Verboticism: Allyouneedislove
DEFINITION: n. A valentine gift which does not cause weight gain. v. To give a non-fattening gift as a symbol of love, which should not be interpreted -- under any circumstances -- as a comment on the recipient's weight.
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Joulery
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: jool-er-ee
Sentence: As Carmella stared at the softly gleaming string of pearls in front of her, she knew she had invented the perfect Valentine's gift. She would apply for the patent today! The hard, round vitamin-packed, sugar-free morsels she had meticulously drilled holes in would be called "joulery." Her company would be called Aunty's Joules because, of course, she was against anyone gaining weight from eating her creation. She knew she had a winner in these tough economic times. Dinner and a gift, all in one!
Etymology: A play on JOULE, meaning the energy created by caloric intake.
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COMMENTS:
When Carmella discovered her pearls weren't real, was she shocked? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:47:00
Yes, especially as they were cast before swine! - readerwriter, 2009-02-09: 15:14:00
LOL - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:48:00
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Karatcake
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kar at kayke
Sentence: Eddie always gave Shirley a karatcake for Valentine's day. It was a no-cal styrofoam corn cake with a piece of gold jewellery lying on it. But the price of gold kept going up, so next year he would probably get her a caratcake instead... you know the marriage proposal type of diamond ring.
Etymology: Karat (the weight of gold) & Cake (small flat mass of chopped food)
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Smattening
Created by: abrakadeborah
Pronunciation: sma-ten-ing
Sentence: Steven Stoopifidis, made sure to give a smattening Valentines heart to his sweetie, Miss Bootie Badonkazonker.
Etymology: Smack - To strike or slap smartly, with or as if with the open hand. Fattening - To make plump or fat.
Romanthin
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: row mann thin
Sentence: his romanthin gesture followed her non-appreciation of his romanthick gestures of previous years
Etymology: romantic, thin
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COMMENTS:
very funny - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-09: 13:26:00
Together ... thru thick and thin - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:52:00
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Choconots
Created by: Nuwanda
Pronunciation: chalk-o-nots
Sentence: After hearing me lament about the Christmas weight gain and the impending doom of swimsuit season on the horizon, my husband really thought he was being considerate when he found a healthy alternative to Valentine's Day candy. However, he learned that the choconots were just the first of many denied pleasures of that holiday.
Etymology: The word "chocolates" altered to incorporate "not"
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COMMENTS:
Super funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:50:00
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Romancingthebones
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Ro-w-man-sing-the-bowns
Sentence: Noticing his wife had put on a few extra pounds over Christmas, Steve decided on a romancingthebones gift for Valentines Day. Instead of the usual large box of chocolates, he bought her a pair of trainers. He did also buy a huge bunch of flowers to bring out, just in case she tried to hit him with the footwear.
Etymology: Romance(Court the favour of) SEE ALSO Romancing the Stone(1984 Romantic Comedy starring Michael Douglas
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COMMENTS:
terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-09: 08:43:00
Darling! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:37:00
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Heartlyanycalories
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: hart/lee/any/cal/or/ees
Sentence: Heartlyanycalories is the newest sensation to hit the shelves this Valentines day. Each box of these chocolate peanut butter hearts is generously laced with salmonella that will ensure not only that you don't gain an ounce but guarantees that you'll lose plenty.
Etymology: heart + hardly any calories
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COMMENTS:
Great - TJayzz, 2009-02-09: 07:52:00
Sizzling sentence, better than the news has done! Your verbotomy is a confection of perfection! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:42:00
good play on words...liked it. - mweinmann, 2009-02-10: 09:36:00
That's so funny. - kateinkorea, 2009-02-12: 21:25:00
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Supernocalfragilegoisshegonnakillus
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: soōpər nōkal frajəl ēgō iz shē gônə kil us
Sentence: John knew he was taking a big risk giving Mary ultra-low-calorie chocolates for Valentine's Day. He wondered if it was a supernocalfragilegoisshegonnakillus move. With beach season looming, she was really focused on her figure but was he supposed to notice? He could be changing his last name to Doe (Doh!)
Etymology: derivative of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious from the musical Mary Poppins
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COMMENTS:
Fun mouthful! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:38:00
Great, but I wouldn't like to attempt to say it after a few drinks! - TJayzz, 2009-02-09: 13:44:00
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Unfattering
Created by: catalina
Pronunciation: UN-FAT-TER-ING
Sentence: I knew that you would be flattered by the unfattering gift I gave you for valentines day.
Etymology: Flattering
Covertcarbcurber
Created by: kateinkorea
Pronunciation: CO vert CARB cur bur
Sentence: I know my boyfriend is worried about me getting fat like the other women in my family, so he was kind of sneaky about how he gave me my present. That covertcarbcurber gave me chocolates but he made sure I opened them around my mother and sisters...and they ate most of them.
Etymology: COVERT:to do something and try to go unnoticed or stay hidden CARB: short for carbohydrate CURBER: a person who curbs, or stops or limits an activity or thing
