Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Sapgrade
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: sap/grade
Sentence: Everytime our IT guys install a sapgrade on our systems they create havoc for us and overtime for them - maybe it's some kind of conspiracy.
Etymology: upgrade + sap (meaning both - a foolish person and also to sap energy)
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COMMENTS:
nice jw - galwaywegian, 2009-02-23: 10:06:00
sapgrades as part of a compspiracy - brilliant sentence and verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:28:00
Great word!! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:24:00
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Pleasewaiteternity
Created by: GlobalGallery
Pronunciation: pleez-wayt-urn-itee
Sentence: "That site has everything" proclaimed Charles, "All the coolest games, movies, and TV shows, and it's all free". William sat there staring eagerly at the screen. He was just moments away from accessing a treasure trove of quality content. Those moments became minutes and the loading bar kept restarting. William was facing a pleasewaiternity when he realised that the promise was too good to be true and the site was a dud. Then his keyboard, mouse and screen all locked up in synchronized chaos.
Etymology: Loading please wait... + eternity (forever)
Upgreyed
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: up graeed
Sentence: the upgrade upgreyed
Etymology: upgrade greyed out
Connixion
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kon iks eon
Sentence: Although she had been advised to do so, Marianne was reluctant to install another connixion to slow down her computer.
Etymology: Connexion ( the process of bringing ideas or events together in memory or imagination) & Nix (nothing;a quantity of no importance)
Webstuck
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: web stuk
Sentence: It takes so long for some embedded files, they should call them inbedded files, for they take all night! ET hated spyware, and wished they made spryware, a program for nimble and quick downloads. ET didn't call it a web stack, he called it a webstuck! While waiting for his software on demand to download, ET not only had time to phone home, but every one on his home planet!
Etymology: WEBSTUCK is a play on WEB STACK, Web stack is the term used to refer to software stacks in Web development environments. The stack of software, mainly comprised of open source software, will contain an operating system, Web server, database server, and programming language. One of the most most well-known web stacks is LAMP. Let us hope it will enlighten our way!
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COMMENTS:
very apt - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-23: 15:52:00
Like it - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:26:00
Beeee good! - Nosila, 2009-02-23: 21:48:00
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Freezamavista
Created by: kateinkorea
Pronunciation: FREE zah mah VEES tah
Sentence: June came in and found me working on her computer trying to give her the office upgrades. The next thing she's saying "Hasta la vista, Baby. Back away from my computer. You are not going to freezamavista." "Hasta la vista to you too June. And I won't be back," I told her.
Etymology: FREEZE: as in computer freeze MY: VISTA: operating system PLAY ON HASTA LA VISTA: see you later in Spanish
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Bugfixative
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv
Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.
Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)
Vaiogra
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: vai ou gra
Sentence: Minnie knew she had used too much vaiogra to upgrade her computer's performance. It had been more than four hours since she had not been able to turn off the computer and so it was now time to head to the PC emergency ward, before her terminal became terminal.
Etymology: Vaio ( a sub-brand used for many of Sony's computer products. Originally an acronym of Video Audio Integrated Operation, this was amended to Visual Audio Intelligent Organizer in 20080 & Viagra (virility drug (trade name Viagra) used to treat erectile dysfunction in men)
Floptimize
Created by: FreakyDeak
Pronunciation: flop-tim-eyes
Sentence: The decision to floptimize my computer was a wrong one, seeing as it can now barely perform addition.
Etymology: Flop-optimize
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COMMENTS:
It was either this or stoptimize - FreakyDeak, 2010-09-08: 02:53:00
nice - galwaywegian, 2010-09-08: 08:57:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James