Verboticism: Jonesists

'The victim of an extremely vicious browbeating'

DEFINITION: n. Annoying neighbors who spend endless hours mowing their lawns, painting their fences, washing their cars, and browbeating you because you have a life. v. To express disapproval for someone's lifestyle.

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Jonesists

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Hoodhogs

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: hood-hawgz

Sentence: Patience had endured enough. She was exhausted from the nightly raids by her nebby neighbors, Neil and Nosy Parker. They pruned, they plowed, they picked. What deadheads! So what if her dog peed all over her lawn--it was her lawn, wasn't it? And the world needed more nitrogen! Last night was the last straw. Patience had been awakened by the sound of the duo flooding her yard with water. She stood at her window and watched in astonishment. Obviously these hoodhogs were trying to dilute the urine. Then they began to root around, scraping up the dead grass, quietly bickering over whether it should be to a depth of one-quarter or one-half inch. In the morning she had found a note on her back door saying, "Now you may sow replacement grass."

Etymology: From HOOD, slang/contraction for neighborhood + HOGS, meaning greedy or selfish, also a play on pig, derogatory for police

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COMMENTS:

No doubt distant cousins of hedgeghogs? - Mustang, 2009-03-17: 22:57:00

All that grass and not a sharp blade in sight when you need it! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:29:00

metrohumanx Hahahaha! Good word! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-18: 04:49:00

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Lifenvy

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: li-fen-vie

Sentence: Cam and Sylvia took their lifenviousness too far when they parked their truck on Trish's front lawn. She's never home to take care of her property anyway and she won't even notice it there.

Etymology: life + envy

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Preenieacks

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Preen-e-acks

Sentence: The Jones neighbors that lived next to Sliezanna were total "preenieacks" as they tirelessly worked hard to manicure their lawns and detailed their cars every single weekend. Sliezanna she was a "preenieack" about her appearance and she was living life to it's fullest. Yet,the Jones's next door gave her a tongue lashing about keeping her yard as nice as theirs in order to keep up the curb appeal and tax value in the neighborhood. The next thing they knew,poor little Sliezanna fainted over them telling her just how perfect she needed to be. Sliezanna recovered from her fainting and hired a lawn service and mobile car wash company to keep up appearances so the nagging neighbors would mind their own business. All is well in the neighborhood...except for that nagging old Mrs. Jones next door that cuts her eyes every time she sees Sliezanna dressed to the 9's and giggling as she waves goodbye to Mrs. Jones.

Etymology: Preen;grooming. ieacks;(slang); more than one person having a mania about their own preening,cleaning and grooming habits whether personal or objects that need grooming.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Sliezanna! Good one! Like it! Like IT! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-17: 02:57:00

good one - galwaywegian, 2009-03-17: 05:54:00

In both your sentence and your word ... great humor! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 14:35:00

Preenieactual description of amny neighbors people on this site have met! ANd I love the name Sliezanna, too! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:18:00

Thank you everyone :) I love this site and the challenges to use my creative thinking! Hugs to you all!!! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-18: 03:14:00

Creative and to the point! Thanks! - jasjamson, 2009-05-08: 02:19:00

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Naybores

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: nay bohrs

Sentence: It was difficult to discern whether the high pitched drone coming from the other side of the fence was a garden strimmer or one of the naybores complaining about the ingress of weeds from her wildflower garden.

Etymology: neighbour nay, bore

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COMMENTS:

I like it....goes good with naboobs. Naboob naybores.... - Mustang, 2009-03-17: 21:14:00

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Annoighbors

Created by: WeimCentral

Pronunciation: a-noi-burs

Sentence: Betty was surrounded by annoighbors who judged her severely for her lack of Master Gardener status. Yes, she buys marked down plants at Home Depot but it is commensurate with their likelihood of viability in her yard.

Etymology: Annoy (generally vexing) + Neighbors (those who either abut your property or are just butts in your close proximity)

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Honebodies

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hone bod ees

Sentence: Marcia was always criticized by her neighbours, because she never stayed home and spent hours working on her house. The Kranks, the honebodies from next door, were the first suspects when Marcia was found dead on her grass. She should have taken fencing lessons to get lawn order.

Etymology: Hone (to sharpen, improve,make perfect or complete) & WordPlay on Homebodies (people who seldom leave home)

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Moanses

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: /mohn-siz/

Sentence: Charlotte pulled out of the garage to find the Christmas lights torn down to the point that they were dragging through her hair. She clawed at the string of bulbs as she nearly ran the convertible into the mailbox. Looks like the Moanses were trying to give her another hint.

