Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Blindupdate
Created by: feltcap
Pronunciation: blīndŭp-dāt'
Sentence: Similar to that uneasy feeling you get when one of your friends sets you up he was nervous going into the blindupdate. He was worried that it would result in the same kind of feeling he had on his last blind date - will it ever end!?
Etymology: blind date - a social engagement between two persons who have not previously met, update - the act of instance of bringing something up to date
Useupgrade
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: use/up/grade
Sentence: The patch to fix the program uses more memory than the program itself, making it a useupgrade rather than a viable program.
Etymology: USEUPGRADE - from - USE UP + UPGRADE
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COMMENTS:
Good one! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:27:00
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Pleasewaiteternity
Created by: GlobalGallery
Pronunciation: pleez-wayt-urn-itee
Sentence: "That site has everything" proclaimed Charles, "All the coolest games, movies, and TV shows, and it's all free". William sat there staring eagerly at the screen. He was just moments away from accessing a treasure trove of quality content. Those moments became minutes and the loading bar kept restarting. William was facing a pleasewaiternity when he realised that the promise was too good to be true and the site was a dud. Then his keyboard, mouse and screen all locked up in synchronized chaos.
Etymology: Loading please wait... + eternity (forever)
Dualsnore
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr
Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.
Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)
Upgrate
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: uhpgreyt
Sentence: When the start-up chime on your computer sounds more like fingernails on a chalkboard, it might be an indication that the the latest upgrate isn't operating in quite the way it was expected to.
Etymology: upgrade (to incorporate new or more accurate information) + grate (to scrape or rub with rough or noisy friction)
Executabledysfunction
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ecks-uh-cute-abuhl-dis-FUNCT-shun
Sentence: Brad cursed his aging laptop when it experience severe executabledysfuntion when he tried to download and install a system update of utmost importance.
Etymology: Blend of 'executable' (An executable file is a file that is used to perform various functions or operations on a computer) and 'dysfunction' (when something doesn't operate normally), a play on the term 'erectile dysfunction'
Floptimize
Created by: FreakyDeak
Pronunciation: flop-tim-eyes
Sentence: The decision to floptimize my computer was a wrong one, seeing as it can now barely perform addition.
Etymology: Flop-optimize
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COMMENTS:
It was either this or stoptimize - FreakyDeak, 2010-09-08: 02:53:00
nice - galwaywegian, 2010-09-08: 08:57:00
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Connixion
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kon iks eon
Sentence: Although she had been advised to do so, Marianne was reluctant to install another connixion to slow down her computer.
Etymology: Connexion ( the process of bringing ideas or events together in memory or imagination) & Nix (nothing;a quantity of no importance)
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James