Verboticism: Allyouneedislove

'I knew you didn't want anything fattening...'

DEFINITION: n. A valentine gift which does not cause weight gain. v. To give a non-fattening gift as a symbol of love, which should not be interpreted -- under any circumstances -- as a comment on the recipient's weight.

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Allyouneedislove

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Yomammasoghurt

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: yo-mumma-sow-gurt

Sentence: Brandon had made a special effort cooking for his wife Kylie for their 10th wedding anniversary. A seafood salad and some fine wine followed by fresh fruit and yomammasoghurt. "What's this?" asked Kylie. "Urm, the kids ate all the double choc-fudge ripple icecream" he sheepishly replied.

Etymology: 1. A play on the Yo' Mamma so fat jokes. eg 'Yo' Mamma so fat she aint got a waistline, she got an equator'. 'Yo' Mamma so fat they gotta take her licence picture with a satellite'. 2. yoghurt - a food product made from curdled milk.

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COMMENTS:

Never heard any Yo' Mamma jokes before, so thanks for for something new. Yoghurt is a word I'll be using as I don't like it. Well-crafted, punsome, funsome! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:35:00

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Joulery

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: jool-er-ee

Sentence: As Carmella stared at the softly gleaming string of pearls in front of her, she knew she had invented the perfect Valentine's gift. She would apply for the patent today! The hard, round vitamin-packed, sugar-free morsels she had meticulously drilled holes in would be called "joulery." Her company would be called Aunty's Joules because, of course, she was against anyone gaining weight from eating her creation. She knew she had a winner in these tough economic times. Dinner and a gift, all in one!

Etymology: A play on JOULE, meaning the energy created by caloric intake.

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COMMENTS:

When Carmella discovered her pearls weren't real, was she shocked? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:47:00

Yes, especially as they were cast before swine! - readerwriter, 2009-02-09: 15:14:00

LOL - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:48:00

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Carborater

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: CAR-bo-rayt-ehr

Sentence: Much to the chagrin of his wife Sadie, Carmichael was overly concerned about her health and her weight and he was a meticulous carborater and only upon careful examination of the listing of ingredients would he buy the least fattening foods, including Valentines day candy offerings.

Etymology: Blend of 'carbo' or carbohydrate and 'rater'....one who rates or assesses. A play on the word 'carburetor'..a device that meters 'fuel' to an engine.

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Heartlyanycalories

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: hart/lee/any/cal/or/ees

Sentence: Heartlyanycalories is the newest sensation to hit the shelves this Valentines day. Each box of these chocolate peanut butter hearts is generously laced with salmonella that will ensure not only that you don't gain an ounce but guarantees that you'll lose plenty.

Etymology: heart + hardly any calories

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COMMENTS:

Great - TJayzz, 2009-02-09: 07:52:00

Sizzling sentence, better than the news has done! Your verbotomy is a confection of perfection! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:42:00

good play on words...liked it. - mweinmann, 2009-02-10: 09:36:00

That's so funny. - kateinkorea, 2009-02-12: 21:25:00

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Covertcarbcurber

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: CO vert CARB cur bur

Sentence: I know my boyfriend is worried about me getting fat like the other women in my family, so he was kind of sneaky about how he gave me my present. That covertcarbcurber gave me chocolates but he made sure I opened them around my mother and sisters...and they ate most of them.

Etymology: COVERT:to do something and try to go unnoticed or stay hidden CARB: short for carbohydrate CURBER: a person who curbs, or stops or limits an activity or thing

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Allyouneedislove

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: all you need is love

Sentence: Allyouneedislove love, love is all you need...not chocolate.

Etymology: From a famous song by the late John Lennon.

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Goodiva

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: gooddahyva

Sentence: Will's ample-figured girlfriend loves her chocolate. Valentine's Day puts him in a quandary. Does he support her desire to be healthier or her vices? He may have found a way to do both as long as she doesn't notice the slight labeling change on the big box of sugar-free knockoff brand of Goodiva chocolates.

Etymology: good (of high quality) + Godiva (brand of high-end chocolate)

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Unfattering

Created by: catalina

Pronunciation: UN-FAT-TER-ING

Sentence: I knew that you would be flattered by the unfattering gift I gave you for valentines day.

Etymology: Flattering

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Carborater

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: CAR-bo-rayt-ehr

Sentence: Much to the chagrin of his wife Lucy, Clarence was overly concerned about her health and her weight and he was a meticulous carborater and only upon careful examination of the listing of ingredients would he buy the least fattening foods, including Valentines day candy offerings.

Etymology: Blend of 'carbo' or (carbohydrate) and 'rater' (one who rates or assesses) A play on the word 'carburetor' (a device that meters 'fuel' to an engine)

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Karatcake

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kar at kayke

Sentence: Eddie always gave Shirley a karatcake for Valentine's day. It was a no-cal styrofoam corn cake with a piece of gold jewellery lying on it. But the price of gold kept going up, so next year he would probably get her a caratcake instead... you know the marriage proposal type of diamond ring.

Etymology: Karat (the weight of gold) & Cake (small flat mass of chopped food)

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