Verboticisms

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: funn dress sing

Sentence: I judged that the from the frost hardening on my spectacles that the hot redhead in the queue for the changing rooms was aware that she was being fundressed.

Etymology: undressing, fun

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COMMENTS:

I think I've fundrestimated all the weary shoppers - now I'm aware of the fundertones - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:40:00

that should be funderestimated - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:41:00

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: lye-a-round

Sentence: Tom didn't know why Mindy was so eager for his validation when she was buying clothes, but he had long since become accustomed to his role...he needed to liearound the dressing room, saying encouraging--though not completely honest-- things things like "No you're butt doesn't look fat" or "I don't think that black dress looks too much like your other black dress."

Etymology: lie in two senses--to not tell the truth and to lounge; around in the sense of either prevaricating or lounging in proximity to the shopping.

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Created by: legalalien

Pronunciation: BROW-dle

Sentence: Although Tiffany promised that it would only be a 3 minute ("I swear, you can time me!") detour into the Sephora store, Hank was left with nothing to do but browdle myriad products whose use he could not fathom.

Etymology: browse (look through or glance at casually) + dawdle (to waste time; idle; trifle; loiter)

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:08:00

Lovely word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:06:00

Like it! One can only sympathise with Hank. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:10:00

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Created by: kachungis

Pronunciation: ba-bee-boo

Sentence: im so babiboo!!

Etymology:

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mas/ter/weyt

Sentence: To keep her happy, he goes along shopping and masterwaits patiently for her while she tries on every pair of shoes in the store.

Etymology: MASTERWAIT - verb - from MASTER (a person who commands, or is in charge and of course SHE is) + WAIT (to be patient and remain neglected for a time)

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COMMENTS:

that's why guys wear such bulky overcoats - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:04:00

He thinks it's the best way to achieve "masterpeace" - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:49:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /buˈtikˌge(ɪ)t/

Sentence: We who are stuck boutiquegating our significant others are very thankful to those few store designers who thought to provide comfortable seating just outside the dressing rooms.

Etymology: from boutique + tailgate

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate

Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.

Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.

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COMMENTS:

I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00

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