Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Irebuyer
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: ahy-ur-BAHY-uhr
Sentence: Bob quickly became an irebuyer, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.
Etymology: Conflation of IRE:anger, wrath, rage, & BUYER:purchaser, vendee, client
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COMMENTS:
Rhyming creations always ring my bell. Nice one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:06:00
His argument definately had some holes in it. No holes in your word though! - bananabender, 2008-01-17: 02:27:00
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Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
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COMMENTS:
Maybe if they listen to the soft rock of "Bread" they won't be so crusty! Another great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:21:00
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Custobluster
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəbləstər
Sentence: The store wasn’t even open yet but there he was, Mr. Bellow. At least that’s what Carlos and his coworkers call him. He is full of custobluster, all too ready to scream and yell about whatever minor issue he could find. He doesn’t really worry Carlos that much. He can easily be distracted by the introduction of the newest ”shiny thing”.
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect)
Counterattacker
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Cown-ter-at-aker
Sentence: Jerry was used to dealing with awkward customers, but when it came to Mr Pennyworth, the serial counterattacker, he was at a complete loss. Jerry dreaded the moment when he walked through the doors of his hardware shop. He never actually bought anything but he would continually come to the counter with various items and proceed to tell anyone who would listen that the products were inferior. He then ranted on that things were made to a much higher standard in his day and were made to last. Jerry was just grateful that Mr Pennyworth was well known for his rants all over town, and his other customers never took him seriously.
Etymology: Counter(a long flat-topped fitment over which goods are sold to customers) + Attacker(someone who takes agressive action) = Counterattacker
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COMMENTS:
Talk about a need for Counterintelligence! Good Word - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:43:00
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Bullygoat
Created by: bananabender
Pronunciation: bul / li / gote
Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!
Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly
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COMMENTS:
"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00
I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00
Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00
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Consuminad
Created by: missyfrose
Pronunciation: con-soo-min-ad
Sentence: That consuminad has some serious self-esteem issues. Don't consuminate to me, I'm not your therapist!
Etymology: consumer, inadequate
Flustomer
Created by: Biscotti
Pronunciation: flus toh mer
Sentence: Working in retail, I've had many a flustomer in my face!
Etymology: Fluster (angry, upset) + Customer (one who buys things from someone else)
Schmucack
Created by: courty3303
Pronunciation: sh-moo-sack
Sentence: I schmucacked that idiot.
Etymology:
Tirate
Created by: yellowbird
Pronunciation: ty-rate
Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.
Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James