Vote for the best verboticism.

'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Verboticisms

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Slowmad

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

metrohumanx Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Parcelmoany

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: par/sell/moany

Sentence: Parcelmoany is a state of extreme vexation when one is loaded down with expensive items he can't afford.

Etymology: parcel + parsimony (extreme econmoy) + moan

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Parcelmoany is inspired. I'd like to read more about the affliction. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:08:00

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Spreeander

Created by: ScrabbledEgg

Pronunciation: spree-an-durr

Sentence: Spreeandering about the mall for hours while Sandy tried on countless pairs of jeans left Jack barely coherent, and hungry. When he saw his honey finally emerge from her umpteenth dressing room, he grunted something about "done yet" and "food court" - much to her annoyance. "Geez, Jack, don't be such a Spreeanderthal" she retailiated (retail + retaliate), handing him the most expensive pair she had found.

Etymology: (shopping) spree + meander

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COMMENTS:

petaj Is that when he went off in perch haste? - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:47:00

At the end of a shopping spree a woman is tired as well as spent. Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:47:00

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Masterwait

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mas/ter/weyt

Sentence: To keep her happy, he goes along shopping and will masterwait patiently while she tries on every pair of shoes in the store.

Etymology: master (of course she is this) + wait

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COMMENTS:

Oh geez, I just now "got it"! Funny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-09-26: 11:55:00

joelb Ah you beat me to it!! >:) Voting now. - joelb, 2007-09-26: 21:55:00

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Mallancholy

Created by: Scrumpy

Pronunciation: mahl-uhn-kuhl-eee

Sentence: Dave went mallancholy as he stood holding Debra's handbag at the Emasculation Station outlet store.

Etymology: mall + melancholy

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 11:50:00

Seems as if Dave got himself into a eunuch predickament. Might decide to keep the handbag! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 22:19:00

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Contemplaza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: con/tem/pla/za

Sentence: While dutifully lugging bags around the mall like a pack mule, Chris would quietly contemplaza the meaning of life.

Etymology: contemplate + plaza

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COMMENTS:

Has he discovered what it is? If so, please let me know. Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:55:00

metrohumanx Always look on the BRIGHT side of lfe. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 01:29:00

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Mallinger

Created by: kabloozie

Pronunciation: Mahl-LING-er

Sentence: Two hours after the Wife entered Old Navy, Bob was seen in the food court, mallingering on the cement bench with an empty bag of Cinnabons.

Etymology: Mall: a large retail complex with no hardware stores. Linger: to pass time in a tedious manner.

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COMMENTS:

wow. my first verboticism....sniff. - kabloozie, 2007-09-26: 02:26:00

petaj It's a good one too. No auto parts stores in a Mall either. - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:44:00

good start! - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:22:00

wow - what a debut!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:42:00

Perhaps Bob should have lingered in lingerie boutique. Might not have been so teduous for him ! Good start:good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:44:00

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Guybrowse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Chickpick

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: chik-pik

Sentence: While Sue was in the dressing room, Bob bided his time with a chickpick session. The first object of his scrutiny was slightly plump, but had nice hair. The second had a nice body, but egad, that eye brow ring had to go! The third had it all going for her, except for the fact that she talked through her nose. The fourth...

Etymology: nit pick, chick

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COMMENTS:

petaj a chick picnic - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:45:00

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Shoperfunctorate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate

Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.

Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.

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COMMENTS:

I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James