Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.
Verboticisms
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Dentachatter
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: dentachatər
Sentence: To avoid the dentachatter Ron would sometimes pretend to doze off. Even when he flinched the dentist allowed him to continue the ruse.
Etymology: dental (of or relating to the teeth) + chatter (talk rapidly or incessantly about trivial matters)
Qandaches
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kew and ayks
Sentence: Dr. Yvonne is one multi-tasking dentist. She can mask up, get both fists in your mouth simultaneously, probe and scrape and poke and pull and all the while, ask what you thought about medical/political/societal and philosophical issues, while giving you the benefit of her own thoughts on each topic and understanding your feeble, numb, unintelligible answers. At the same time, she gives verbal notes to her dental assistant for your file, as she tells her what she needs next and calculates your bill and how much your insurance will pay for each treatment. Yes, she has QandAches down to a fine science. No wonder they call her Leader of the Plaque!
Etymology: Q and A (Questions and Answers)& Aches (a dull persistent (usually moderately intense) pain; be the source of pain;feel physical pain)
Blahnaesthesia
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: blah nast eee zya
Sentence: The blahnaesthesia ended up being more painful than the filling.
Etymology: anaesthesia, blah
Chatquilizer
Created by: rikboyee
Pronunciation: chat-kwil-eye-zer
Sentence: she had become quite adept at chatquilizing her patients
Etymology: chat, tranquilizer
Communicache
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke
Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.
Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)
Faqsdicine
Created by: vmalcolm
Pronunciation: /fæksdsin/
Sentence: While she was attending him, she engaged in a little faqsdicine to relax him a bit.
Etymology: FAQSDICINE. From FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions) + Medicine (the science which relates to the prevention, cure, or alleviation of disease)
Yaplacate
Created by: Kevcom
Pronunciation: Yeah-plaa-kate
Sentence: Mr. Smith, the family doctor of the Joneses, often yaplicated to his patients so that he could carry on in his torturous dentistry operations without recieving yelps and complaints from his patients.
Etymology: yap (talk), placate (sooth)
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COMMENTS:
Says it all! - FayeWord, 2007-10-17: 17:47:00
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Whynecology
Created by: lumina
Pronunciation: wi/neck/ol/ojee
Sentence: It's bad enough for us ladies to endure what we do annually. Would it be too much to ask that we don't have to also engage in meaningless whynecology?
Etymology: Why? Why, oh why????????? :) and Gynecology
Obligastory
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: oh/blig/a/storee
Sentence: Every six months I am muzzled and forced to listen to the dentist's obligastory about his three sons - almost as boring as his drill.
Etymology: obligatory + story
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James
lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology
lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James