Verboticism: Lovelite
DEFINITION: n. A valentine gift which does not cause weight gain. v. To give a non-fattening gift as a symbol of love, which should not be interpreted -- under any circumstances -- as a comment on the recipient's weight.
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Lovelite
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Choconots
Created by: Nuwanda
Pronunciation: chalk-o-nots
Sentence: After hearing me lament about the Christmas weight gain and the impending doom of swimsuit season on the horizon, my husband really thought he was being considerate when he found a healthy alternative to Valentine's Day candy. However, he learned that the choconots were just the first of many denied pleasures of that holiday.
Etymology: The word "chocolates" altered to incorporate "not"
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COMMENTS:
Super funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:50:00
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Heartlyanycalories
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: hart/lee/any/cal/or/ees
Sentence: Heartlyanycalories is the newest sensation to hit the shelves this Valentines day. Each box of these chocolate peanut butter hearts is generously laced with salmonella that will ensure not only that you don't gain an ounce but guarantees that you'll lose plenty.
Etymology: heart + hardly any calories
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COMMENTS:
Great - TJayzz, 2009-02-09: 07:52:00
Sizzling sentence, better than the news has done! Your verbotomy is a confection of perfection! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:42:00
good play on words...liked it. - mweinmann, 2009-02-10: 09:36:00
That's so funny. - kateinkorea, 2009-02-12: 21:25:00
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Joulery
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: jool-er-ee
Sentence: As Carmella stared at the softly gleaming string of pearls in front of her, she knew she had invented the perfect Valentine's gift. She would apply for the patent today! The hard, round vitamin-packed, sugar-free morsels she had meticulously drilled holes in would be called "joulery." Her company would be called Aunty's Joules because, of course, she was against anyone gaining weight from eating her creation. She knew she had a winner in these tough economic times. Dinner and a gift, all in one!
Etymology: A play on JOULE, meaning the energy created by caloric intake.
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COMMENTS:
When Carmella discovered her pearls weren't real, was she shocked? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:47:00
Yes, especially as they were cast before swine! - readerwriter, 2009-02-09: 15:14:00
LOL - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:48:00
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Xerofatgy
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: Xe/ro/fat/gy
Sentence: A xerofatgy Valentine gift is perfect for that Jenny Craig bound partner.
Etymology: XEROFATGY - from XEROPHAGY (a fast observed among the primitive Christians) + FAT
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COMMENTS:
Thanks for introducing me to another new word. Apt and unique! Super originality. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:44:00
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Karatcake
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kar at kayke
Sentence: Eddie always gave Shirley a karatcake for Valentine's day. It was a no-cal styrofoam corn cake with a piece of gold jewellery lying on it. But the price of gold kept going up, so next year he would probably get her a caratcake instead... you know the marriage proposal type of diamond ring.
Etymology: Karat (the weight of gold) & Cake (small flat mass of chopped food)
Romancingthebones
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Ro-w-man-sing-the-bowns
Sentence: Noticing his wife had put on a few extra pounds over Christmas, Steve decided on a romancingthebones gift for Valentines Day. Instead of the usual large box of chocolates, he bought her a pair of trainers. He did also buy a huge bunch of flowers to bring out, just in case she tried to hit him with the footwear.
Etymology: Romance(Court the favour of) SEE ALSO Romancing the Stone(1984 Romantic Comedy starring Michael Douglas
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COMMENTS:
terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-09: 08:43:00
Darling! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:37:00
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Yomammasoghurt
Created by: GlobalGallery
Pronunciation: yo-mumma-sow-gurt
Sentence: Brandon had made a special effort cooking for his wife Kylie for their 10th wedding anniversary. A seafood salad and some fine wine followed by fresh fruit and yomammasoghurt. "What's this?" asked Kylie. "Urm, the kids ate all the double choc-fudge ripple icecream" he sheepishly replied.
Etymology: 1. A play on the Yo' Mamma so fat jokes. eg 'Yo' Mamma so fat she aint got a waistline, she got an equator'. 'Yo' Mamma so fat they gotta take her licence picture with a satellite'. 2. yoghurt - a food product made from curdled milk.
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COMMENTS:
Never heard any Yo' Mamma jokes before, so thanks for for something new. Yoghurt is a word I'll be using as I don't like it. Well-crafted, punsome, funsome! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:35:00
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Carborater
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: CAR-bo-rayt-ehr
Sentence: Much to the chagrin of his wife Sadie, Carmichael was overly concerned about her health and her weight and he was a meticulous carborater and only upon careful examination of the listing of ingredients would he buy the least fattening foods, including Valentines day candy offerings.
Etymology: Blend of 'carbo' or carbohydrate and 'rater'....one who rates or assesses. A play on the word 'carburetor'..a device that meters 'fuel' to an engine.
Allyouneedislove
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: all you need is love
Sentence: Allyouneedislove love, love is all you need...not chocolate.
Etymology: From a famous song by the late John Lennon.
Goodiva
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: gooddahyva
Sentence: Will's ample-figured girlfriend loves her chocolate. Valentine's Day puts him in a quandary. Does he support her desire to be healthier or her vices? He may have found a way to do both as long as she doesn't notice the slight labeling change on the big box of sugar-free knockoff brand of Goodiva chocolates.
Etymology: good (of high quality) + Godiva (brand of high-end chocolate)
