Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Vocaleskapi
Created by: ninjakane
Pronunciation: Vo-cal-esk-a-pea
Sentence: This dog needs a vocaleskapi stat!
Etymology: Australian
Shutupredure
Created by: pandafever
Pronunciation: shut-up-preedur
Sentence: Thanks to Yoda's shutupredure, Elaine is no longer going to be evicted.
Etymology:
Barkectomy
Created by: BMott
Pronunciation: bark-ek-to-me
Sentence: We took Yappi for a barkectomy after the neighbors complained about how noisy he was.
Etymology: Bark - The noise a dog makes. Ectomy - Removal of.
Marceauing
Created by: maxxy
Pronunciation: mar-SEW-ing
Sentence: Fluffy was a little hesitant -- he remembered how he he had thought "neutering" meant he'd get his own private fetch instructor -- but, still, the prospect of being marceaued just sounded so elegant.
Etymology: From Marcel Marceau, world-famous mime
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COMMENTS:
Clever! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 11:38:00
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Goldenize
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: gōldənīz
Sentence: When Ron saw an ad from his vet offering to goldenize his dog he was intrigued. Control his dog’s barking? That sounded great. When he found out that it involved cutting the vocal cords he was stunned.
Etymology: golden (very favorable) + ize (suffix forming verbs) because ”silence is golden”
Softenbark
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: soff-n-bach
Sentence: Fideaux the puppy's awful barking would clash with his owner's piano practice. So he was off to the vet to softenbark.
Etymology: soften (make quieter) + bark (dog noise) + offenbach (musical composer)
Larynicks
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: lari nix
Sentence: Fred had a smart, but yappy dog called Larry. So when Fred wanted to talk in front of Larry, he used pig-latin (or as he called it dog-latin). Fred told his wife he was taking Larry in the ar-cay to the eterinarian-vay, to ix-nay his larynicks and to have him eutered-nay. Poor Larry, after the operation, he lost his mojo and couldn''t tell anyone about it!
Etymology: Larynx (a cartilaginous structure at the top of the trachea; contains elastic vocal cords that are the source of the vocal tone in speech) & Nicks (cuts;cut slightly, with a razor)
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COMMENTS:
rebarkable - galwaywegian, 2011-01-18: 10:15:00
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Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Euphemutem
Created by: whimsy
Pronunciation:
Sentence: The euphemutem the vet used for the procedure calmed him down, at least for the couple of moments before the vet returned with various sharp instruments.
Etymology: euphemism + mute + them (mute'em)
Yelphelp
Created by: quippingqueen
Pronunciation: yelp/help
Sentence: The yodelling vet enthusiastically trilled on about how the yelphelp procedure was really quite simple - yank the yapping muscle once and for all.
Etymology: yelp + help
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COMMENTS:
Yonderful! - wordmeister, 2007-01-30: 12:39:00
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Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2