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COMMENTS:

gympressive...most gympressive...but you are not a gymjedi yet - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:24:00

It's gympossible not to love it! There are so many great words today, too bad we can only pick 2! Makes one feel gympotent! - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 20:02:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hurt ills

Sentence: Frankie's new fitness routine was self-designed and not well thought out. He tried to force ten years of inactivity into one afternoon at the gym to get in shape. Of course he instead caused himself a series of hurtills which required medical attention.

Etymology: Hurdles (to jump a barrier)& Hurt (injured;feel pain or be in pain ) & Ills (not in good physical or mental health)

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: press-frak-chur

Sentence: Dan sustained a pressfracture when he tried to lift more weights than he should for a guy his age and shape. Adding insult to injury, he would have to endure the ribbing of the guys at the office and the constant "I told you so..." from his wife.

Etymology: press: a weight in weightlifting, to apply force or pressure + fracture: bone break or rupture in the cartilage -- stress fracture: fracture caused by undue stress or pressure on a bone

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: natch hurt o path ee

Sentence: Arnold's naturopathy exercises turned into nathurtopathy exercises when he strained himself on his dumbells...apparently they were aptly named.

Etymology: Naturopathy (a method of treating disease using food and exercise and heat to assist the natural healing process) & Hurt (sore, in pain)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kaləstrāniks

Sentence: After years of general neglect, Jim decided to get back to the gym. Of course, as with most things, he overdid it. His callistrainics left him on his back on the sofa just like before he began.

Etymology: callisthenics (gymnastic exercises to achieve bodily fitness and grace of movement) + strain (a force tending to pull or stretch something to an extreme or damaging degree)

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: jĭm-mām'ē-əm

Sentence: He figued it was just a HALF-marathon, surely it would be no big deal. After all, before he'd laid off running-what was it, three and a nalf years now?-he'd had quite a few fun runs and even that one ten-K under his belt. Predictably, however, the event resulted in extensive gymaimium, from severe shin splints to bleeding, chafed nipples.

Etymology: Gym, var. of Jim, after workout guru Jum Belushi; maimi, var. of Mamie, after famous Jack LaLane mistress, Mamie Eisenhower; um, speech filler related to 'uh.'

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COMMENTS:

Galway's workouch goes well with your gymaimium. - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:32:00

good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:44:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ek/ses/ser/size

Sentence: In spring to rid of the winter lard, people tend to excessercise themselves into sore muscles, joints and injuries.

Etymology: excess + exercise

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COMMENTS:

Good one. - Mustang, 2009-06-19: 03:03:00

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