Etymology: Play on words of "Joneses", as in "keeping up with the" and moan, to low with dismay or pain

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COMMENTS:

Super funny! Truly a great word for complaining neighbors. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 14:08:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-17: 19:38:00

Sounds like our neighbour, Mona Lott! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:32:00

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Neighbores

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: nay borz

Sentence: Alice lived in an average urban housing tract of single family dwellings. She lived next door to that one couple on every block who spends every spare second out there tending their yard. These neighbores used scissors to eradicate every long single blade of grass. Their yard looked unnatural in its manicured state and even the bugs avoided it. Too bad they treated Alice and her country garden home with such disdain. They thought she was a hoe...

Etymology: Neighbors (persons who live near each other) & Bores (a person who evokes boredom;make a hole with a pointed power or hand tool)

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Abuttinski

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ay but in skee

Sentence: In our sleepy suburban town, we had an abuttinski. She was Old Lady Burns, the bitter divorcee who lived next door to us and found fault with everything people did for enjoyment. She was the Neighbourhood Witch, the one who you could never please. If we didn't mow the lawn when she felt it needed it, she called the Noxious Weed Dept. If we did start up the mower to tackle the lawn, she called the Noise Abatement Dept. If our dog was out in our fenced off back yard, she called the Humane Society. We came this close to having to toilet train Sparky on the potty inside. If we even started up the barbecue, we would have to ensure we had enough food for the whole fire crew, as she would call them the minute we opened the lid. If we cooked something spicy, like curry, the HazMat Team was forced on the scene. The police practically lived on our street because she called them for everything from suspicious persons going door to door (like the paper boy and mailman) to recording license plates of vehicles not know to dwell on our street (like all these enforcement officers' vehicles from all the various city departments)and for attempted break-ins on her property (the gas meter reader,census-takers, the Avon lady). Reasoning, bribes,acts of kindness and inclusion,threats and logical persuasion all failed to change her behaviors. She was always in the right and she had her lawyer on speed-dial to launch suit over anyone who stood up to her underhanded, second-party bullying. She would hide in her house and have every civil servant at her beck and call to do her dirty work. Being self-righteous and thinking herself an upstanding and virtuous Christian, she did speak to every religion peddlar who came to her door. Many thought it poetic justice that the horrid smell coming from her home one day was due to the fact that one of these zealots had taken exception to her smug beliefs and bashed in her cranium several weeks before and helped himself to her valuables. The police, while appearing professional, were secretly glad she no longer controlled their work duties, so they could finally concentrate on real crimes; the Fire Dept. was relieved to have an opportunity to actually fight real fires elsewhere. The moral: if you are not nice to people, there will be no one around to close your lids when your time comes!

Etymology: Abut (lie adjacent to another or share a boundary) & Buttinski(a meddler who tends to butt in)

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COMMENTS:

Good one Nosila! :)You are a great writer! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-17: 01:37:00

metrohumanx I was just kidding about the brevity of "hydroflobia"....This is an excellent parable and one helluva mico-novel! I hope you're in charge of refreshments at the upcoming First Annual International Verbotomixer and Wordswap Extravaganza! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-17: 03:16:00

Amdire the way you captured that butt mentality! Great etymology. Terrific word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 13:54:00

Cheers, all...sadly my sister and her family had to move far away from us to escape such a neighbour...coming home was the most stressful and scary part of their day, because she spent long hours plotting fresh Hell for them. This creature outlived every elected official we had and there is finally a cease and desist response in her flagged file to warn emergency services not to respond to her calls, as she became a permanent nuisance. Of course, charging her $250 for every wasted call went a long way to curbing her behavior! It is sad that someone has nothing better to do but terrorize others...personally I think she'd give the Guantanamo guys a run for their money! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:40:00

My heart goes out to you and your sister and your families. I am so thankful that I have exceptionally good neighbors! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-18: 12:56:00

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Naboobs

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: NAY-bubes

Sentence: Loretta thought of her neighbors as naboobs, people of some wealth and circumstance who who had nothing better to do than improve their properties and their lives while she sunbathed, partied and did her best to just look pretty.

Etymology: Use of 'boob' (dufus, crude person) Play on the word 'nabob' (A person of wealth and prominence)

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