Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: af front per son

Sentence: Venoma had found the perfect job. She worked as an affrontperson for the telephone company at their fancy head office. It was jokingly called the Customer Service Dept; but employees there were encouraged to trade insults with patrons, both in person and over the phone. She worked with 2 others, Rudy & Curt and she always won the insult competitions the department had each week. Her family motto was, "The best defence is a good offense" and she strived to live up to that motto. Imagine her surprise when they were all told that the company was closing shop locally and farming it's business overseas...globalization it was called. But Venoma landed on her feet by being sent overseas to train the new employees on how to insult the customers, even with a strong foreign accent.

Etymology: Afront (a deliberately offensive act or something producing the effect of an affront;treat, mention, or speak to rudely) & Person (a human being)

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COMMENTS:

Hilarious and so true! Love the names Venoma, Rudy and Curt, too! - splendiction, 2009-11-09: 20:22:00

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Created by: skyliner

Pronunciation: Anyway you say it, it's very right.

Sentence: When I want to be harassed by a coultergeist, I'll call my ex-wife.

Etymology: From the Yahoo for Fox haunting.

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Created by: jonobo

Pronunciation: "vulgar" like vulgar, "essional" like in professional.

Sentence: He was the highest ranking vulgaressional in business - they simply called him "The Vulgarator" (but friends called him simply jonobo).

Etymology: vulgar + professional = vulgaressional

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: RICK-LUHR (rickled)

Sentence: Forget the banker and the TV sales maven… They’re not so clever- just clumsy and craven. Worse than a sort of a mental french tickler- Is an insult received from a really sick RICKLER

Etymology: The master: Don Rickles. A stand-up and club comic for over 60 years, Rickles all but invented insult comedy.

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COMMENTS:

http://www.wolframalpha.com/ - metrohumanx, 2009-11-09: 02:23:00

You rickled my funny bone... - Nosila, 2009-11-09: 21:53:00

You are COMPOSED of funny bones, Kiddo! - metrohumanx, 2009-11-10: 04:57:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Hek-el-an-gybe

Sentence: At the weekends Neil was the typical family guy, but when he was at work he was a real Heckleanjibe, his job was to insult people for a living and he was so successful, that they came back for more time and again. But come Friday afternoon he was almost back to his normal pleasant self again.

Etymology: Heckle(To interrupt with derisive comments and abuse) + Jibe(An insulting or mocking remark) = Heckleanjibe). See Jekyll and Hyde(has come to mean a person who may show a distinctly different character from one situation to the next.

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COMMENTS:

Great word...nowadays they's call it bi-polar or split personality, but we've all known people like him, sadly... - Nosila, 2008-07-01: 02:29:00

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: dih-sen-der

Sentence: Brad didn't actually do anything but unleash well timed zingers to his office mates on a daily basis, they would call him a dissender but he liked to think of it as morale maintenance.

Etymology: Diss - Sender, Dissenter

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Created by: verysimplegame

Pronunciation: aff-runt-er-ol-o-jist

Sentence: Jillian, a reknowned affronterologist, could peel the ego off a grown man in less than 15 seconds.

Etymology: affrontery + ologist

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: chīdandsēk

Sentence: After the hazard warning by Consumer Reports the job of the Customer Disservice Representatives is to do their best to shift the blame for problems back on to customers. With a technique they call chideandseek, they admonish callers for not following the overly-complicated owners manual that includes such sage wisdom as using safety goggles and chain-mail gloves when using any sharp product. If guilt does*t work, the trump card is to suggest that they are passing the call to a supervisor. Of course, all this does is put them back into the maze of a phone tree system.

Etymology: chide (scold or rebuke) + hide-and-seek (a children*s game in which one player tries to find other players who have hidden themselves)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: a/boos/dry/vur

Sentence: This morning there was a subway shut down so I had to take the bus and listen to abusedriver hurl insults at every unsuspecting passenger who tried to exit by the front doors

Etymology: bus driver + abuse

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /SKOF-uh-ser/

Sentence: Mr. C. really only had one true talent — making scathing comments and delivering insults that could bring many people to tears. Fortunately, he had a job where he could do exactly that, a real mockupation. His job as a scofficer was to ridicule other people's talents, (or lack of talents). To the latest singing contestant he said, "If you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, they would have stoned you." Then, as expected, Paula slapped his right arm and began to scold him, while Randy just shook his head and tried not to laugh, saying "Yo dog, that was cold, Simon."

Etymology: Scoff - to speak derisively; mock; jeer (from Old Norse, skaup "mockery") + Officer - a person who holds a position of rank or authority in an organization (from Latin, officium "service, duty")

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COMMENTS:

Great word...love the American Idol reference...yes, Mr.C. can be scoffensive, but that's why we love him! - Nosila, 2008-07-01: 02:27:00

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