Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: at ten duns

Sentence: Jason was typical of the attendunts a retail store can afford, someone who spent his whole shift texting and phoning friends. Jason made people sorry they stopped by. When the CEO came on a Royal Visit, the whole entourage got busy and decorated the store. Except Jason, who told his immediate supervisor (who was 17) that he had to catch up on his filing. I smell an audit coming. Jason is now filing again...his unemployment papers.

Etymology: Attendant (cashier or clerk) & Dunts (To strike; give a blow to; knock) &dunce (stupid person)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: cash-sheer-gall

Sentence: Brandon often displayed casheergall while working the counter at the convenience store and would continue on with personal chores while ignoring waiting customers.

Etymology: blend of cashier, sheer, and gall

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COMMENTS:

They must go to a special school... - Nosila, 2009-06-25: 11:19:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kash neer

Sentence: Joel is a customer service nightmare. He thinks customers are just there to annoy him and interrupt his more interesting pursuits. Joel is a cashneer. He neither knows nor cares why they are paying him. See Joel fail another secret shopper audit. Sorry, Joel, but you should have realized that the poor customer you detest gives your boss the money to pay you. Being paid is something you no longer have to worry about!

Etymology: cashier(a person responsible for receiving payments for goods and services (as in a shop or restaurant) & Sneer (a facial expression of contempt or scorn; the upper lip curls; a contemptuous or scornful remark;smile contemptuously)

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TILL-shy

Sentence: Why don't you shop on-line, and stop rudely interrupting my day, was the routine retort to customers from the tillshy, check-out "chick".

Etymology: Combination of TILL: drawer for money in cash-register etc., & SHY: as in workshy - to be afraid of.

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: mal-conn-ten-dant

Sentence: I am in a hurry but the staff in this shop are all such malcontendants there is no one who will serve me.

Etymology: Combination of malcontent and attendant. First used by Mark Twain to describe a particularly slovenly, family-run restaurant he visited in Mississippi. The restaurant gained notoriety and indeed some short lived success until it was forcibly closed by the owners who had a sense of humour failure when even physical abuse of the clientele wasn't enough to deter the hordes of malcontent-watchers.

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:40:00

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Created by: Rutilus

Pronunciation: Cus-time-eed

Sentence: Jackie couldn't believe how poor service was in the UK compared to the states. She was sick of being custymied by surly shop assistants. Bring on the flight back to LA!

Etymology: Customer - buyer, client; stymied - obstructed, blocked

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COMMENTS:

Excellent blend. - Mustang, 2008-05-13: 20:26:00

very nice - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-15: 06:36:00

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: närsəssərvis

Sentence: Meme just knew that some day soon she would be discovered by a Hollywood Producer or modeling agent. The only reason she was working at the Mall was because her mom just didn't understand how much money she needed for her wardrobe and makeup and, of course, for the exposure. As she provided narcisservice to her customers, and practiced her texting skills, she wondered why it was taking so long to become famous.

Etymology: narcissist (extreme selfishness, with a grandiose view of one's own talents and a craving for admiration) + service (the action of helping or doing work for someone)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: un siv ill ser vant

Sentence: Megan was definitely a most uncivilservant. She never allowed anything as insignificant as a customer to interrupt her busy day. She was in a deep phone conversation (the fourth today) with her best friend, Vanessa, who was on duty working in another store, two blocks away. Their brainy exchanges usually went "Well, he says,I don't know,like, what are you doing?" "And I go,like, I dunno" "And he says 'Whatever'". "Can you imagine? Like, as if." Megan carried on in this vein for like five or ten minutes, when a customer arrived at her till. The customer was getting impatient. Megan glowered at him and turned her back to continue her very important phone call. When the man started saying, "Excuse me", Megan reluctantly turned around and chewing gum loudly, with her phone jammed into her ear, gave him an impatient "What do you want?" gesture with hands and face. Too late she twigged he wore a balaclava and held a gun in one hand (pointed at her head)and a bag to collect the money he was going to rob from her till, in the other hand. "Oh-Ma-God", she thought, "My cell phone is dying..."

Etymology: uncivil(rude, impolite,lacking good manners) & servant (one who serves or provides a service) & civil servant for rhyming (a public official, member of the civil service)

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: dissed-sir-vissed

Sentence: June felt dissedserviced by the young cashier at the grocery. He was engrossed in texting his friends and flirting with the girls in the line next to him instead of paying attention to her. When she tried to get his attention he rolled his eyes. So, as a fequent customer, she felt justified in cussing him out.

Etymology: dissed: to show disrespect + serviced: assisted, helped

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