Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A non-threatening term to describe the procedure of cutting vocal cords on yappy dogs, which makes it sound like a good thing -- after all, they will never bark again. v. To remove the vocal chords.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Voxtration
Created by: johnnyrockett
Pronunciation: Va-ks-tray-shion
Sentence: I took Fido to the vet so he could voxtrate him. He hasn't said a word since.
Etymology: Vox - Latin for voice traiton - as in castration
Goldend
Created by: Buzzardbilly
Pronunciation: ˈgōl-dənd
Sentence: The vet goldend our dog, so we didn't get any warning barks when the burglars were coming.
Etymology: If silence is golden and you make something silent, wouldn't it be golden? Since the silence brings an end to the noise, wouldn't the procudure to rid the noisemaker of its noise-making abilities be a "gold end"? So, splicing "golden" and "end" makes "goldend."
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COMMENTS:
I have to add that the vet I used to work for refused to do the "de-barking" procedure (as they do call it) because the dogs still made noise and wore themselves out trying to bark. So, while my word fits the definition given, the procedure and its outcomes are at odds with the notion. - Buzzardbilly, 2009-08-31: 10:55:00
If it's cruel to "de-bark" a tree, how do our Canine-Americans feel about the procedure? - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:10:00
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Barkliptoyapatall
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: bar-CLIP-too-YAPP-at-all
Sentence: Tom had his cat de-clawed, his bird's wings clipped, his stallion gelded and his wife's feet bound. A legendary humanitarian, he had his beloved pooch submit to a painless BARKLIPTOYAPATALL operation in lieu of puncturing his own eardrumas with a shish-kabob skewer.
Etymology: bark+ clip+ to+ yap+ at+ all :)
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COMMENTS:
Welcome back, metro...it's been ruff, ruff without you! - Nosila, 2009-08-31: 13:19:00
Merci! - metrohumanx, 2009-09-01: 11:08:00
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Yapectomy
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: yap ek tomee
Sentence: See Spot run. See Spot bark. Se Spot bark once too often, at anything. See Dick & Jane take Spot to Doctor Pepper for a yapectomy. See Spot run again. No see Spot bark again. See Dick & Jane get no more noise infraction tickets!
Etymology: Yap (yelp, bark) & Ectomy (removal, surgical excision of a part)
Barkectomy
Created by: BMott
Pronunciation: bark-ek-to-me
Sentence: We took Yappi for a barkectomy after the neighbors complained about how noisy he was.
Etymology: Bark - The noise a dog makes. Ectomy - Removal of.
Frogmentation
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: frôgmentāshən
Sentence: When anybody asked, Rudy told people that had undergone a vocal frogmentation. He felt that it sounded less extreme and less selfish then having the vocal cords of his yappy little dog cut.
Etymology: Frog [in the throat] (Temporary hoarseness caused by phlegm in the back of the throat) + augmentation (improvement)
Dogcilise
Created by: Discoveria
Pronunciation: Dorg-sill-lies
Sentence: Are you tired of hearing that ceaseless yapping? Do you constantly wear earplugs? Then why not dogcilise young Rover? Swift and painless dogcilising facilities only at Golden Silences Vet Practice.
Etymology: Dog + docile: docile meaning quiet, meek. Also suggests 'sterilise'.
Yippysnippy
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: yip-py-snip-py
Sentence: Owner: "Peanut, your incessant barking has kept me from sleep too often. It's time to go to the vet and see what can be done." Peanut: "Yippysnippy"
Etymology: wordplay on Yippy-Skippy -- a sarcastic answer to anything you have to do or something that doesn't sound fun. Also can be used when you don't give a damn about something and want to use sarcasm (Urban dictionary). Yip: the shrill bark of a small dog + Snip: to sever with a small cut or incision
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COMMENTS:
Skippy peanut butter... - Nosila, 2009-08-31: 13:23:00
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Barkmuffle
Created by: jedijawa
Pronunciation: bark-muff-el
Sentence: Fido had a barkmuffle performed so he won't have to worry about barking anymore.
Etymology: bark + muffle
Softenbark
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: soff-n-bach
Sentence: Fideaux the puppy's awful barking would clash with his owner's piano practice. So he was off to the vet to softenbark.
Etymology: soften (make quieter) + bark (dog noise) + offenbach (musical composer)
Comments:
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:00:00
Wow! Lot's of funny words today!
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 12:19:00
Hey, I'm winning! Ooops, I'm the only player in this group...
Discoveria - 2007-01-30: 15:28:00
Some rather 'surgical' ones too...
wordmeister - 2007-01-30: 17:09:00
Yes, I suppose we have a lot of doctors who are contributing...
This happened to a dog in our neighborhood. The kids call him "Horace."
Nosila - 2009-08-31: 13:21:00
My friend's spaniel had his tail cut...so he's now called Bob!
artr2 - 2012-06-08: 06:42:00
Didn't play this round because I couldn't find the humor in this cruel, self-centered practice. ArtR2