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'Don't leave me out here! I'm not dead yet!'

DEFINITION: v., To put an unwanted houseplant, especially a seasonal or gift plant like a Poinsettia or Easter Lily, outdoors in hopes that it will die. n., An unwanted houseplant which has been left to nature.

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Verboticisms

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Floracide

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: floor-a-side

Sentence: I confess. I am a floracidal maniac - a plant serial killer. Every Christmas, Easter and Mother's Day my family, with the best of intentions, sends me a beautiful, innocent potted martyr and my black thumb condemns them to a sad and bitter ending on the porch alone without food, water or a means of escaping the elements. The doorbell rings and I can hear the poor thing scream, "Noooooo!" as my daughter announces, "Mom, your victim's here."

Etymology: flora: plant life of a particular region or time; the goddess of flowers + -cide: suffix that denotes the act of killing

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Herbamortem

elisabeth

Created by: elisabeth

Pronunciation: The a and b are silent. Herr-mortem

Sentence: Your foxtail fern is herbamortem. OH NO!

Etymology: Dutch

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Arborwinism

MissRabbit

Created by: MissRabbit

Pronunciation: Arr-bore-win-ism

Sentence: A guilty arborwinist, Meg got so depressed watching her holiday flowers slowly shrivel away that she finally abandoned them to the elements.

Etymology: A mix of arbor (relating to trees/plants) and Darwinism (survival of the fittest)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Shundashrub, also. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:45:00

metrohumanx Wabbits are not kind to shwubs. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:45:00

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Ostraponicaw

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: oss-trip-ONIC-awww

Sentence: Herb really loved Lilly, but he only tolerated her infatuation with plants. Lilly had a necrarium in the living room in which nothing greater than fungi would grow. In the kitchen, spiderplants threatened Herb's every move. Forest litter and detritus was accumulating under the end tables. Herb, not being especially gifted at conflict resolution, decided to convert one houseplant each night into an OSTRAPONICAW. He gave secret thanks to the Frost Giants who visited the doorstep and turned each rare succulent into a slimy mass of burst cells which no plant food spike could ever hope to revive. Poor Lilly. AWWWWWWWWWWW

Etymology: OSTRAcise+hydroPONIC+AWWWW= OSTRAPONICAW .....OSTRACISE:a method of temporary banishment without trial or special accusation ; exclusion by general consent from common privileges or social acceptance.....HYDROPONICS:the growing, however unsucessfully, of plants in nutrient solutions without an inert medium (as soil) to provide mechanical support.....AWWW: 21st century exclamation intended to express dismay or mock sympathy, often uttered at the demise of an unloved decorative companion.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx The BEST source for planty stuff: http://www.jlhudsonseeds.net/ - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:38:00

metrohumanx OSTRAPONICS: The Not growing of plants on any viable medium. Plants which thrive on abuse are particularly suited to this merhod of floracide. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-13: 01:42:00

how cruel - Jabberwocky, 2008-10-13: 14:08:00

metrohumanx Now that i look at OSTRAPONICAW, it sounds like an endangered sub-tropical bird. Oh well- there are no provisions for "taking back" a word, i guess. - metrohumanx, 2008-10-14: 02:51:00

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Herbieuthanasia

Created by: worldkitsch

Pronunciation: erbe-u-than-asia

Sentence: By the time it was April and that stupid poinsetta hadn't died, I was forced to committ herbieuthanasia.

Etymology:

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Killant

Created by: yaelash

Pronunciation: ki-llant

Sentence: every time she got flowers or anything green, she couldn't hold on to it for more than a couple of days. soon she would take it outside, killanting it as usual.

Etymology: kill + plant

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Botanicull

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Bot-anee-cull

Sentence: Mary Gold's love of plants had got a bit out of hand just lately. Her husband came up with a plan to reduce the numbers, he decided it was time to botanicull them one by one. He started with the poinsettia that was bought for show last christmas, it had seen better days he thought to himself, so he took the pot down to the bottom of the garden and put it round the back of his shed, sure that his wife would not notice it had gone he left it out ready for the elements to do the rest.

