Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Redundinstructions
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: ree dun din struk shuns
Sentence: One of the main problems with globalization (besides losing jobs in developed countries) is that buying manufactured goods abroad leaves you at the mercy of the person translating the directions for use into the English language. One such example of these redundinstructions was a little plastic kitchen tool Henry bought called a Real Remon Sqweezer. Written on a piece of paper inside the little box containing this tool were the words: "Push tool inside the lemon's skin and turn the apple right until the orange juice comes running out of the onion. Wash off tool before seizing another fruit".
Etymology: Redundant ( more than is needed, desired, or required;repetition of same sense in different words; superfluous) & Instructions ( a manual usually accompanying a technical device and explaining how to install or operate it)
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COMMENTS:
Oh man. I didn't see this one. Either we did it simultaneously or, dang, I need to drain some more of that morning oil. - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:48:00
No problem,z, great minds think alike!! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:41:00
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Retarditure
Created by: day4ghee
Pronunciation: RET-ARD-IT-URE
Sentence: BECKY SOON LEARNED THE IMPORTANCE OF RETARDITURE AFTER DROPPING HER MEGADRY 21,0000 IN THE TUB.
Etymology:
Redundaloquation
Created by: grohldberg12
Pronunciation: (ree-dun-duh-low-kway-zh[i]un
Sentence:
Etymology:
Uselessain
Created by: jack189
Pronunciation: Use-less-ain
Sentence: Joe turned over the bag of peanuts and saw a warning label "Do not eat if allergic to peanuts". "What a Uselessain!" said Joe aloud.
Etymology: Useless(to have no use)+ ain(sufix used to create new word, changed it to a noun)
Idiotified
Created by: tituba
Pronunciation: i di ot ti fied
Sentence: The lady was idiotified when she used her hairdryer in the shower.
Etymology: id iot i fied dumb in the brain
Ninnyguide
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: nĭn'ē-gahyd
Sentence: Examples of ninnyguides: ON A HAIRDRYER: *Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS: *You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: *Directions: Use like regular soap. FROZEN DINNER SERVING SUGGESTION: *Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP IN A BOX: *Fits one head. ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESSERT: *Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: *Product will be hot after heating. ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON: *Do not Iron clothes on body. ON BOOTS CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE: *Do not drive car or operate machinery. ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID): *Warning: May cause drowsiness. ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: *Warning: Keep out of children. ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: *For indoor or outdoor use only. ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR: *Not to be used for the other use. ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS: *Warning: contains nuts. ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS: *Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW: *Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
Etymology: From 'ninny' - a stupid foolish person, and 'guide' - something that offers basic information or instruction. It means foolish instructions for the fools.
Klutztructions
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /kluht-struk-shuhns/
Sentence: The klutztructions that came with Donna's toaster said not to use a knife to pry out the toast if it got stuck, so she shrugged and grabbed a fork instead.
Etymology: klutz - a stupid or foolish person(from Yiddish, klots "clumsy person") + instructions (from Latin, instructus "to put in order")
Dimstruction
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: dim-struhk-shuh n
Sentence: Many products come with dimstructions, directions that are so obvious or illconceived that most people don't even bother to read them.
Etymology: dim (not clear to the mind) + instruction (knowledge or information imparted)
Binstructions
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: binstrəkshənz
Sentence: Many products come with grinstructions, directions that are so ludicrous that you have to laugh. Others, especially those from power tools, have grimstructions with their graphic depictions of severed limbs. Ultimately all are binstructions, destined or a quick trip to the recycle container.
Etymology: bin (a receptacle in which to deposit trash or recyclables) + instructions (detailed information telling how something should be done, operated, or assembled)
Warnmenot
Created by: beardo
Pronunciation: Worn me not
Sentence: Kyle warnmenoted the instructions because he did not want to waste his time with common sense stuff.
Etymology: warn-inform, me-me, not- dont
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James