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'I'm getting my vocal cords tuned!'

DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.

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Verboticisms

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Barkmuffle

Created by: jedijawa

Pronunciation: bark-muff-el

Sentence: Fido had a barkmuffle performed so he won't have to worry about barking anymore.

Etymology: bark + muffle

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Yapotomy

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: yap-o-tə-mi

Sentence: After a week of mournful looks and silence from Fido, Mrs Smythe strongly suspected her neighbour had kidnapped the poor pooch in the night and performed a yapotomy.

Etymology: yap (of a small dog – to bark constantly) + -tomy (surgical incision)

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COMMENTS:

rough - galwaywegian, 2011-01-18: 10:14:00

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Muttmute

Created by: sodium

Pronunciation: mutt-myoot

Sentence: Because she kept scaring the neighbor kids, Ursula was taken to the vet to undergo a muttmute.

Etymology: mutt + mute

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Softenbark

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: soff-n-bach

Sentence: Fideaux the puppy's awful barking would clash with his owner's piano practice. So he was off to the vet to softenbark.

Etymology: soften (make quieter) + bark (dog noise) + offenbach (musical composer)

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Yappytahappy

Created by: ekath

Pronunciation: yappy-tuh-happy

Sentence: After Fluffy's yappytahappy, the neighbors brought me homemade cookies

Etymology: yappy to happy

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Voxtration

Created by: johnnyrockett

Pronunciation: Va-ks-tray-shion

Sentence: I took Fido to the vet so he could voxtrate him. He hasn't said a word since.

Etymology: Vox - Latin for voice traiton - as in castration

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Woofsterectomy

Created by: Bulletchewer

Pronunciation: wuff-ster-rect-o-mee

Sentence: Every dog has his day, and today, neighbourhood nuisance Rover was having a woofsterectomy.

Etymology: From "woof" meaning (dunno, don't speak dog)and "hysterectomy" meaning bye bye baby, baby goodbye....

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Goldenize

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: gōldənīz

Sentence: When Ron saw an ad from his vet offering to goldenize his dog he was intrigued. Control his dog’s barking? That sounded great. When he found out that it involved cutting the vocal cords he was stunned.

Etymology: golden (very favorable) + ize (suffix forming verbs) because ”silence is golden”

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Disembarking

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation:

Sentence: shep is much quieter sinc being disembarked, but every now and then he gets a rather worrying look on his face...

Etymology:

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COMMENTS:

very funny!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-01-31: 12:32:00

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Barkectomy

Created by: BMott

Pronunciation: bark-ek-to-me

Sentence: We took Yappi for a barkectomy after the neighbors complained about how noisy he was.

Etymology: Bark - The noise a dog makes. Ectomy - Removal of.

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Comments:

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...

Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...

wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...

mrskellyscl mrskellyscl - 2009-08-31: 08:07:00
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."

Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!

artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2