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'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Verboticisms

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Officade

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: aw-fuh-sahd

Sentence: Stanley likes to make everybody think he is the most productive member of his team. He creates a smokescreen by creating an officade of papers and folders that practically obscure his window and keep prying eyes from seeing how little actual work he does.

Etymology: office (a room, set of rooms, or building where the business of a commercial or industrial organization or of a professional person is conducted) + facade (a superficial appearance or illusion of something)

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Dosserier

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

petaj No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Escaperwork

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: ess-KAY-pur-wurk

Sentence: Just before weekly staff meetings, Joe's pile of escaperwork would grow to include three reports, two manila envelopes, a stapler and a large black binder labelled 'URGENT'.

Etymology: escape (to avoid) + paperwork (documents)

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Disstacktion

Created by: Clayton

Pronunciation: di-STAK-shuhn

Sentence: Luckily, the Greenly account provided Clarence with a momentary disstacktion as he fumbled to exit GTA: San Andreas. If Mrs. Worthington realized he'd beaten her insane stunt bonus, he could kiss that nickel-an-hour raise goodbye.

Etymology: distraction + stack

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COMMENTS:

I must confess I sometimes build a little fortress of files. It makes playing verbotomy much simpler - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:51:00

I'm really glad that I don't work in an office, but a file fortress does sound like fun. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:37:00

you get a vote for being such a fun verbotomist - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:49:00

Thanks... I didn't put much thought into today's word, as I'm nursing a wounded shoulder. There have been a lot of great words this week, though. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 20:34:00

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Phantofiles

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/toe/files

Sentence: Joe had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's been working on six different projects today and it's only noon." Joe's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: PHANTOFILES - noun - from PHANTOM (an appearance, or illusion without material substance) + FILES (a container, or folder for keeping papers in order)

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COMMENTS:

I worked with a guy that did that...he got away with it until his new female boss figured him out and gave him the boot! - Nosila, 2008-08-06: 00:50:00

pesty female bosses! - scrabbelicious, 2008-08-06: 06:43:00

metrohumanx What datum lurks in the hearts of men?Only the Phantofile knows. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 11:25:00

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Fibdjet

giveaphuk

Created by: giveaphuk

Pronunciation: Fib De Jet

Sentence: she fibdjeted with pieces of paper while looking @ the clock waiting from home time.

Etymology: Fib = to like & djet - ending of word fidget - meaning to behave or move nervously or restlessly.

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Phantofiles

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/tuh/files

Sentence: John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: phantom + files

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COMMENTS:

phantastic - Nosila, 2010-01-07: 18:50:00

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Fobject

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: fob-jekt

Sentence: Shuffling papers whilst wearing my glasses on the end of my nose is the most effective combination of fobjects I have found. It creates the illusion that I'm actually doing what I'm paid to do.

Etymology: Fob -(as in 'fob off', deceive or dupe) + object = fobject

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COMMENTS:

Short and snappy - I could use this. :) - Discoveria, 2012-09-26: 12:14:00

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Figmendation

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fig men day shun

Sentence: As a long time civil servant in the federal Department of the Obscure and Forgotten Files, Roger was the King of the Toadies. He spent his entire workday carrying around a file folder which was labelled S.M.A.R.T. It looked very official and proved to the innocent bystander or visitor that Roger was a man with a special mission and purpose in his work. In fact the S.M.A.R.T. File was a figmendation. It usually contained a crossword puzzle or scratch & win cards, which Roger would spend his days at work playing. His co-workers thought that the S.M.A.R.T. stood for Segregated Modules Actualizing Relative Theory. In fact, the S.M.A.R.T. acronym actually stood for See Me Avoiding Real Toil. Yes, Roger was also known by his more popular nickname: The SmartFile Dodger!

Etymology: figment (a contrived or fantastic idea, i.e: a figment of the imagination) & mendacious (intentionally untrue;lying)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Did Riger work at the Texas Blog Suppository? Ya crack me up, Nose! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-06: 16:37:00

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Assumetote

Created by: jadenguy

Pronunciation: as OOM tot

Sentence: Like a vampire hunter to the cross, he lept across his cubicle and grabbed a stack of printed material on company letterhead as his boss approached; his assumetote being just enough of a ruse to confuse his superior for perhaps another week. His smokescreen-jobsaver spreadsheet was already drawing suspicion as to exactly how much time he spent playing internet word games!

Etymology: assume + tote + asymptote assume (people assume you are working ) + tote (to carry) + asymptote (to infinitely approach something (work))

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COMMENTS:

yeah, like people play internet word games at work! implausible. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:40:00

Can I have a copy of that spreadsheet? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 13:52:00

you come up with very creative sentences jadenguy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:51:00

i try. i try. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 17:12:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-06-13: 00:01:00
The "S" in Timothy Johnson's GUST stands for Strategy. And strategy is key! Especially if you are trying to get way with doing nothing. Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram and Timothy! ~ James

Rebekah - 2009-11-05: 18:33:00
Protaskinate

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-01-07: 00:38:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James