Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Barkless
Created by: josje
Pronunciation: barkless
Sentence: doing this it leaves your dog barkless
Etymology: barking and less
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Frogmentation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: frôgmentāshən
Sentence: When anybody asked, Rudy told people that had undergone a vocal frogmentation. He felt that it sounded less extreme and less selfish then having the vocal cords of his yappy little dog cut.
Etymology: Frog [in the throat] (Temporary hoarseness caused by phlegm in the back of the throat) + augmentation (improvement)
Goldenize
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: gōldənīz
Sentence: When Ron saw an ad from his vet offering to goldenize his dog he was intrigued. Control his dog’s barking? That sounded great. When he found out that it involved cutting the vocal cords he was stunned.
Etymology: golden (very favorable) + ize (suffix forming verbs) because ”silence is golden”
Yapectomy
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: yap ek tomee
Sentence: See Spot run. See Spot bark. Se Spot bark once too often, at anything. See Dick & Jane take Spot to Doctor Pepper for a yapectomy. See Spot run again. No see Spot bark again. See Dick & Jane get no more noise infraction tickets!
Etymology: Yap (yelp, bark) & Ectomy (removal, surgical excision of a part)
Yappytahappy
Created by: ekath
Pronunciation: yappy-tuh-happy
Sentence: After Fluffy's yappytahappy, the neighbors brought me homemade cookies
Etymology: yappy to happy
Muttmute
Created by: sodium
Pronunciation: mutt-myoot
Sentence: Because she kept scaring the neighbor kids, Ursula was taken to the vet to undergo a muttmute.
Etymology: mutt + mute
Snuffulated
Created by: paperhoard
Pronunciation: snuff-you-late
Sentence: After Sparky was vocally snuffulated I started yelling at the gerbil for squealing every time I touched the potato chip bag.
Etymology: Derived from the word SNUFF, to put a sudden end to.
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COMMENTS:
so cute though. - erasmus, 2007-01-30: 10:04:00
so cute though. This gets my vote but voting appears to be broken. - erasmus, 2007-01-30: 10:05:00
Thanks! - paperhoard, 2007-01-30: 11:50:00
also sounds like suffocated... Cute and scary! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 14:54:00
Oops - forgot about the "non-threatening" aspect of the word. The dog won't understand anyway! - paperhoard, 2007-01-30: 14:56:00
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Petpax
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: pet/pax
Sentence: Annoying pet-speak disturbing your home life? Welcome to the 21st century puppy-love solution!! Petpax, the new non-invasive (to you the owner) surgery, guarantees to reduce pet chatter by 95%. Pets will be silently happy the way they were meant to be. (WARNING: may attract intruders and wet spots on the carpet - no assembly necessary)
Etymology: pet + pax (peace)
Barkover
Created by: w5lf9s
Pronunciation: bar.kover
Sentence: looks like his poodle finally got a barkover. I haven't heard him for days.
Etymology: bark, over
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2