Verboticism: Vaparazzi

'Not now dear, Posh has stretch marks'

DEFINITION: v., To be so obsessed with the lives of celebrities that you neglect your own personal affairs, responsibilities and hygiene. n., A person who is infatuated with celebrities.

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: vahp-ah-rot-see

Sentence: The cubicle walls appeared to waver and then fix, and spots began to appear at the edges of Robert's sight. The worst headache of his life was beginning to effect his vision. He tasted blood in his mouth and realized he had nearly bitten through his lip. A peal of shrieking laughter washed over the wall from the adjacent cubicle. "I can't believe she left Ryan Phillipe! He's so cute!", squealed a nasally laser voice. "And did you see Kirstie Alley got dropped from Jenny Craig for getting fat again." the other gasped with breathless exhileration. Robert had done all he could; he had taken the issue to his supervisor, to HR, to the anonymous complaint line, but no one seemed concerned with the fact that the mind-splitting caterwauling day in and day out had prevented Robert from finishing the same report for three weeks straight. He swore he could hear their giggling in his sleep, and as his bloodshot eyes flicked aimlessly around the cubicle, the fabric walls beginning to get closer, as he looked desperately for a way out. A day later the headlines would declare "Lesbian Network Support Pair Found at HP in Apparent Murder-suicide". Photographs showed the Blade server unit used to bludgeon Marie, and the ethernet cable Darlene had managed to hang herself with. As he wiped the last traces of the tawdry note he had left at the scene from his thumb drive, and demolished it with a hammer, Robert thought that the two vaparazzi would be proud. Instead of reading sensational headlines, they were now making them.

Etymology: vapid + paparazzi

Points: 620

Comments: Vaparazzi

silveryaspen - 2008-02-15: 11:33:00
Frightfully good sentence. Your sentences make me wonder if you are a professional author of mysteries and murder mysteries! Vaparazzi is so fun to say and evokes lots of mind play! Excellent etymology and creation!

Banky - 2008-02-15: 12:19:00
Thanks for the compliment, but I'm just a scientist...I obviously do enjoy writing the stories, though. Quite possibly as much as making up the words, as witnessed by this exceedingly long Tolstoy (in length only, not quality)

silveryaspen - 2008-02-15: 20:36:00
Your colleagues are in for a treat if you write your scientific papers as interestingly and excitingly as you write here! I was stunned you are not a professional author of fiction!

Tigger - 2008-02-15: 22:38:00
Like a modern-day Edgar Allen Poe. Creepy, but ultimately satisfying story. Great Verboticism too!

OZZIEBOB - 2008-02-17: 16:53:00
Great word and tale!