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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Kinddesirity

Created by: greenbree

Pronunciation: ka/in/de/sai/ri/ti

Sentence: yesterday my boyfriend do a kindesirity thing, opening the door of the car for me.

Etymology: kind+desire

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Assistocramp

Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation:

Sentence: That girl was so hot that I had an assistocramp and shut her purse in the car door.

Etymology: assistance + cramp

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Recomime

Created by: Kevcom

Pronunciation: rea-ko-meeme

Sentence: Danny shot a helpful recomime to the old lady waiting on the subway platform at Glencairn, Glencairn station, but was unfortunately left behind and delayed by the slowness of the old lady, and by the speed at which the doors open and close on the rocket.

Etymology: recoil + pantomime

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Chivalgaffe

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: shiv-uh l-gaf

Sentence: Robert commited a chivalgaffe when he closed the car door on his dates leg.

Etymology: ME: chivalrie + F: gaffe

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COMMENTS:

Also chivalwrong - milorush, 2007-10-26: 09:24:00

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Fewtility

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyoo til lit tee

Sentence: Fewbert's heroic gestures towards his fewture wife, Fewgenia, were often attempts in fewtility. Like when he placed his coat over a puddle in the street for her, only to discover that it actually covered an open manhole. Or when he chased her cat FewFew through hill & dale, caught it, was scratched to death and brought it home to her, only to find the real FewFew happily sitting in front of the hearth at home. Poor Fewbert, his fewtile efforts made Fewgenia think that a fewture with Fewbert might be fewtile, at least until after he passed fewberty.

Etymology: Few (an indefinite but relatively small number) & Futility (uselessness as a consequence of having no practical result)

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COMMENTS:

Beware the fewmious bandersnatch.... - Mustang, 2008-09-25: 00:02:00

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Fauxcilitation

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: (n.) fō-sĭl'ĭ-tā'shən; (tr. v.) fō-sĭl'ĭ-tāt'

Sentence: Henri's poor reflexes and terrible eyesight usually turn his eager attempts to help his friends into nightmarish and dangerous moments of fauxcilitation which usually finish up at the local emergency room.

Etymology: Faux = from faux pas = blunder + [fac]ilitation = The act of making easy or easier.

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COMMENTS:

A shade of meaning might include a subconscious lack of desire to actually help out, which might lead to a purposeful poor or "fake" ("faux") effort to assist. - milorush, 2007-10-26: 07:04:00

A shade of meaning might include a subconscious lack of desire to actually help out, which might lead to a purposefully poor or "fake" ("faux") effort to assist. - milorush, 2007-10-26: 07:05:00

Interesting and good blend! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:28:00

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Floormeetface

Created by: vasunlover

Pronunciation:

Sentence: I went to open the door for him, and by golly, oops, floormeetface.

Etymology:

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Flubanthropy

Created by: zavijava

Pronunciation:

Sentence: His act of flubanthropy not only resulted in a wet coat, it sent her to the emergency room with a sprained ankle.

Etymology: flub+philanthropy

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Ineptsuavitis

Created by: mryder

Pronunciation: in-ept / swah-ve / itis

Sentence: Billy would have loved to open the door for the pretty girl; however his ineptsuavitis set in and he ended up getting himself trapped in the door.

Etymology: inept-ORIGIN originally in the sense unsuitable: from Latin ineptus, from in- ‘not’ + aptus ‘fitted. Suave-ORIGIN Latin suavis ‘agreeable’ itis (suffix)— ORIGIN from Greek -ites

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Shrivelry

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: shriv el ree

Sentence: When he got caught twice in the revolving door after allowing his date to go through first, Lance A. Lott experienced the agony of shrivelry. Once a knight is enough.

Etymology: Shrivel (to wither;decrease in size,range or extent) & Chivalry (gallantry,courtesy,medieval principles of knighthood)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James