Verboticisms

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: sir-oh-grate

Sentence: I hesistated to let my brother watch my child as he proved his status as a surrohgreat last time when he taught her a score of filthy limericks.

Etymology: surrogate + oh great!

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COMMENTS:

Took me a moment to parse this one, but it made me chuckle when it clicked. - ErWenn, 2008-02-26: 10:12:00

it sort of reminds me of sewer grate which would be a grate place for filthy limericks - Jabberwocky, 2008-02-26: 13:24:00

Wouldn't you like to gate the mouths on the sirs who are surrohgreats! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:07:00

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Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Mal-a-sit-ter-ism

Sentence: Despite all precautions and checking, one cannot totally avoid the possibility that a child will pick up a malasitterism from the babysitter.

Etymology: Mal- Bad / Sitter- Part-time caregiver / ism- habit or manner

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COMMENTS:

Especially if the baby sitter is Mrs. Malaprop! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:59:00

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Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /zo-o-tard/ (note: each of the “o”s is a distinct sound as in “zoology,” for example; /zu-tard/ is INcorrect)

Sentence: Q. “Can you believe it?! We left our pet beagle with my idiot brother-in-law for a mere fortnight and that zootard taught it how to leg-hump anyone who sits in my favourite recliner!” A. “What’s so strange about that? I thought all dogs leg-hump?” Q. “Male dogs do. But Betsy’s a bitch!”

Etymology: zoo – fr. Greek for “animal” -tard – a slang root derived from the word “retard”

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: kon/trer/giv/er

Sentence: "Every time I'm left with that @%&dam !@#$%&* contrargiver brother of yours, I come back with !@#$%&* awful language like this," lamented Fudgy, my beloved parakeet.

Etymology: contrary + caregiver

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COMMENTS:

Great etymology! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:28:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: un-cool-tom-foo-la-ree

Sentence: what uncooltomfoolery is this? I leave you in your uncle's care for just 1 day and he has set about untraining the good habits we instilled in you. Now scrub off that ridiculous tattoo and put the bottle back in the wine rack.

Etymology: uncool (not approved) + uncle (someone often entrusted to care for nieces and nephews) + tomfoolery (nonsense) + uncle tom (yes i have one of those)

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: harm you kay shun

Sentence: When Harry met Sally, she was a nice lady, polite, well-mannered, and a delight to see. By example, Harry taught her to pick her nose and scratch her bottom, and to shovel all the food on her plate, to make sure no one else got some. Now, Harry is sorry and sad to tell, his harmucations have made Sally as irritating as ... ahem ... well ... himself!

Etymology: Harm You, Educations - teaching people bad habits is giving them harmucations.

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: petz - tuh - didj - ih - tay -shun

Sentence: While keeping his brother in law Morton's favorite hunting dog while Morton was on vacation, Myron resorted to some underhanded petstidigitation to teach the old dog a couple new and socially unacceptable tricks.

Etymology: blend of pet and prestidigitation (sleight of hand or ('trick')

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COMMENTS:

Petty good! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:58:00

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Created by: freiflug

Pronunciation: /kəˈreskɒnvəˈluːted/

Sentence: "After I have received my turtle Frances back from my brother-in-law, all he does is nibbling the telephone cable. Frances has totally been caressconvoluted."

Etymology: caress: to touch or kiss lovingly; to fondle convulsion: an intense, paroxysmal, involuntary muscular contraction; an uncontrolled fit, as of laughter; a paroxysm Convulsion hereby alters/modifies the meaning of "caress", concluding in a somewhat spoiled interpretation of caressing sth. or so.

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Created by: parm289

Pronunciation: kor-rup-pit

Sentence: Don't let Uncle Mikey stay home alone - he'll corrupet the parrot again! Our cousin corrupetted the parrot again!

Etymology: corrupt + pet

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: pat-rih-bull-dree

Sentence: Dear Mr. Silverstein, I'm writing to you today concerning the behavior of your son, Andrew Dice, in my morning kindergarten class. He has become somewhat of a distraction to the class, and I have to question whether or not he is being exposed to the proper developmental tools at home. His sense of humor is overly mature for a class of this level, and I don't think it would be inaccurate to state that he has the vocabulary of a longshoreman. When asked to share his favorite nursery rhyme in class the other day, he recited a profane perversion of "Jack and Jill". He laughs alound whenever someone mentions playing with balls at recess, or I chastise a member of the class for eating paste. I caught a member of the class a week ago giving herself a haircut with the safety shears, and Andrew suggested that she use them for a "Brazillian". He routinely pulls the covers off of female members of the class during nap time, throws a handful of change at them, and tells them "you gotta get outta here". Whether patribaldry is to blame or some other member of your family has instilled these poor behaviors, this must be corrected, or we will have no other option but to remove your child from our school. Sincerely, Mrs. Abagail Trenton, Sunny Heights Grade School

Etymology: patri - of the father, ribaldry - obscene or improper behavior

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COMMENTS:

Nice word and story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 16:13:00

Cringed over the sentence. Great word! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:18:00

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