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'Why did you tell the cleaners to come so early?'

DEFINITION: n. Redundant and often clumsy preparations made before meeting with a "professional" -- like a hairdresser, dentist or cleaning lady. v. To prepare for a meeting with a professional by trying to hide the fact that you desperately need their services.

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Verboticisms

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Bedlamouflage

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: bed lam o flahj

Sentence: As the doorbell announcing the arrival of their new cleaning lady rang, they looked around. The bedlamouflage would work as long as she didn't touch the cupboard door, look in the guest bathroom and the sedatives they'd given the cat didn't wear off too soon.

Etymology: bedlam, camouflage

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COMMENTS:

:-) - silveryaspen, 2009-03-26: 10:02:00

Funny beddy bye-bye story! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-26: 10:15:00

excellent - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-26: 12:32:00

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Fauxlishness

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: foh-lihsh-nehs

Sentence: Fulvia's life was full of fauxlishness. Not only did she dye her roots before going to the hairdressers and blame the Care Bears for her immaculate house when the cleaning lady arrived, but she had two dentists and two spiritual confessors in two different cities.

Etymology: Using FAUX, meaning fake or artificial + a play on FOOLISHNESS, meaning a lack of good sense or judgement

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COMMENTS:

heheh - galwaywegian, 2009-03-26: 08:55:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-26: 09:21:00

Excellent word! - splendiction, 2009-03-26: 21:17:00

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Prephairedness

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: prep hair ed ness

Sentence: Tressa had touched up her roots and trimmed her bangs the night before. She showered and shampooed her hair three times that morning. She then blew dry her hair with a rolling brush, styled her hair with mousse and curled it with her curling iron. After spending three hours doing her hair, she declared a state of prephairedness and she rushed out of the house to get to her 10:00 am hair appointment. When her stylist saw the roots and her bangs, she asked who had done this to her hair. She replied, "Why, you did!" Little did she know that hair stylists have forensic skills and after intense questioning, our client broke down and admitted her desperation. Her stylist said, "Why Tressa of the Ubervilles, all you had to do was make your appointment a few days sooner!"

Etymology: preparedness(the state of having been made ready or prepared for use or action) & Hair (any of the cylindrical filaments characteristically growing from the epidermis of a mammal;dense growth of hairs covering the body or parts of it (as on the human head); helps prevent heat loss)

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Remuddle

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: re-MUDL

Sentence: As always, Darryl hated going to the barber since he knew he'd receive some good natured jibes about his thinning hair, so he once again set out to remuddle his hairdo in an effort to hide the balding areas.

Etymology: Based on 'muddle' (to mix up in a confused or bungling manner; jumble) with prefix 're-' (to do again)...a play on the word 'remodel.

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Primpemptive

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: primp/em/tiv

Sentence: As a primpemtive strike before heading off to her hair colourist Sally dyes any telltale roots.

Etymology: primp + preemptive

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COMMENTS:

No fool like an old fool ... perfiction! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-26: 10:07:00

perfect word... - mweinmann, 2009-03-26: 17:17:00

Sally knows how to get to the root of the problem. Great word! - Mustang, 2009-03-26: 22:09:00

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Slicandsham

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: SLIC and SHAM

Sentence: Occasionally my wife uses a cleaning service when she is really busy and she needs the place especially clean for some special event she is putting on. Every time she wants the place spic and span clean, we have to go through a slicandsham process to impress the cleaners.

Etymology: play on SPIC-AND-SPAN: a household cleaner; and also meaning immaculately clean, spotless and SLICK: done or made in a way that is clever and efficient but often does not seem to be sincere SHAM: a situation, feeling, system etc. that is not as good or true as it seems

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COMMENTS:

nice word - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-26: 12:36:00

Slic word! - Nosila, 2009-03-26: 17:21:00

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Fakeitz

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: fake-its

Sentence: Buffy would often rush her husband, Biffy to clean before the maid arrived, and he would snarl and call her a fakeitz, for not allowing anyone to see the real way they lived.

Etymology: Fake- It-

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Presheen

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: prēshēn

Sentence: Despite the fact that she was of legal age doesn't mean that Martha can't also be a presheen. Before she takes her car to the car wash she details it herself. Before she goes to her goes to her regular dentist for an annual check-up she will go to another for a dental cleaning. Her children have been known to go into hiding if she mentions the need for a haircut.

Etymology: pre (before) + sheen (shine or cause to shine softly) a play off of preteen

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Forexperfix

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: four-x-per-fix

Sentence: Trudie forexperfixed her house right before the cleaning lady came, and soon realized that after her cleaning lady finished, her house seemed dirtier than before.

Etymology: fore + expert + fix

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Modusoperandouble

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: mo dus op er an dub ull

Sentence: Carson wanted everyone to think he took excellent care of his Lambhorgini, so he washed and waxed it every week before he took it to the custom car center for it's weekly wash and wax. Carson topped off all the fluid levels, and changed the oil, oil filter, fuel filter, and air filter just before he paid a mechanic to do them all again. He felt gratified, that it was worth the double work and double cost, when they would tell him "You take better care of your Lambhorgini than any other customer takes care of their car." His need to impress was a success. Carson's wife, however, was not impressed by this senseless double work grind involving the sweat of two's brow, because Carson's modusoperandouble, was also highway jobbery on his wallet. She wasn't impressed by Carson's high way snobbery, either!

Etymology: Modusoperandouble is a pun on modus operandi and highway jobbery is a pun on highway robbery. MODUS OPERANDI - the way and method of doing anything; in this case the way of doing it yourself then paying others to do it again. DOUBLE - twice; as in double the work and double the cost.

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COMMENTS:

great etymology - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-26: 12:34:00

Yep! I like this one good job! :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-26: 16:22:00

Very eMOtional! - Nosila, 2009-03-26: 17:20:00

Very funny - Carson! ha! - splendiction, 2009-03-26: 21:21:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-03-26: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by nosila. Thank you nosila. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-10-08: 00:23:00
Today's definition was suggested by nosila. Thank you nosila. ~ James

karenanne karenanne - 2010-10-08: 09:13:00
I love this definition - it's so true!

RaunakThomas - 2013-07-27: 10:56:00
ROFL

Petrikreink - 2018-10-08: 12:54:00
What nice phrase

Svetikreink - 2018-10-10: 21:00:00