Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To call a phone "help line" and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Presstress
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: press stress
Sentence: Murray's patience was running out...he was feeling the presstress of waiting on the phone for over 10 minutes now, after having been forced to press many choices to get to his final destination and then they put him on hold. What happened to when you phoned somewhere and got a live human to answer your questions? What made the powers that be decide to substitute pretend humans for real ones. He knew that lady's voice on the phone better than his own mother's! His aggravation grew and he presstressed some more, only to still end up on that message,"Your call is important to us, we value your business, please wait on the line for the next available operator". Sheesh, how hard was it to get a pizza anyway? And then he realized his error...in his presstress, he had not called Tony's 30 Minute Pizza, but had in error pushed another number. Good thing he was not dying or in trouble, just hungry, because he had accidentally pushed 911 instead!
Etymology: press (the act of pressing; the exertion of pressure or the state of urgently demanding notice or attention) & stress (a state of mental or emotional strain or suspense; or test the limits of)
Vexmessaging
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: vex mess ajing
Sentence: Vexmessaging is described as what used to be a 2 minute inquiry call to a company, greeted by a pleasant, real live person, which has been replaced with a very long battle with an automatronic simulated human voice which does not give you enough options to get an answer. Vexmessaging gives companies the statistics that say their complaints this year are fewer. It is only because no one can get through to anyone to complain!!! Your call is important to us... indeed!
Etymology: Vex (to irritate, annoy,disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress;cause annoyance in;especially by minor irritations or be a mystery or bewildering to) & Messaging (sending a message or receiving one)& rhymes with Text Messaging (how everyone under 30 communicates in abbreviated codes, by cell phone/blackberry or other computerized device...even if they are in the same room as those with whom they communicating!)
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COMMENTS:
Covers it quite nicely. Great word! - Mustang, 2009-05-20: 04:58:00
so true - Jabberwocky, 2009-05-22: 13:15:00
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Eternadial
Created by: rebelvin
Pronunciation: eterna-dail
Sentence: All I could reach was their eternadial, which kept me busy for nearly half an hour before I gave up before reaching a real person.
Etymology: eternal+dial
Autocommunifrustratilooplooploop
Created by: CanadianAndyCapp
Pronunciation: Or-tow-kom-U-ni-fruss-tray-tee-loop-loop-loop (with the final three loops said in an increasingly aggitated, high, strangulated manner)
Sentence: (Taken from a speech by General Ludd)...."...Tecno-phobes and Luddites unite! you have only the shackles of your automated communications and information data retrieval systems to lose. We have been tricked into believing that these "new and improved" technologies were developed to improve our lives. Not So! they are the subvertive systems by which we are brainwashed into surrendering our individual creative and social capabilities to the mind-numbing and straitjacket methods of the computerised system we are trying to use. For proof we need look no further than the omnipresent office automatic phone systems and their cunningly devised autocommunifrustratilooplooploop tortures. Arise, rebels of the future and reclaim your sanity and souls!!!!..." This message is recorded for public information. Please press one to repeat this message, Two for information on how to...........looplooploop
Etymology: Auto - Automatic (Constantly breaking down) / Communi - Communication (totally without intelligent substance) / Frustrati - Frustration (The Human condition) / Looplooploop (Go back to the beginning and start again-again-again)
Agendizzement
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: a/jen/deez/mant
Sentence: The agendizzement was so convoluted and confusing that he soon developed a case of mennui and gave up ordering pizza.
Etymology: agenda + dizzy + aggrandizement (cause to appear greater than is the case)
Telrettes
Created by: griffiegrrl
Pronunciation: Tell-retts
Sentence: John was experiencing Tellrettes when he was on an automated help-line the other day, and required a tranquilizer to calm him down.
Etymology: Turrets Syndrome (Spelling tweaked), Telephone
Presstwosterloop
Created by: diyan627
Pronunciation: press two ster loop
Sentence: Tina spent an hour and forty-five minutes on the most insane, frustrating presstwosterloop scam her cell phone company is putting customers through. After explaining her situation to 7 representatives, they still owed her $350 for the "promotional phone" she got 4 months ago. The presstwosterloop didn't stop her ... She finally hung up and drove down to the store where she raised a ruckus until the manager got her problem taken care of. Or so he said.
Etymology: Press two (ah, the options!) + ster (one that is associated with, participates, does) + loop (circular action)
Noperator
Created by: shoeshineboy
Pronunciation: NO-puh-ray-terr
Sentence:
Etymology: nope + operator
Vexchange
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: veks chaynj
Sentence: When Rory got the usual runaround on the voice-activated system of his telephone provider, he went crazy pushing numbers, trying to connect to the complaint department. He figured that this was their main vexchange and it took him 20 minutes of phone aggro before he was finally cut off. It is just as well that he did not reach a real human voice, as he would then have discovered that the agent worked half a world away and spoke English he had just learned in the past 6 months!Ma Bell was now Ma Dumbbell in his books.
Etymology: Vex (cause annoyance in; disturb, especially by minor irritations)& Exchange (a workplace that serves as a telecommunications facility where lines from telephones can be connected together to permit communication)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Jamagra - 2008-04-14: 07:25:00
I miss silveryaspen.
Mustang - 2008-04-15: 03:35:00
Where did silveryaspen go?
Silveryaspen has retired from active duty. But I am sure she is still creating Verboticisms in her head and saying wonderful things about all the Verbotomy Writers! ~ James
Mustang - 2008-04-16: 06:26:00
She is missed. She did indeed say some very nice things about Verbotomizers.
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
readerwriter - 2009-05-20: 07:52:00
How long is summer vacation? Just trying to make plans...
We work flex hours, so it is variable. I will send out an announcement when we start anew. ~ James