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'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Verboticisms

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Masterverbate

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mas-ter-ver-beyt

Sentence: After Jim finished his daily masterverbating on everyone, going on and on about proper code of conduct they all felt icky and wanted to take a shower.

Etymology: masturbate + verb (as in verbal gratification through self-stimulation)

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COMMENTS:

Love it! "Master", as in I am so much better than you, should be in the etymology as well! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 18:08:00

Laughed long and hard! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:32:00

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Jargamorphosis

Created by: diyan627

Pronunciation: jar-gu-morf-u-sis

Sentence: There goes Tammy with her jargamorphosis again. She thinks the perplexed way I'm looking at her is fascination with her brilliance.

Etymology: jargon (Speech or writing having unusual or pretentious vocabulary, convoluted phrasing) + metamorphosis (A transformation, as by magic or sorcery. A marked change in appearance, character, condition, or *function*.) def from answers dot com

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COMMENTS:

kashman Simply brilliant and Kafka-ish! - kashman, 2008-03-09: 00:43:00

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Bigblurtzah

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: big - blurtz - ah

Sentence: Whether it be the professor, the politician, the military drill instructor, the businessman, or anyone, those who think they can confuse and impress with big words are just bigblurtzahs!

Etymology: Big: huge Blurtz: spewing big words without giving any thought to what is uttered. Zah: my own creation for a synonym for Ugh! A play on the expression Big Bertha!

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COMMENTS:

how true - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-06: 13:11:00

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Inflatulate

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: in/flach/u/late

Sentence: Joe dithered outside the bathroom door. The access instructions distributed at the 3 hour "securitized lavatory entrance system" meeting had seemed very clear at the time: choose #1 or choose #2. But, Joe now wondered, what about an employee requiring #1 AND #2? Had there been a third option? Why, oh why, had he not paid more attention to the inflatulated memo??? Joe shuffled off to find an HR rep who could help him with this rather pressing problem.

Etymology: inflate + flatulate

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COMMENTS:

spot on, Jam. - stache, 2008-03-06: 08:53:00

Nice blend. Could be used to describe what's done in the bathroom too! - Tigger, 2008-03-06: 10:11:00

Certainly has a special fl-air !!! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:06:00

Great word! Makes lots of 'scents'. - Mustang, 2008-03-06: 17:35:00

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Argotrate

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: (är'gĭ-trāt')

Sentence: "It's a clear case of res ipsa loquiter," Perry argotrated to the stunned group of assembled clients. "Ipso facto, we'll cut them off at their prima facie case."

Etymology: argot, A specialized vocabulary or set of idioms used by a particular group (from Fr. argot, "the jargon of Paris rogues and thieves," earlier "the company of beggars," from M.Fr., "group of beggars," , + -ate, used in english as a verb suffix.

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COMMENTS:

Your sentence and etymology shows you are great at argotrate! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:07:00

sounds lilke a real word - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-06: 13:15:00

if only I could spell like - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-06: 13:16:00

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Patroisnize

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: pa/traw/nize

Sentence: Please don't patroisnize me - I don't have my PHD in linguistics.

Etymology: patronize + patios

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COMMENTS:

Whew! Strong creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:29:00

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Blowphisticrat

Created by: twocent

Pronunciation: blow-fist-e&-krat

Sentence: Whenever he spoke with authority he came across with all the polish of a D.M.V. blowphisticrat.

Etymology: n. Compound of sophisticated: overly complicated, blow-hard: braggart and bureaucrat: a rigid official lacking intelligent judgment v. blowphisticate

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COMMENTS:

Very nice - OZZIEBOB, 2009-01-01: 00:04:00

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Normcrosbeing

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: norm croz bee ing

Sentence: Norma Crosby was the quintessential Normcrosbeing in our office. She thought by using big words (that she had seen in print, but apparently failed to check the definitions of), people would think she was far more educated than the Grade 10 level she had actually achieved, barely. When she had transferred into our HR Office, she felt it obliged her to speak far above the intellect of our internal clients, even if it meant inventing her own words. The clients were often left shaken and confused when she spoke in large words that had nothing to do with the topic at hand. As a result, people avoided her like the plague and chose not to believe any facts that she presented. Her personal crusade was that unless words were at least eight or ten letters long, why bother to use them?? It would be redumbdant and wasterly and youtilize no hexpediant deliverables.

Etymology: Norm Crosby - (Comedian, considered the Master of the Malaprop, who uses the wrong words, usually big ones to make confusing, funny comments.(i.e he speaks from his diagram and drinks decapitated coffee) & Being (a creature, a living person)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I swear we must have worked in the same place in a prior lifetime. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-31: 00:55:00

You are probably right...in "The Office"! And now you know why it is a hit! - Nosila, 2008-12-31: 23:11:00

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Acronimrod

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: ack-ro-nimm-rohd

Sentence: "Joe, on the DL, the entire PTC committee needs those TPS reports PDQ. GBTW and, get `em to me ASAP, or I'll tell HR or your GM that you're in AA and are faking being sick instead of using PTO hours. Then it'll be RIP for your career. - Rob Gathers" Joe deleted the acronimrod's email just as Anna Gathers emerged from the hotel room's bathroom in a schoolgirl outfit. "You know, Joe, if I wanted a workaholic ass, I'd be banging my husband," she sneered. Joe closed the laptop and placed it gently beside the bed.

Etymology: acronym + nimrod

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COMMENTS:

Good one, Banky,your STAT response encapsulates this scenario and empowers the disenfranchised to become key stakeholders in this etymological challenge! - Nosila, 2008-03-06: 01:07:00

So... Did those TPS reports ever get submitted? I'm dying to know! Lol. Love you mini-stories. - Tigger, 2008-03-06: 10:30:00

Superlative story and word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:14:00

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Blusterblather

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bləstərbleðər

Sentence: After years as a spokesperson for the utility company, Jill is so versed in blusterblather that she has trouble understanding her own twaddle.

Etymology: bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect) + blather (talk long-windedly without making very much sense)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James