Etymology: Botany(the study of plants) + Cull(to kill, reduce the numbers of) = Botanicull

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-10-13: 14:05:00

Maybe there is a botanineed for a botanicull afterall. - Nosila, 2008-10-13: 20:19:00

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Bloomingales

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: bloom/in/gales

Sentence: Chris carefully positioned all his Christmas plants in the shelter of the taller conifers hoping that Darwin's theory would prove correct and they might survive. It wasn't enough though to protect them from the blizzard and gale force winds and the little plants cried out to him "Why do you love us only at Christmas? We're not bred to bloomingales.

Etymology: bloom + gales + bloomingdales

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COMMENTS:

Bloomingales, a great place to chop...errr..shop - Mustang, 2008-10-13: 08:49:00

A plant is not just for christmas!! - TJayzz, 2008-10-13: 09:01:00

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Aspidostracize

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ass pid oss tra size

Sentence: Marvin's Mother-In-Law, Lily, finally went home after her 3 week visit. It was the longest 3 weeks of Marvin's life, as his Mother-in-law was only to eager to point out Marvin's short-comings in fixing up their new place. His wife, Fern, thought it was sweet that her mother had given them a lovely houseplant as a house-warming gift. The Aspidistra was attractive with healthy green foliage, but it constantly reminded Marvin of Lily, so he decided to aspidostracize it in the hopes it would die of neglect outside. It not only survived on the front porch, it thrived and luckily the climate was suitable for it year round. Pretty soon the entire front flower bed was populated with it's baby plants, which also flourished. But every time Marvin came near the plants, he felt they were watching him. They had pistils and they knew how to use them and they were planning to plant him outside soon, too.

Etymology: Aspidistra (evergreen perennial with large handsome basal leaves; grown primarily as a foliage houseplant...also known as Cast Iron Plant,Barroom Plant) & Ostracize (shun;banish;expel from a community or group)

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Poinsettiacide

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: poyn-set-tea-yuh-side

Sentence: Tired of looking at the ostentatious white Easter lily on the television, I set it outside during a cold snap, knowing I was commiting poinsettiaside, but not caring.

Etymology: poinsettia: traditional Christmas flower, traditionally given as a "oops I forgot you" gift -on par with Hickory farms platters. + -cide: suffix -act of killing

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COMMENTS:

Spot on, Belle. I love the etymolygy -- 'Hickory Farms platters'... Hahaha!! Classic. - Tigger, 2007-11-18: 20:30:00

libertybelle My brother and I call Hickory farms platters as the gift that says "%*&@ you - just be happy i got you something" - libertybelle, 2007-11-21: 09:44:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-14: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird! ~ James'

purpleartichokes - 2007-11-14: 04:19:00
How ironic, I just did this yesterday with some cilantro that developed a wicked case of spider mites. Now I get to feel the guilt allll over again.

Jabberwocky - 2007-11-14: 15:22:00
I got a phone call from cilantro - he said "Save me purple - it's not too late"

purpleartichokes - 2007-11-14: 18:32:00
I hate you Jabber. Here come the nightmares... "I'm freeeeezing!"

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-11-14: 23:02:00
The cilantro is just the tip of the iceberg! I heard that Purple iced her entire crop artichokes, which she was **trying** to grow hydroponically in her basement. That is until she saw her electricity bill quadruple. Just think of all those poor baby artichokes... It's sad, until you think -- Purple probably would have ate them anyways. ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-11-14: 23:08:00
Tip of the iceberg *lettuce*, you mean.

purpleartichokes - 2007-11-15: 06:54:00
Now I'm all choked up... guess I'll start eating more meat.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-03-10: 00:08:00
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James

artr artr - 2010-03-10: 12:20:00
A friend suggested a very scary thought. She says that the verbotomists should get together and have a \"meet & greet\".

mrskellyscl mrskellyscl - 2010-03-10: 12:46:00
Sounds good. We could have a convention in Verbena, Alabama